Why did he say he thought we were just friends?

[Anonymous]

So there is this guy, and we slept together a few months ago, and since then he acted like he likes me.. he would buy me coffees and would even spend up to 8 hours together just walking around town etc... All my friends thought that he likes me. Anyways, we never actually talked about sleeping together and what it meant, so even though i thought he liked me, I was never quite sure where we stand. Basically, today I messaged him saying 'are we just friends, a yes or no will suffice cba for any long ass DMC' and he said 'yeah i thought we were just friends'... So does that mean that the whole time he was just leading me on? And why would he do that because he literally gained nothing from it as we didn't do anything since?

[Anonymous]

He doesn't think you have a relationship potential. Move on.

[Asker]

Yep, I think so too. Thank you!

[Lithium65]

were you upfront about what you were looking for?

[Asker]

I don't think so.. I wanted to talk about it but I didn't want to freak him out so I (stupidly) waited for him to and he didn't but acted all into me.

[Lithium65]

rule #1 with guys... be upfront and direct. don't expect him to get hints or ques, bc guys don't pick up on that stuff. this way there's no miscommunication. I'm not saying to be forceful, just honest and everyone is getting what they're looking for. ;j

[Asker]

Yep.. learnt that the hard way;'D

[Lithium65]

https://t.co/PfwtcjMEZY?amp=1

[hahahmm]

So what did you learn from this experience?

[Asker]

To never allow a guy any leeway when it comes to "the chat"

[hahahmm]

Yes. But I would not say he was leading you on. Maybe he's not sure what he wants. A guy (imo) is not going to spend 8 hours pretending to be into you when he has already gotten sex. Not saying you have to settle for what he is offering tho.

[Asker]

Do you think I should leave him alone?

[hahahmm]

Start looking for guys you think will be better for you and make them all a higher priority than him. Don't spend hours with the guy. Don't make time for him every day. Zero sex (sounds like that already). Either he will step up and ask for a deeper relationship or do nothing. But if he does try to get more say exactly what you want and do not settle for less.

And this is not playing games. It's prioritizing your life and having your own goals.

[Asker]

Thank you so much, that's really good advice. I'll definitely follow it:)