My boyfriend double texts me if I don't reply back to him in a timely manner?

[Anonymous]

He starts thinking I am purposely ignoring him and Then he get upset and asks me "what happened to you" or he says "I guess you are ignoring me" what's wrong with him? My phone isn't in my hand 24/7

[samhradh_leannan]

Remind him that you don't keep your phone on you every second. Reassure him that you're not intentionally ignoring him and you care about texting him back, you just have to put your phone down once in a while. How long is he usually waiting to hear from you? Are we talking minutes or hours here? If you're getting back to him within 15-30 minutes the majority of the time, then he doesn't have any reason to be upset with you. Your reassurance should be enough to calm him. If it's not, then there may be a deeper issue going on.

[Asker]

5-30 minutes

[samhradh_leannan]

That's a pretty reasonable time period.

[Asker]

Iknow right

[samhradh_leannan]

I'd say be tactful, and try to reassure him. But if he won't be consoled, then there's a bigger problem going on.

[Asker]

Okay thankyou

[Aelin]

To put it frankly, your boyfriend has self esteem or security issues. Unfortunately, that's up to him to fix himself, not up to you.

He can't be confident and trust you until he gets over his own personal insecurities. It's not your fault and honestly not your job to constantly reassure him.

[Asker]

I agree

[parvulus]

I've been in your boat. It's exhausting. I broke up with him and my life has been a lot more peaceful now. You should do the same.

[Asker]

Hmm good idea

[jp612612]

To be fair, it's common for young people to be clingy like that. Young people are hormonal, emotional, inexperienced, and most importantly, insecure. He may eventually get over it, but I would suggest gently nipping it in the bud. It may cause drama in the short-term, but if this relationship is going to survive, he's going to need to learn to chill.

[Asker]

What do I say

[jp612612]

Something like "Listen, the other night when you freaked out, I just didn't have my phone with me. I really like you, but you need to relax a little because it stresses me out when you overreact like that."

If he's reasonable, he'll feel a little embarrassed and will apologize, but given that he's young he might try to defend himself "I didn't freak out! All I did was ask how you were doing! etc. etc." and this is why I said that in the short-term, it might cause more drama as you have to deal with him in self-defense mode. But hopefully it's not like that. The thing is, if you do nothing, you're just going to have to continue to deal with it and while there are some who like clingy, clearly you don't and it's just going to ruin the relationship.

[Asker]

Yeah it's ruining it

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

He's being impatient with you and insecure i would double think concerning him.

[Asker]

I am double thinking actually

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Yeah that's good , Best wishes on this matter~!

[Ads123]

Bot going to lie i've often felt this way where i know my girlfriend was ignoring me yet still talking with others but i never said anything to her about it.. i know that in relationships both people need some space.. i'm sure he'll start to see it that way eventually otherwise he just needs to learn to trust you

[Asker]

I'm not purposely ignoring him though lol

[Ads123]

He just might think you are and thats for him to get over

[Asker]

Ahh I see

[TheManWithAPlan99]

He can't believe he's got a girlfriend like you or he has had a bad experience with a girl cheating In the past maybe you've cheated maybe there's rumors you have or maybe like I said he's used to a lot of girls just dropping him.

[Asker]

A girl like me?

[TheManWithAPlan99]

Well I'm assuming that he sees something in you maybe he sees you as really pretty like 10/10 and he rates himself as a solid 2 or something and he's just surprised you'd go for him and that you'd surly drop him for a 3 or higher.

[Asker]

Ahh okay I see

[Robsinsf53]

Let me ask, does that really upset you or is it good to know that you have a guy that really cares about you? Insecurity might be his reason to keep doubling down on you.

[Asker]

It bothers me because I don't give him a reason to be insecure

[Robsinsf53]

OK yeah that's understandable. I recently had someone to where I have to answer right away but, she calls me back whenever... I had to unload that right because no one needs that shit. He must have been shit on in the past and really all you can do is tell him you ain't that girl & hope he gets it.

[Asker]

Ok thank you

[Robsinsf53]

Yeah good luck with that.😊

[ampers]

I had a girl that did that. She was crazy as a ferret.
This boy is insecure. Tell him to stop being pathetic or dump him

[Asker]

Insecure? I don't give him a reason to be

[ampers]

I'm sure it's not anything you did. Don't blame yourself for his personal problems

[Asker]

Ok thankyou

[MimosasAfterChurch]

I would say being together with somebody that insecure will not work, he wants you on a tight leash. It will only get worse with time.

[Asker]

I might as well leave

[TadCurious]

He sounds needy and maybe also entitled. Like: "How dare she not respond immediately to my text?" But like you say, you have a life and you're not holding your phone all the time.

[Asker]

Right

[Dale1982]

My girlfriend used to do that HELLO! Want a paddle with that dingy (that was slang for ignore then), then a big line of? I lost the plot eventually and told her to fuck off

[Asker]

Wow...

[drthommy]

Maybe Just Tell him hey i will write in 30 min. again.. gotta do that and that..
So he knows what's going on

[Asker]

Okay I'll try

[1996katrina]

Tell him he's too clingy and that you've got stuff to do

[Asker]

Ok I will

[Shimy]

Wow... You told him that sometimes you're busy and can't check your phone?

[Asker]

Yess

[cattertone]

If you just leave him hanging without an explanation, that can be very annoying, but his words seem very clingy at the same time

[Asker]

He is clingy I have a job

[cattertone]

Just say, going to work, ttyl

[Asker]

Okay

[Nice-girl-101]

He's lonely without you. Its sweet. He'll calm down eventually. Just be patient

[Asker]

Ok I'll try lol

[Humbledman74006]

He is needy, give him a pair of your panties, tell him to put them on since you obviously are more a man than him

[Asker]

Haha lol

[Anonymous]

He is panicior, better spend time with him or else things will not go good way. Tell him to stop messaging thing and it will be better if you both talked directly instead of using messages.

[Asker]

I think I'll talk to him

[ravii100]

If he his 24/7 available for u thn u also should i think
If he feel bad about late reply its ur responsibilty somehow to make him feel better

[Asker]

Ok I understand

[Midniite]

Yeah he just seems to be clingy and that will eventually turn into a possessive nature which is never good for anyone.

[Asker]

How did he get clingy and how can I let him know that I'm not doing this on purpose

[Midniite]

It's just common, a lot of guys are insecure about themselves and it causes them to get clingy so you don't go anywhere. The only thing you can do is tell him and if he isn't okay with the fact that you don't text him back immediately then I would leave.

[Asker]

I think I am

[Midniite]

Glad I could help.

[darkknightrises]

He is thinking about if you re texting to anlther guys

[Asker]

Wow really

[darkknightrises]

Exactly

[litty]

If he was checking her phone then that would explain it

[Asker]

@litty he's not checking my phone

[Zer0Ghost]

Impatience, don't overthink

[Asker]

OKAY I'll try not to

[SAMI_DABBAB]

You are ignoring him.

[Asker]

No I'm not

[SAMI_DABBAB]

Do you think you did something wrong?

[Asker]

No I dont

[SAMI_DABBAB]

Sorry for acting so cold.
I think he is weighting his options.

[Asker]

What do you mean

[SAMI_DABBAB]

He wants you to act wrong so he can take advantage.
He maybe is thinking about leaving.
After all its just an opinion.

[Asker]

Umm ok

[Listening5]

Then u gotta be a little faster
Cmon

[Asker]

Umm no

[Listening5]

18 mins to reply my comment, see the problem

[Asker]

Bye smh

[anoddtod]

So.. when a guy does it...

[Asker]

Huh?

[Revolver_Ocelot]

i think he likes you

[Asker]

He's my boyfriend

[Revolver_Ocelot]

He loves you

[Asker]

Why do you think that? I'm confused

[Revolver_Ocelot]

lDK lelelelleleleleel

[Revolver_Ocelot]

i think he obsesses over u

[Asker]

Smh bye

[Revolver_Ocelot]

no I'm serious, he's obsessed with u, why else would he keep checking up on u

[Asker]

He doesn't keep checking he texts back two or three times if I don't reply fast

[Revolver_Ocelot]

I see, you should break up with him if he annoys u

[Asker]

Okay

[Revolver_Ocelot]

sure

[BronzedAdonis]

bit clingy

[Asker]

Yeahhh