Why Does He Hide Me??

[Im_His_Jinx]

My boyfriend and I have been together for more than a year now. He’s well known in the paranormal circuit. He even travels to speak at conferences. While our families and close friends know, other than that, he keeps it hidden. He says it’s for both of our protection, because if the wrong person were to find out about us, they will try to ruin the relationship. We’ve already been through it once, and the other woman is acting like he cheated on her with me… but that’s beside the point. I’m ready to just give up, but I don’t want to do that. I love him so much. I don’t want to give him an ultimatum, but I am tired of hiding in the shadows when he is doing his radio shows and such. What would you do?

[sandyyyy]

If my boyfriend is "hiding" me from the public, and this bothers me, I would confront him. I wouldn't give him an ultimatum as this would leave him not many options open. I would say, I would like to tell you that it bothers me very much when you "hide" me from the public. I am willing to take on any pressures that the society puts on us, so, please, let's just come public. okay, first of all, why is he being so general and mysterious? What is this "protection?" who are the "wrong people" how can or what can they do to "ruin" your relationship? if you two love each other very much, what can actually ruin you? What dangers are you facing? (consider: would this "danger" affect you very much or, if it is just mild then w.e)

Come to a consensus in which both of you are pleased and agree with this. This is the best way to deal with a relationship, trying to resolve the problem and be comfortable with each other. Why distress yourself in a relationship, when it is happiness you seek?

[Im_His_Jinx]

From what I have already dealt with, it includes harassment, internet stalking, and lies. From other situations I?ve seen, it has caused divorces, and one poor man takes his wife everywhere with him, because neither of them could take the stress of phone calls from woman that swears he cheated on his wife with them. His wife still gets those phone calls, even when she is at the event with him. My boyfriend?s last relationship was ruined by one of these women. He says he?s just doing it to prote

[sandyyyy]

So, are you willing to take on these problems? is it worth it? and, why not get a restraining order?

[nermalinda]

He's trying to protect you, and it does make sense because most couples in the public eye suffer a lot from it and try to keep their lives private.

But if you feel he might not be honest with you or he's hiding you so he can get with other women, you might want to end things. He's not going to fess up about it, and you don't want to spend the rest of your life living in a way you dislike if you're not comfortable with being the hidden SO.

I wouldn't give him an ultimatum, because I can guarantee he's going to choose his current way of life and career over you. Not to sound insulting, but that's usually how things go.

Honestly, I feel like it's all about whether or not you want to be with someone who has a public life. Both the privacy and infidelity issues go with it, and you have to decide if he's worth it. Don't try to make him change for you, rather try to decide if you want him the way he is.