Why would a attractive guy be single for a long time even though he’s looking for relationship?

[Anonymous]

I know many girls have been kinda come for him but he’s still single.

[Pummel]

I am sorry. I miss read your question.. (I know... DUHH) I read it as.. "why would an attractive guy be single for a long time?" did not see the "even though" part.

I can answer the first part because I have not had a relationship in 15 years (give or take a day or two) I had three relationships in my life and they all cheated. I was kind, loving, affectionate, understanding, 6ft. 3in. 200lbs., brown hair, blue eyes and my eye never even looked in the direction of another woman... never.

Did you notice the attributes missing from the description of myself? If you guessed what I did for a living and day to day personality and how dependable I was. Oh brother... lol
I was only truly in love with #3, and I mean I still got butterflies in my stomach after two years, just watching her get off the train and walking through the park from a distance.

A couple of months prior we got in trouble.. She was pregnant.. And I was for keeping the baby and marring her. I mean I went to her house with her to explain to her mother and siblings that I was not going anywhere and that I was madly in love with her daughter, and wanted to marry her...
Now I was a front man for a late 90's early 2000's hardcore band... To her family who were not originally from the United States... this was a looser job... being a musician that is..
I was selfish when it came to planning the future with her.. Of course she wanted me to go on vacations, dinners, theatre, clubs (she was into dance music... and I wasn't lol )

long story short, she had an abortion and left me two months later for an ex-boyfriend and I never saw her or talked to her again. But it broke my heart beyond compare, see cheated on me which I had begged her to please never to that to me.

I think she did it that way because (a) she was young and (b) she knew that would be a deal breaker. Now she is not the reason why I choose to stay alone, no I was abused from the 6th grade to the 8th grade and I never told her (the only person who knows to this day is my brother... that's only because he was the bass player in our band and my lyrics were getting bizarre to say the least)

bottom line is maybe the young feller you are interested in has deep issues... believe the signs will be there... I pray all goes well for you..

[twis7]

hey, it's me! I'm single cause the conversations don't get very far.. it boils down to two things:

they find out they don't want to talk to me anymore.

I find out I don't want to talk to them anymore.

okay it's not so cut and dry. I am one of many options. when I find out that I'm competing, I exit the game. I have no interest in proving anything.

these women you speak of are exploring many options. I'm not always perceived as the best one.

the ones that are returning my attention? they want me as a friend, a backup. fuck that. I'm not waiting in line. so I'm single... maybe till I die, but I'm not putting anyone first that won't put me first. oh you got kids? me too. but putting me first IS putting your kids first... just as I thought of you as an investment...

everything comes with risk. we must mitigate our risk as much as possible, but there must always be sacrifice. we can't have our cake and eat it too.

I hope this was fun to read ;)

[Asker]

He used to find me attractive/ stare at me in public. I initiated some conversations with him on snapchat. He seemed to like to talk to me. The I stopped talking to me because I wanted him to reach out to me. He still views every single snapchat story of mine. He likes quotes on instagram that talk about how someone should be patient and keep praying about something that he wants etc

[Asker]

And months later he’s still single

[twis7]

my ex wife... the last time we were together were sitting beside each other. this was like 5 years ago. I could feel the sexual tension between us. I didn't make a move... I know she wanted me to. I just wanted her to initiate for once. just one time, show me that YOU want ME... but she didn't.. and I didn't make a move. I haven't seen or spoken to her since that month. do you know who fucked up? me. do you know why? because I didn't communicate it to her what I wanted. our marriage failed for different reasons. she fell into the drug life. but that situation was one of many that was on me, not her. don't test. be direct. be open. with everyone. even if you're not dating... just speak your mind. ask him why he doesn't pursue you. he may think it'd be an unwanted advance.

[Asker]

So he could be just shy?

[twis7]

shy, unaware, there are countless reasons. ask him. hey, why aren't you pursuing me?

[TheBigGuy9]

I’ll list mine although I’m not looking: High standards, i’m a felon... non-violent but a felon nonetheless (scares away many women), i’ve cheated so much in the past that I don’t trust myself. I’ve told many women they don’t want to date me. I’ll end up breaking their heart.

[Leavesbound]

There could be many reasons including he's shy or he doesn't like girls.

[Asker]

He used to find me attractive/ stare at me in public every time he saw me in public. I initiated some conversations with him on snapchat. He seemed to like to talk to me. The I stopped talking to me because I wanted him to reach out to me. He still views every single snapchat story of mine. He likes quotes on instagram that talk about how someone should be patient and keep praying about something that he wants etc

[Asker]

And months later he’s still single

[kkirk4442]

Maybe he's looking for the one that fits just right for him.

[Asker]

He used to find me attractive/ stare at me in public. I initiated some conversations with him on snapchat. He seemed to like to talk to me. The I stopped talking to me because I wanted him to reach out to me. He still views every single snapchat story of mine. He likes quotes on instagram that talk about how someone should be patient and keep praying about something that he wants etc

[Asker]

And months later he’s still single

[ManHater]

He could be gay. Homosexuals are usually Attractive guys, has that ever come across your mind?

[Asker]

He used to find me attractive/ stare at me in public. I initiated some conversations with him on snapchat. He seemed to like to talk to me. The I stopped talking to me because I wanted him to reach out to me. He still views every single snapchat story of mine. He likes quotes on instagram that talk about how someone should be patient and keep praying about something that he wants etc

[Asker]

And months later he’s still single

[Anonymous]

he might be a male gay

[Asker]

He used to find me attractive/ stare at me in public. I initiated some conversations with him on snapchat. He seemed to like to talk to me. The I stopped talking to me because I wanted him to reach out to me. He still views every single snapchat story of mine. He likes quotes on instagram that talk about how someone should be patient and keep praying about something that he wants etc

[Asker]

And months later he’s still single

[hellacray]

He has options.