Guys, How important is alone time to you?

[Anonymous]

Say you work 40h a week and only have weekends off. Would you say seeing your girlfriend every other weekend is ok or do you think that’s too little?

[magiusX26]

it really depends. one factor is what type of work? cause let me tell you, 40 hours of digging ditches is very different from 40 hours sitting at a desk doing paperwork and there are a lot of jobs out there that are somewhere in between these 2 extremes. there is also other things in life that may occur like family obligations, illness (including stuff you dont even realize till later) , jury duty, household shopping, taking care of a sick friend, etc. so could be your guy is more tired than you think. add in some of us wind up working more than 40 hoyrs a week.

[magiusX26]

as for alone time in general, that importance varies from person to person. i am one who is fine with alottttttttttt of alone time, at least till i dont want alone time.

[Asker]

Office job

[abc3643]

Weekends "off"?

No such thing! That's when the REAL work starts since there are oceans of chores/shopping to do. For example, this past Saturday, I drove 200 miles just to do shopping-related chores. I drove another 30 the next day.

My "alone time" occurs after 10 PM on weeknights if that. Since I work, this means maybe an hour or two before bed.

[Asker]

So you don’t take days to yourself without your partner or work?

[abc3643]

No, that's not really possible.
We live in rural Missouri and have 9 animals: 6 dogs, 2 cats, 1 horse.
My wife takes time for camping, trail riding, and kayaking and these take time to prep for. When she is gone, THEN I have some alone-time... or when I am shopping, but that's not the kind of alone time I need or want. But, even when she's gone, then I have to take care of the animals by myself and do as much cleaning/cooking/chores that I want without her micromanagement commentary.

[Asker]

Oh but you’re married that’s different. We don’t live together

[Finchie40]

I never really understood people needing space from relationships , if you really like someone you shouldn’t really need any space from them , people that need space from a loving partner to me is up to no good , they just like the convenience of you , There should be no set schedule what so ever , Communicating with your partner shouldn’t be hard to do , if I didn’t want to see her I would just tell her that I didn’t want to get together that day and tell her why , but when a schedule is set and in place then that just goes to show that person is toxic and controlling and I would totally reconsider staying in a relationship with them, Never be someone’s convenience, When you become a convenience to someone that isn’t love that is being used

[CasuallySamsonite]

I love my alone time and my space but... Too little, Maybe if you were seeing each other on weekdays or a few hours after work too that would be different.

[serious]

For me it is very important. It is one of my top priorities.

[Anonymous]

It is very important. If I don't get it enough I would create problems or break up with her and have more time alone

[boggboss]

That or once a week

[Asker]

Say for example the weekend you see one another is Friday night until Sunday evening. Then is every other week ok or would you want to see her more?

[boggboss]

Me personally I would wanna see her more but thats because I'm a touchy feely person I don't like communication over text or phone

[spartan55]

How far apart do you live from him?

[Asker]

Maybe an hour

[spartan55]

Yeah, twice a month wouldn't be like having a girlfriend to me.

[Asker]

:(((

[spartan55]

Don't you feel like you should see each other more?

[Asker]

Yes, but he said he wanted it this way so he could take time for himself sometimes. He will FaceTime me maybe once a week and still text me everyday but we only meet every other weekend Friday night to Sunday evening

[spartan55]

So you have roughly 6/30 days of the month you spend with him... I'd say his 'alone time' is covered.

[Asker]

I don’t know what to do. I’ve spoken about it but he’s adamant he needs that time

[spartan55]

I guess you to decide if it's worth staying together then. Not compromising is a red 🚩

[spartan55]

I definitely wouldn't be sticking around.

[Honesttguy]

Yeah thats okey

[JesseJayNeak]

Every weekend. I get lonely easily

[Joker_]

Not very important

[Landy24]

every 2-4 weeks

[anylolone]

A lot.