Guys, Do you always try to get back with your first (love, first kiss, first time, all of the. above etc.)?

[Sabrina224]

yes

no

[Lost_in_the_Woods]

I voted yes, but it depends on how you define always.

I always try to get back with her in the same way I always bang my shin on the hardwood stairs when I try to run up them in socks. Sometimes I remember the past and do the smart thing instead.

I'll always love her in a way I don't love anyone else. I'd probably always give her a chance to show me she is still the person I loved back then and that she really wants to make it work. I'll always want that back...

But do I always try to get it back? Not in the way you might think. I try to get her to stop hanging out with barnicles and abusers, stop getting high and whoring herself out in the internet, stop wasting her life and actually be her amazing self, to go after her dreams and live a life she could be happy with.

I want HER back. I want her to be herself again and be back like the terminator said he would be. I don't miss her name, or her body, I miss who she was.

But do I want her in my house? 😬
Do I want to kiss her and buy her flowers?
Do I want to be in a relationship with her?

Not the person she is today.

I'll always want the real her back, I'll never stop caring about that girl. Sometimes I wonder if she was even real or if she was just a facade created to string me along. But I'll never feel like that girl wasn't or isn't or won't be worth my time. Because the truth is I know she could be that great and then some. But I stopped beating myself up over it. I stopped paying her bills when she screws up or gets thrown out of her mom's/boyfriends house.

I'll never give up on the belief that im gonna see her win someday. Snap out of it and be happy...

But I have given up on trying to be a part of that. I have given up on thinking there is something I can do to make that happen. I don't hold my breath or look the other way thinking she is the only one for me.

I want her to get herself back. I'm always trying to see that happen. But I'm not putting my own happiness aside to try to suffer that shit show anymore because I'm honestly so much happier staying home with my cat.

So yeah, I always tried. But eventually I realized I was trying to do something that only she could. So now I just try to nudge her in the right direction without losing my own course.


I think most guys will always have a special place for that first girl. I think everyone falls the hardiest that one time and it doesn't happen again. But that doesn't mean it's the right match. Maybe it is, but maybe there is a reason it didn't work. Maybe it was one of them. Maybe it was both of them. Maybe if I had been a better boyfriend she wouldn't have ended up where she is today... but I know I always tired. She chose her path. I couldn't stop her.

Maybe that's just life. Maybe she will work it out and get herself back. Maybe that girl still loves me, or maybe she's dead gone and forgotten even to herself.

I'll always want that girl back, but not so much that I would rather be miserable than love myself and be happy instead.

My advice is to stop trying to get someone back and start trying to see the bigger picture. Why didn't it work, what could fix it? Is it even really what you want, is it what they want?

Love is like a fart. If you have to force it it's probably shit.

But it's also like your favorite movie, if it meant so much to you the first time you're always gonna want to watch it again.

Problem is movies don't change over time, but people do. The person you fell in love with might be someone else now. For better or for worse. YOU can't get them back, you just have to hope they choose that for themselves,

don't hold your breath because it doesn't always happen that way.

But shit, you can always try. Just be careful what you put into it.

[MrOracle]

No. If a relationship ends, then it ENDS. I tell the women that I date that they can leave at any time, but it's a one way door, so if they walk out of it, there's no way back in, ever.

I won't be held hostage by threats of break ups, and I won't keep someone against their will. We can work on problems together, but if she thinks that she is better off on her own, then she should go and not look back.

[TheMajesticKing777]

I hit her up again a while after the breakup just to clear the air and to get both perspectives but unfortunately she didn't want to respond to me, weither it's a grudge or anger, I don't care anymore, I'll keep going on my path that God is guiding me down and I'll find the right girl when I do.

[Drumlin2001]

I was a very late bloomer, didn't have a relationship till I was 35. My first was my first everything (relationship, kiss, sex, love). Things ended in a bad way (she ended things, we had an unexpected pregnancy and miscarriage).
There is part of me that wants to know how she is. Want to talk to her. But I know there is a good reason why it wouldn't work.

[FunkyMonkee]

No but, she DID find me, one evening and we had nice long talk and then, just before she left, she gave me hug and a kiss and started playing tonsil hockey with me!
girlfriend #2 also came back 2 or 3 times!
So far, girlfriend #3 hasn't been heard from by me in about 20 years!! And I can't really say I care!!
I wish girlfriend #4 would get in touch with me! I'd still love to change her last name! Been about 10 years since I last talked to her.

[AimeeKyle]

I didn’t go in search of my first middle school girlfriend/love…. But we ran into each other the summer following our first year of college. We quickly realized we weren’t a long term match (she was looking for a much older, sugar daddy). It was an extremely fun couple of weeks though. I haven’t seen her since.

[GMANN56]

I had a girlfriend when I was 6 years old.
I saw her at a party when we were in our 20s and kissed her for the first time
that night. She then told me that she was getting married in a month.
Ran into the girl who took my virginity at a party 8 years later. We left, went to her
place and fucked all night. Haven't seen her since.
I have been in love, in relationships and broken up more times than I can recall.
but I have no bad feelings towards any of them.

[Ray1980]

The person I first lost it to I cared nothing about. The actual first love I was devastated. I never fell that hard for a girl again & doubt I ever do. First love was all of the above.

[Sabrina224]

Would I be able to message you about your thoughts on this? I'm asking for personal reasons

[Ray1980]

Sure, if I can help more than happy to.

[berwise13]

I didn't really try to get back with my first love. But after 25 years of marriage my wife passed away. 2 days after she passed (I was in Ga) my first love sent a friend request (she was in texas) I accepted told her what had happened she was headed back to her hometown (Wilmington N C.) She ask if she could buy me dinner. We are getting married this summer.

[Kabluie]

I don't think I remember who I kissed first, but the person I first had sex at 14, we are still friends today, and we had done the deed again years ago.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Usually not but my first ex talked many years ago like she wanted to get back with me but it never happened we had legal matters so too much water over the dam so we didn't get back together.

[VikingWarLord]

HELL NAW!

She's fat and has at least 3 kids (last I checked). She was a hot skinny little blondie back in high school, was on the Dance Team. But now she looks like a Land-Whale.

[TommyMountainFigure]

No. I quite being a sentimental fool a LONG time ago. It nearly cost me my sanity.

[RobT312]

I tried once... never materialized.
i never did it again after that

[SolitarySolace]

No. They’re an ex for a reason. Why go back to old goods when there's more options out there that'll most likely be equally bad if not worse

[northwestripper666]

I voted no. Maybe I tried once, but I regret the break up, it was on me. Could have been junior high sweetheart for life. I still miss her to this day.

[Guslove]

I often think of her but she doesn’t live near me anymore..

[herebesteve]

Tried to, luckily, it didn't happen.

[noohair]

You can't grow in the past

[Vick2828]

for me, I hate my exes, so no.

[Slim57]

I did but I realized it was a mistake

[Hadyyy]

Why are you asking that?

[Fuentes]

Hell nope

[Anonymous]

Not at all dude