Why is he entertaining me if he really isn’t intetested?

[Anonymous]

He rejected me because of communication issues. Now we’re chatting again (he’s replying to my texts).

Does that mean that he’s interested again? We went to one date before. We weren’t friends before all this.

[Anonymous]

Saying he’s replying to your texts gives me the impression that you reached out. If that’s the case then it’s possible he’s just being friendly, maybe a bit bored and doesn’t mind the conversation.

[Asker]

Yeah I did reach out to him.

[Asker]

Some people are saying that it’s not just because of boredness

[Opinion Owner]

If it’s not boredom then likely out of friendliness. Already he’s told you where he stands, so if you keep engaging conversation then when he responds, he’s doing so with the mindset that you understand and accept what he wants, and are fine with a friendship. If you are still wanting more, then don’t keep pushing or trying to squeeze a change of heart out of someone who isn’t looking for romance, no matter how much you like him and how much potential you see. Because that only leads to more of this situation where you’re overthinking his actions and getting confused, when you already know what’s up. Don’t do that to yourself any further.

[Asker]

I don't know I’ve seen situations where guy rejects/ breaks up with a girl for something and then they work out whatever problem/ issue that they had

[Asker]

It’s possible

[Asker]

He knows that I don’t really want friendship with him

[Opinion Owner]

Are there stories about women who have been rejected and eventually it turns into a relationship? Sure, just like there are stories about people falling from 40 ft tall buildings and not having a broken bone. What I’m saying is, you can’t base your actions off of other peoples experiences. You don’t take a rejection, and mentally decide you’re going to turn it into a relationship one way or another, because that is the quickest way to set yourself up. When this man rejected you because of communication, the bigger picture there was that he just wasn’t interested in you, or a relationship with you. You will rationalize what he said and try to figure out how to fix it, when you’re missing the bigger picture. If you want a relationship, get someone who is ready, right now. Don’t play yourself by pushing and pushing an unavailable man to be ready and making it more in your mind. Accept that it didn’t work out, and move on. Because what he’s seeing right now is that you are ready to settle for any little bit he would give, and that is the last thing you want unless you are desperate. This isn’t me trying to make you upset, this is just some tough love if your friends are giving you that irl.

[Asker]

Tbh I was a b! tch to him and I communicated poorly with him.

[Opinion Owner]

Honestly if that was an issue for you then, it’ll be an issue again until you address it and work on that. At the same time, you don’t want a person who brings that out of you in general, but makes you better. Regardless, if he’s not interested in a relationship right now, you have to take that at face value, not make it mean what you want it to mean. Because then you will invest more time, and once you see it isn’t going anywhere, you’ll get frustrated and lash out because you’ll feel led on, when that’s not a fair emotion at all, you’d have done it to yourself. I understand you’re trying to rationalize the situation as “it’s basically all my fault it didn’t work so I want to show him I’ve changed and maybe it’ll work this time”, that thought process is counterproductive and purposely oblivious. You’re focused too much on the future you want rather than what you actually do have in the present, which is nothing to work with. You’ve got to accept his rejection and let that guy go. Start fresh with someone new, who also wants a relationship and isn’t judging you from the past.

[Asker]

He wants serious relationship he actually said that to me. He said that we initially started to talk when he was looking for a serious relationship and he’s still looking for that.

[Asker]

At the same time I will keep my options open. I already have a date lined up but I still want to see if I can work things out with this guy

[Opinion Owner]

But that was at the beginning, when everything was fresh and new, you two still had potential and nothing had happened. It’s completely irrelevant to your situation now that he’s rejected you, it’s not even on the table. You have to focus on that, rather than what was said in the beginning, because it’s not helpful right now. If you’re adamant about still pursuing that man then do what you want, but when it all falls down, you can't say anything or feel any way because you set yourself up for the hurt.

[Gent207]

Other possibilities include:
you're his back-up plan
He gets off on the admiration
He's bored and you are his entertainment.
-
If he was truly interested in you he wouldn't have let a simple miscommunication issue get in the way.

[Asker]

We had communication issues and then I removed him from my instagram…

[Asker]

He’s basically still giving me hope by chatting with me. I don’t think that he’s that jerk and cruel

[Gent207]

He's probably a decent guy but in this situation I don't think he's in the right. I think you best block him on all apps and avoid him

[Asker]

He could be still interested.

[FilmGuy93]

He might enjoy your company, even if he doesn't appreciate the communication problems.

[Asker]

So he’s interested?

[FilmGuy93]

Probably not.

[In_Trance]

He has no other options and wants the P

[Asker]

I think he has options

[In_Trance]

Then what's the reason?

[Asker]

You tell me

[In_Trance]

Smh... I just did!

[Asker]

He changed his mind about me