Why do older guys pay attention to me, and not guys my own age?

[Anonymous]

Hi all!

I'm a college student, 20 year old female, and within recent years, I've noticed that I'm getting a lot of attention from older men (30-50s). I'm a good student; I tend to act older and dress/act eccentrically. I have a boyfriend who's my age, however, he's a bit quirky like me. (He's an exception, I think.)

Older guys will smile at me, gaze from afar, and try to engage me. Something that's especially hard to notice, is that I've had a few of my older professors, behave this way towards me. I had a professor who would always watch me when I wasn't looking, and would gaze into my eyes when I walked by him. I had another one that ate in the cafeteria at the same time as me, sat near/in front of me; facing me, so he could make eye contact with me.

Most memorable, was this one professor who I saw on two occasions:

1. Last year, I was attending a department interest meeting with my sister. We (and everyone else) were talking before the meeting started. My sister quietly mentioned that the professor had something on his face. I looked at him momentarily, to check her claim, and when I looked up he immediately looked at me. Suddenly, he awkwardly wiped his face, which was bright red. I felt bad. Meanwhile, I find it hard to believe he heard us, unless he was focusing intentionally on our conversation.

2. I saw him again in a small seating area with a few students, recently; I had forgotten about him. He kept watching me; when I would look up from my laptop, he would immediately draw his eyes to me. He watched me leave, and when I walked by him, his head turned to look me in the face as I left -- practically gawking.

I don't quite understand why I'm in this position or why older guys and my professors do this. They make it purposeful, which is ridiculous, since it's completely inappropriate. I'm the last person who would ever try to get with a professor, and I feel as though I should be concerned...

I'd appreciate any insight!

[MrOracle]

Based on your description, you're something of an exception, but the world doesn't work on exceptions, it works on the RULE - how the vast majority are or behave.

So, how do the majority behave today, and how is that different from the past? Traditionally, people overwhelmingly got married, usually to someone who lived close to them, and usually before the age of 21. Unmarried people older than 25 were rare. Couples without children were rare. Divorce was rare, and scandalous, with Hollywood in the 1920s and 30s being the first place in the world where divorce became common.

That changed with the rise of 3rd-wave Feminism in the 1960s, which was largely a Marxist-based movement (pro-Marxists using Feminism as a costume to push Marxist policies), and by hormonal birth control. Feminists filled women's magazines, and soon colleges, books, movies, TV shows, and HR departments with anti-marriage, anti-male policies. In the 1980s, women were being strongly indoctrinated (even by their own mothers) to skip relationships and go to college and focus on their careers - ideas pushed by Feminist leaders in the 70s, 80s, and 90s. The goal of these leaders was to end marriage completely, but they couldn't quite convince women to completely stay away from men. They DID successfully convince women to wait until their 30s (when their fertility window was already closing) to START to look for a serious relationship, and that was almost good enough. Why? Because the single most important reason that a man is willing to risk modern marriage under rules that are HEAVILY skewed against him, is for CHILDREN. And women in their 30s have, at best, a very limited ability to provide children.

Men have slowly woken up to this reality (I admit, men are slow to accept change), but more and more men today are unwilling to consider a serious relationship with a woman in her 30s or older anymore, because the risks are too high (older women are much more likely to be radically feminist) and the benefits are too low (no children). Thus, men who really want a serious relationship and children are seeking out women in their 20s (regardless of his own age) who are still fertile, who are less entrenched in radical feminism, and who are likely to make far better wives and mothers. Older men are also far more likely to be in a better financial situation to support a wife and family.

Likewise, younger men are endlessly told by younger women that they cannot compete with the resources of top 5% men - the ones they see living an incredibly high lifestyle on Instagram (often faked, but that's irrelevant since most women believe it). Men know they need resources to get a serious relationship today, but men in their 20s - early 20s especially - know they don't have any, so they don't even bother to try for serious relationships. Instead, when they think of women, most think of them strictly as providers of sex. This is why guys your age aren't pursuing you - you're a "relationship girl" who isn't likely to give them casual sex, and most guys have been trained (by women, for generations) not to consider relationships in their 20s.

You may be more of a traditional women and not a feminist, but, again, that makes you the exception, not the rule. Half of all men have grown up in a house with a single, usually feminist mother. They don't even realize that they've been trained to think in feminist ways - it's all they've ever known. And these men are behaving in ways that women aren't attracted to - but ironically, these same women push for even more feminist ideals among men.

[Sixgunsound]

Most men are looking for youth beauty purity fertility and compatible personality. As long as he doesn’t do or say anything I would take him staring (but not necessarily gawking) as a compliment that you are his idea of feminine perfection. If it crosses the line to saying or doing anything I would definitely tell the department head or dean.

[Sixgunsound]

Thanks for MHO

[Apple1996]

Older guys just get creepy like that. It's best to avoid them and date your own age like your already doing

[macjets007]

You may seem intimidating to the younger dudes... no matter how much we age our perception of how attractive someone is doesn't change. You likely are very confident and pretty so they probably want to give you attention but find you unapparoachable. All ya gotta do is say hi and smile, and you'll have the guys your age :)

[888theGreat]

Because guys remember when they were younger and chicks like you were possible. You will be looking at younger guys wishing you were younger some day

[Hardworkingguy]

It's true I'm close to thirty and I seem to get more attention from women in their early 20s. I suppose I lije them more too since they're more Open minded and fun to be with

[Anonymous]

Women are in their prime during their 20s, so men are sexually attracted to them. This is common knowledge. Not sure why it comes as a surprise to anyone.