Why are there so many shallow superficial guys on this website?

[Dawnlind92]

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1 y

I mean some guy said they'd leave a girl they were dating if she ended up needed a mastectomy due to cancer!

Others said they'd leave a girl if she had cellulite I look at the profile pics and wonder why these guys are so shallow.

[Anonymous]

Learned behaviour. There was a time when I trusted women. Then I started dating 🤣. When you realize that the vast majority of women today have no loyalty you learn not to invest very deeply. And as soon as her marketability runs out. She gains weight, gets some wrinkles, becomes to much of a financial burden then it's time to trade her in for a newer model. After all, she'd do it to you in a heartbeat.

[Dawnlind92]

Understandable. I'm more talking about extremes if that makes sense, like guys leaving an otherwise gorgeous girl for cellulite or oddly shaped breasts and no other reason

[Opinion Owner]

I think you need to consider the source it's the internet. Don't necessarily believe everything you read.

[Dawnlind92]

A guy said he'd leave his girlfriend on her deathbed if she ended up getting cancer and as a result needed a double mastectomy.

[Opinion Owner]

And he could really be that guy. But what I'm telling you is there is just as many women who would do that to men. And the important thing to remember is how toxic this site is. Most people on here are just venting frustration and taking it out on the opposite gender, both women and men. It's a cold world. But it's mostly just an impersonal world. Most people don't hate others the just don't care about others more than they care about themselves.

[Dawnlind92]

I agree with you and what you said makes sense.

It seems you understand that I'm referring to extremes... such as the man who admitted to leaving a girlfriend who he loved on her deathbed if she required a mastectomy as he would no longer find her attractive.

I'm not referring to men, who, for example, would not date an overweight woman, or a super tall women...

We all have preferences and that is understandable, beauty is in the eye of a beholder.

But if something like cancer happens to a long time partner, and changes the way they look, I feel it is cruel to all of a sudden leave that person on their deathbed.

[Opinion Owner]

I agree. But unfortunately some people do it. What you may also want to keep in mind is that people change. Sometimes a partner who's going through something like cancer will drive thier partner away. Because they love them and don't want to be a burden on them. My sister had a lifelong kidney ailment that unfortunately resulted in her early death. But she used to make it really hard on my brother in law in her final years. Now to be fair she went into a coma and suffered some brain damage that changed a her personality a bit. It made her a bit paranoid. And no one blamed her for this. But it really made his care for her really difficult those final years.

[Dawnlind92]

Thank you, that makes a lot of sense. Something like a life threatening illness, or brain damage results in profound emotional stress for all parties involved.

However the guy who said he'd leave a girl due to her needing a mastectomy admitted to only doing so because he couldn't handle the appearance of no breasts and scars...

[Pot8o]

Men and women bring different things to the table. If you're a guy and your career is going badly, good luck getting or keeping a woman. Likewise if you're a woman whose appearance worsened.

[Dawnlind92]

Everyone's appearance "worsens" to an extent with age. Even the most beautiful woman In the world will get wrinkles!

[Pot8o]

Sure. I'm just saying, guys do not have a monopoly on being superficial. Experiments show that women are actually pickier than men when it comes to appearance. I think you have to start from a point where most men in relationships are already dating down, simply because women have more and better options in dating than men do, unless you're one of the handful of high-status men, perhaps.

[Dawnlind92]

One guy said he'd leave his partner if she had breast cancer and it meant she'd need an augmentation! Such a man should be near perfection but he looked like he had down syndrome from the half face pic he'd shown! Genericnamewhatever...

[Dawnlind92]

I agree with that as well. I should have said "people" not just "guys..."

I once hooked up with a man when I was heavier (at the time 155, 5"3) and he felt my belly and told me I needed to loose weight. Although at the time I had larger breasts and he complimented those. Funny thing was at the time this guy was over 300 pounds!

Years later he finds me on Facebook and id lost all the extra fat... and lost my bigger breast (I went from D's to As) he complimented my weight loss but then brought up my formerly large breasts. When I explained to him they had shrunk he didn't believe it till I showed him and he said I should put the weight back on!

[misfittoy]

its not just here shallow people are everywhere. and think about it, those shallow superficial people rarely have the same things they are looking for back, thats the most ironic thing of all. dont lose any sleep over it girl

[Rosexøxø]

lol I mean...

only the single ones who are not getting any will behave that way.

[loveslongnails]

Dawn, you have to keep in mind that answers like that, or to most any subject, fall into a predictable "curve" on a statistical graph. There are extremes on each end, and some folks really ARE like that. However, also keep in mind that some folks post THE most outrageously extreme answers just to get a rise out of people or get attention.

[Berethor]

If a guy is not married and having children with a girl then there is no much binding him to her.

[Dawnlind92]

That I can totally understand.

Initially I understand we all have physical preferences.
If a man prefers to only date tall women, or women only choose to date tall men, that is understandable...

As I said I'm referring to men who say they would leave a beloved girlfriend on her death bed because she needed a mastectomy to save her life (AFTER they dated for some while)...

[Berethor]

They was brutally honest, good thing that they not likely to face that dilemma in real life.

[exitseven]

Most guys are shallow and superficial. It makes sense that some would wash up here.

[Dawnlind92]

Like I mentioned I'm not referring to preferences.

I mentioned breast removal, but another example would be if a man dated a beautiful girl with long hair who ended up getting cancer and requiring chemotherapy to save her life!

The same man then leaves the girl he loves on her death bed as he cannot stand a bald women as much as he loves her...

[exitseven]

I don't know why people can be like that. Everyone had tragedy in their lives. Dumping somebody because they have cancer is one of the worst things I could imagine.

[Dawnlind92]

I agree.

The man who said that admitted he would happily walk away and not feel bad about it as he would no longer he attracted to the girlfriend he once found attractive...

How on earth is that reasonable?

[exitseven]

it is not reasonable to me.

[Luckycharms12]

Shopping filter's image's of the perfect look and body society has take some of the blame. But there will always be shallow and superficial people

[Dawnlind92]

I agree

That said Physical attraction obviously IS important but guys who expect near perfection are superficial.

For example, a guy being attracted to a lady and dating her, but then leaving her because she ended up having oddly shaped breasts or a little cellulite that was not obvious prior to her being naked, despite the fact that she was otherwise very beautiful, smart good sense of humour etc.

That said some women are the same way... in general I wonder how such people end up staying married when everyone ages and their looks fade. There is no prevention of getting old...

[Luckycharms12]

Looks aren't everything we all age. beauty is no one is perfect but together with right person but you can up to perfect.

[Dawnlind92]

One guy said he'd break up with his wife if she had her breasts removed cuz or cancer!

[Luckycharms12]

That man needs help

[Dawnlind92]

No offense to the monster but he didn't look too perfect from the half selfie as his Profile pic

[Dawnlind92]

As I mentioned physical preferences exist and if a man for example prefers huge boobs and does not date women under a certain bra size, I can understand that. Superficial or not we all have preferences
The same could be a woman preferring tall men

I'm referring more to when a partners appearance changes.

For example a man loves his wife's long hair and she ends up with alopecia

As a result she loses hair, and it is out of her control (and just as upsetting to her!)

Then her so called boyfriend breaks up with her as her appearance has changed.

Is this sort of behaviour not cruel and heartless?

[Alcoholic_Wannabe]

I usually hate "you also" arguments. They often go nowhere

But this site is and always has been a lightning rod for shallow people with about as much self-awareness as my fucking asshole.

Best start getting used to it.

[TroyDT]

Who knows? I suspect half of them are 40-year-old virgins living in mommy's basement or garage, guys who wouldn't know what to do is an actual lady were in their lives.

[humanearth]

This website, hahaha that's rich.

Lady, low lifes are everywhere. Not just here

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I consider myself a nice guy and am sorry for the shallow-minded ones.

[DarkWinterNights]

Because it’s what our collapsing amoral society has taught both men and women.

[Dawnlind92]

I'm not going to judge a woman/man for example, who is fit and athletic and requires a partner to be likewise... that is reasonable!

I'm talking about the less than human individuals on here who would for example leave a long term girl friend because she ended up with cancer resulting in a double mastectomy resulting in a removal of both breasts or chemotherapy resulting in hair loss.

Funny thing is judging from profile pics or lack of such monsters don't seem to be too perfect themselves!

[Alex8736]

It comes down to Reality vs Perception.. One specific area I like is when people post a selfie with the hashtag #Nofilter being themselves looking like the girl next door

[Dawnlind92]

@Alex8736 this all said I understand physical attraction being a thing, especially in the beginning. I can understand for example a man preferring thin women, and choosing not to date thick or overweight women, or visa versa. That is reasonable

I'm referring to the type of man who would leave a beautiful woman with long hair he's in love with for a while because for example she ended up with cancer and needed chemotherapy to save her life resulting in hair loss.

Is that not rather cruel and heartless?

[Alex8736]

i know someone who got married and had a baby then within 2 years she posts "oh my god, oh my god my husband suffered a stroke". 2 days later she changed her status to separated and went back to using her maiden name ". shallow

[Jamie05rhs]

I'm pretty sure we're representative of the general population of men. It's just that here you will actually hear people's true and honest thoughts.

[Dawnlind92]

I'm not referring to for example a fit man not wishing to date an overweight woman.

I'm referring to the man who would break up with his long term girlfriend because she ended up with cancer and required breast removal to save her life etc.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Dawnlind92 That would be a low thing to do.

[Dawnlind92]

Like the example I gave... I'm referring to extremes.

I can understand men having a certain type and not being attracted to a certain type, that is reasonable.

I'm referring to like I mentioned, a man who would leave a beloved girlfriend on her death bed because she ended up with breast cancer, and as a result needed a double mastectomy

I feel that kind of behaviour is rather cold and heartless.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Dawnlind92 I completely agree with you.

[Anonymous]

You look at their profile pics...

and wonder if THEY are shallow? 🤔

Tell me more.

[Dawnlind92]

Only after the fact. Otherwise I couldn't care what they look like but when they criticize women for every flaw it makes me wonder how close to perfection these guys are...

[Opinion Owner]

So you have to look like a Greek god to comment on a woman’s appearance?

Don’t tell the beauty industry. They may have a problem.

[Dawnlind92]

You haven't fully understood my question.

I'm not referring to initial attraction. I can understand if a man, or woman has. Physical preferences.

For example, if a man prefers a woman to be of a certain height, or a woman prefers a man to be of a certain height, and dates only those who match their preference that is completely understandable on my part.

I'm referring to after the fact. For example a man has been with a girl he's attracted to physically and emotionally or a while, and she ends up with cancer and as a result needs both breasts removed.

The same man ends up breaking up with her and leaving her in the hospital bed as he can't stand the sight of her no longer having the same breasts.

Whether or not a man or woman is picky or critical in the beginning is not what I'm referring to.

[Zolly99999]

They are everywhere.. girls are just as bad if not worse 😳

[Dawnlind92]

Especially that German guy on my other questions! The one that shows half his face as a profile pic!

[Zolly99999]

It's the way the world has become unfortunately.. there are still some good people out there but you have to look for them..

[Dawnlind92]

Like I said having preferences is normal and totally understandable.

Some men prefer petite women, some women prefer tall men and that is a-ok

I'm referring to the less than humans on this site, who, for example leave their long term girlfriend on their deathbed because she needed a mastectomy (breast removal) to save her life.

That is totally different than a man not being attracted to a woman of a certain height/weight

[Zolly99999]

Yes I agree with you.. that's crappy in my opinion..

[Dawnlind92]

Yeah kind of heartless if that makes sense.

[Zolly99999]

That's the word I was looking for. Yes I agree

[Alex8736]

These are probably the same ignorant lib-tards who preach the exact opposite as long as it doesn't affect them.

[Anonymous]

Ehh it is not always like that you just look at the wrong side of the glass sort of

[stargazeraug1989]

Shallow in what respect?

[Dawnlind92]

For example guys who would have their partner ask for permission before cutting her hair a few inches, leave a girl with cellulite or break up with a girl if she had her breasts removed to save her life because of cancer.

[EaterPeter]

Sorry babe. On behalf of all of them and myself.

[Dawnlind92]

Actually I wasn't referring to yours at all being honest is one thing yes we all have things we are attracted to and not I'm referring to the Individuals on here that are extremely shallow in every way. For example a guy who would leave his wife or long term partner due to a change in her appearance that was inevitably due to health complications: such as cancer, alopecia etc.
Having everyday preferences is not at all like that yours are fine.

[EaterPeter]

Thanks

[Dawnlind92]

Having preferences is one thing. Marrying someone and leaving her cuz she ended up with cancer is another.

[EaterPeter]

Right

[EaterPeter]

Hospitalization and meds have capacity to turn anyone into less tolerable person.

[Dawnlind92]

True that.

[jjj101010]

Possibly just a reflection on life

[LemiaOfThunder]

Self titlement