Over it after 5 long years?

[Misspink8]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. Over the years he has not been very thoughtful with gifts etc. he even asked me when my birthday was because he said he forgot the “exact date”. I have to bitxh for flowers even every now and then before he will actually do it. My question is what makes men stop putting the effort in? I’m ready to pull the plug on this as I feel I’m wasting my time ! What will it take ! Seeing me with someone else ! I’m at my wits end here

[Messianic_Monk]

First thing to do is make sure you're doing your part. It can be easy to criticize someone and not recognize your part (been guilty of this myself).

If you've established that you're doing your part, ask him what is going on. He might want to break up with you for all you know. Communicate.

If you've established that you're not doing your part then talk with your partner and tell him that you feel like you haven't done your part and are going to do something about it (and actually do it). Maybe he's waiting for you to do something 🤷 if after this he's still uninterested then do the above thing.

Course, you don't know what's going on in his mind. He could be going through a bout of depression... he might have a pornography addiction... whatever it may be. Try to help him. I'm all for partners helping each other out. However... if the other isn't willing to put in the work to show appreciation for that support then I am in full support of one party walking away (unless they're in a marriage. In which case there are certain things that must be fulfilled in order for grounds for a biblical divorce to occur).

[spartan55]

Are you putting the effort in?

[bowenw]

It seems like he's just not interested.