Why do only older men seem to hit on me?

[Anonymous]

So I'm currently studying overseas and I'd like to date someone but none of the guys my age seem to be interested in me. But I always get hit on by older men, they call me beautiful, flirt with me or ask for my socials. I would like to date a guy closer to my age, 30 at the oldest. Thoughts?

Updates

+1 y

I'm 22 by the way

[slatyb]

"None of they guys my age seem to be interested in me..." Maybe they are intimidated in some way, and don't hit on you because they feel that you would be unlikely to be interested in them.

If you are attracted to someone, just ask them out yourself.

[Asker]

Maybe I should 💀, it's the fear of rejection that stops me 🫠

[slatyb]

That's what stops them too. So what if you are rejected? Then ask someone else.

[Asker]

Yea you're right, I'll do that, thanks!

[inhua]

another "I got options but I don't like my options" dilemma

the factor they're being judged upon is outside of their control, something they didn't choose

[BoopBoopBeep]

Age differences are less of a concern overseas. If they see you as a woman of value they'll flirt with you.

[mommymommymommy]

It's not a good idea to start getting involved, if you're paying money to study OVERSEAS

[Asker]

🥲 yes ma'am 🫡

[BarryLiverstone]

You said what the older guys do. What do the younger men do?

[Asker]

Nothing... that's the problem 💀. I mean some guys smile at me but that's about it. Should I just assume that I'm not attractive to guys my age here or what?

[BarryLiverstone]

Girls that I was attracted to when I was 18 and girls I see as pretty at age 24 haven’t really changed much. So no I don’t believe guys will radically change their judgements in only a few years. When the guys smile do you approach them?

[Asker]

No...🥲

[BarryLiverstone]

Why not?

[Asker]

Fear of rejection 💀

[BarryLiverstone]

Time to get over that. All the guys who are giving you compliments have been rejected.

[Asker]

You've got a point there 💀

[Asker]

Thanks for your insight

[BarryLiverstone]

You are welcome. Do you feel like you are pretty? Self confidence is attractive

[Asker]

I wouldn't be questioning here if I did 🫠

[BarryLiverstone]

That’s rough :( so even with positive feedback from lots of guys you still don’t feel good about how you look. Any reason why?

[Asker]

Its complicated. I wouldn't say the feedback I've gotten is positive. Some of these men look old enough to be my dad so it's weird

[BarryLiverstone]

Whoa. That’s creepy ngl.

[BarryLiverstone]

What feedback did you get?

[Asker]

Nothing that's considered harassment ofcourse, for example if I'm shopping and an older man would strike up a conversation with me and u can tell from the vibe you know. But when I show no interest they go away.

[BarryLiverstone]

Glad they go away. If you are shopping he may be bored for all you know lol. But I will say I’m more likely to strike up a conversation in that scene with a stranger then I was 10 years ago. So maybe as people get older they are more outgoing?

[Asker]

I guess so, I'll try approaching guys my age and see if it works out well! Thanks again :)

[BarryLiverstone]

You are welcome. Here is your homework, ask 5 new guys for their socials this week. And expect to get rejected.. (you likely will get their socials )

[Asker]

Haha sounds like a plan, I'll let you know how that goes! 💛

[BarryLiverstone]

Promise? Lol you better

[Asker]

Yup I like myself a challenge 😂

[QuietRunner]

overseas it is an older guy thing

in the USA 18 year old guys want all women

[In_Trance]

Must be something you're saying or doing

[Anonymous]

That you flirt with older men.