Why didn’t he make much eye contact with me during our first date?

[Anonymous]

Was I really that ugly to him?

[Anonymous]

You’re unnecessarily hard on yourself. If you found him through a dating app I would say not to use them anymore, otherwise you will always go through this, that fear of what the first impression IRL is like and to me it’s far too taxing.

[kakaling]

I look into the eye to someone I have no interest in.

I look into the eye to someone I fall in love with.

I look into the eye to someone I am interested in that is afraid looking at me.

I tends to not look into the eye to someone I am interested in that is looking at me with a powerful stare.

[Asker]

I wasn’t staring at him at all

[kakaling]

Every guy is different. Message him list of different situations, ask him to fill up the form, lol.

[Asker]

He was talking a lot etc wouldn’t he end date shortly since it was coffee date? Our date lasted for 1,5 hours. Also not once did I saw him drinking his tea ( by the way he already ordered before I got there and drinked half of his drink when I got there)

[kakaling]

I fall in love deeply before, its hard for me to look into another eye, and feelings is toward the other person.

[BarryLiverstone]

Die he make eye contact when you met him prior to the date?

[Asker]

We met through oline

[Asker]

Online*

[BarryLiverstone]

Oh then if you met online he may not have seen you as attractive irl. When is your next date?

[Asker]

If he wasn’t attracted to me why not look me in the eyes like every other person?

[BarryLiverstone]

Because he was on a date so he is expected to have a romantic attention to you. Others are not expected to act the same

[Asker]

So he rather not look at me at all?

[BarryLiverstone]

For example had he focused on you
More and done small actions to show interest then wouldn’t you feel like he liked you more?

Others wouldn’t do all that as they are not meeting you from an app

[Asker]

He was talking a lot etc wouldn’t he end date shortly since it was coffee date? Our date lasyed for 1,5 hours. Also not once did I saw him drinking his tea ( by the way he already ordered before I got there and drinked half of his drink when I got there)

[BarryLiverstone]

So I wasn’t on the date to know what he was thinking. You tell me, why did he act as he acted? Also did he ask you out for date #2?

[Asker]

There was no second date. He told me our future plans don’t align and for. I asked him what plans didn’t align he said ”our goals just in general level don’t align ”
That’s why I’m confused about his behaviour

[Asker]

At the end of the date he told me “ let’s keep in contact “

[BarryLiverstone]

Oh ok. But didn’t you ask about this before?

[Asker]

No I haven’t. What do you think about his behavior?

[BarryLiverstone]

Seems like he is dating multiple people. How long ago was this?

[Asker]

Why do you think he was dating multiple people? It was almost 6 weeks ago

[BarryLiverstone]

Because he wanted to keep in touch and didn’t ghost you. So he now sees you as an option.

Oh 6 weeks ago? Best to forget about him and find someone else

[Asker]

What shows he wanted to keep in touch? I was the one that reached out first after the date

[Asker]

Do you think he was genuine about not wanting to continue because of our different life goals?

[BarryLiverstone]

Yep.

[Asker]

Why do you think so?

[BarryLiverstone]

Because he didn’t arrange another date

[Asker]

I mean the reason he gave me

[BarryLiverstone]

The reason he gave you wasn’t fully truthful. But I told you that the last time you asked about him. Ty, good luck

[Asker]

Why do you think it wasn’t truthful?

[BarryLiverstone]

Goodbye :)

[California_Poppy]

Maybe he's just nervous or on the spectrum

[Asker]

Is that the only explanation?

[California_Poppy]

No. But I think that is probably more likely then him just thinking your ugly.

I'm genuinely asking... Why do you think that? Is there something you are insecure about?

[Asker]

There was no second date. He told me our future plans don’t align and for. I asked him what plans didn’t align he said ”our goals just in general level don’t align ”
That’s why I’m confused about his behaviour. At the end of the date he even told me “ let’s keep in contact “

[California_Poppy]

I wouldn't be so hard on yourself. Not everyone is a match. It sucks when you really like someone, but that's just life.
It's possible he is just saying that to be nice (or to not be mean) or maybe he means it - maybe your goals DON'T actually align. It's hard to say. But I wouldn't pry him to much about it. It's rare that someone will actually tell you the exact reason they don't want to date you.

But it is OKAY. Don't let it get you down. And in the mean time, work on building your self confidence. Guys dig a confident woman who is comfortable with who she is.

I don't know what you look like but if you are dating online and you think someone might be surprised about how you look in person, just try to open about what you look like before meeting. Avoid excessive filters or angles that might make you look drastically different.
That way when someone agrees to go on a date with you, you can feel better knowing that they like you for who you are and how you look.

[Anonymous]

We always think it's about us.

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[Tomisworthless]

Quite possible

[MaximusIV]

Yes, you're right.

[Asker]

Why do you think so?

[Wise4myage]

Maybe he’s just shy?

[Asker]

Is that the only explanation?

[Wise4myage]

That I can think of.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆

[Asker]

What?

[Opinion Owner]

Just taking one thing and using it to justify something you feel. Don't do that.

[Asker]

So what was it about then in your opinion?

[Opinion Owner]

Could be a million things could be what you said but it could just as easily Bern he was nervous or that you stared to much at him. My younger self would have been the type to avoid eye contact. Now I'm quite the opposite. Sometimes so much that I have to be cognizant that looking them in the eye makes some people uncomfortable. But I do it because I see it as respectful, it says I'm listening to you and you have my attention.
Don't go off just this one thing hun.