Is it okay for my boyfriend to say "you can't do anything in your career" to take me out of my laziness. I literally cried due to it n felt attacked?

[Anonymous]

[Adam1978]

Of course you can't. Your career doesn't impact his actions. So obviously it won't change them. How can a truth make you feel attacked? He most be motivated himself and you going out doing stuff is clearly not the way to motivate him. It can actually discourage, since the more you do the less he needs to do. Giving him more room to be lazy.

[Asker]

I couldn't understand clearly what you said. Will you explain it more clearly?

[Adam1978]

What you do in your career is irrelevant to him. It does give him anything but less time with you. So why would he put in more effort if he get less out of it.

[Wise4myage]

He sounds like a real jerk.

[spartan55]

Again, where do you girls find these complete fuckheads? I mean really? What a dick.

[slatyb]

No, that's not ok, not at all.

[Asker]

what should be done now?

[slatyb]

You should find a nicer boyfriend -- someone who builds you up instead of tearing you down.

[MementoMori777]

why did he say it?

[Asker]

He said he was motivating me by hurting my ego so that I can learn skills and get job quicker. But that attacked my confidence

[Asker]

It felt somewhat like criticism

[MementoMori777]

well at least he tried to help, his heart was in the right place but he was being rude, tell him that doesn't motivate you, if anything it demotivated you and see if it changes

[strateguy632]

okay? when is it not "okay" to say an opinion?

[gothbxtch]

no he sounds like a dick