Boyfriend said we were going to play Xbox last night then never called. Why don't guys update when plans change?

[Anonymous]

*He then gets on at like midnight.

*We're long distance so this is one way we stay connected.

---I'm just upset that instead of ignoring me, he could've been like, sorry plans changed.

[NamerOfStars]

That's a pity. Do you know what- specifically- happened? It may have been as simple as 1. something comes up that will take a few minutes to resolve; fast enough that it's not worth bothering you about. 2. it changes, and will take slightly longer. 3+ repeat step two for several hours.

At any rate, telling him something like "Hey, if you get delayed- even if it's going to be brief- could you let me know, so I'm not stuck waiting?". That's a pretty reasonable request, and should get your point across without putting him on the defensive.

[BoopBoopBeep]

That's garbage. I used to play HALO with my ex... even when we were fighting you don't mess up gaming plans, you just don't sit together either.

Seriously ask him wtf. Do it nicer than that, but stern enough to let him know that was inconsiderate and isn't appropriate for a relationship, as there are ample opportunities and methods to communicate if plans changed.

[Asker]

I take game night as date night. It may sound ridiculous to others, but to each his own and to us, this meant something. It was more of the fact that he 1) didn't just call or text and say hey i got busy, plans changed, we'll game tomorrow, etc. 2) that he still got on and didn't think i'd notice!

[BoopBoopBeep]

It's absolutely date night.
1) is inexcusable if there isn't a hospital visit because it's 2023 and we have comms devices all over the place
2) is insulting my intelligence or showing that there's just zero thought put into me

I'm really sorry.

[CurrentJohn]

You have good reasons to be upset, but have you asked him why he didn`t inform you? Maybe he just forgot about it, something came inbetween etc.

If that is the case then sure it sucks but that can happen, we are all just humans. If we didn`t bother updating you on purpose and knowingly left you hanging, you should question your relationship. But before that, just talk about it first with him, because only he can give you that answer.

[CurrentJohn]

If *he didn`t bother updating you

[Danny_dan92]

How unfortunate

[Anonymous]

You deserve better