Married coworker switches between flirting and ignoring me?

[Anonymous]

He's older then me and married. We get along well: we work well together, we think in a similar way, we've got a similar sense of humor.

I am nearly 100% sure he has been flirting with me the past months: he lighlty played footsie with me a couple of times, he pressed his knee on mine while sitting next to each other (in both cases, I did not move away), he calls me to tell me stuff even if not necessary.

Then, after clearly (?) flirting he switches to completely ignore me.

I like him. I've been looking at him in a discreet from day 1 and I think he knows.

Some info about his personality: he in general switches from being very nice and fun to being very cold. He's got a strong personality and can be hard sometimes, but I'd also say he can be very sensitive underneath the surface. I really have a gut feeling that he likes me. There's other men at work being kind and asking about me, but I've never felt like any of them was flirting. What do you guys think about It? Why is he behaving this way?

thanks

[Anonymous]

I’m married. A coworker and I flirted, tried being friends, fell in love and well, let’s just say this sort of thing never works. I ended it before we slept together but it was going there. She quit her job. It was a mess

I likewise ignored my coworker because I’m married. But she would get insecure and come by my office with gifts or food. I’d feel bad and return her gesture and the relationship kept going

In the end I learned if I truly love her, it wasn’t fair to keep holding on. If I truly love my wife, I’d step my foot down and make my stand. Sure, my coworker made me very happy. My wife and I were having marriage issues at the time.

But ultimately love…. is letting go. Not just of the other person, but of YOURSELF. Letting go of what YOU want. Is your selfish desire to feel attracted to this man more important than damaging a family? Hurting multiple people? Is your self esteem sufficiently low enough to think an unavailable man is a viable conquest? Think big picture. Think what you can do to make it better

[Avicenna]

Just keep it professional with him if you don’t want to make a complaint for sexual harassment. Most likely he wants sex.

[etsylo]

on and off might indicate something more going on with him. people don't just switch on and off unless they have a situation going on within themselves or if they have a mental condition that needs attention.

he's also married and him flirting with you in his own way is very disrespectful to his partner who probably doesn't know about it. that really really sucks.

[Anonymous]

I'm in a similar situation. A guy thats been flirting with me is engaged. We went this week and he was touching me and stuff. He was talking about me a lot at our work do.

Really don't know what to do about it. If he dumped his fiance, I'd go out with him. Don't know what he's thinking about me.

[DermalPunch]

Henis a man struggling with tempatation. Leave him alone. Don't be that chick. He isn't running off into the sunset with you. You'd be an itch at most.

[Paris13]

Red Flag on This One, hun... He is Married!!! Be Civil at Work, No Flirt. xxoo

[ProbablyClueless]

Sounds like he's just having fun. He's not flirting with you because he's interested in you. He's flirting with you because it's fun to flirt.

[WhitneySnow]

He’s playing hot and cold. It’s a way for players to attract girls.

[Iron_Man]

He’s married don’t get involved

[Asker]

The fact that I'd like to understand more doesn't mean I'll get involved. This kind of judging answer Is just awful.

[Iron_Man]

You’re heading down the wrong path you’re gonna start getting attached. It’s better to let it out.

[Iron_Man]

I mean, let it go

[HouseMoat]

Please leave well enough alone