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Here's an analogy: A museum open to the public. In the museum is a statue of the goddess Aphrodite. But at the entrance of the museum, there are two officers with blinders that they hand out to any male who enters. They wrap a blood pressure monitor on his arm. The monitor is linked to an app on their phone and if it goes off within the proximity of the display, the officers arrest and drag off the guilty man.
That's how ridiculous the idea of controlling this is (that's not directed at you, Hawk; I'm sure you get the point of what I mean). A world-class view, but don't look, guys. The nerve! You are not allowed to look at someone dressed for attention in public because you should know they don't want you to look even though it looks like they do.
Women are beautiful to men in general. If they dress to attract, they should be prepared to get attention from not only the good-looking guys, but also guys they may not find attractive. That, I think, is the distinction.
The one thing I'd say is that women should be able to tell guys "No, I'm not interested in you" and be believed. The area where an obvious line is drawn is that her dressing to attract does not then justify rape. That's another topic, though, and one I'll leave alone for the moment.
Well said as always Ms. Potts đđŒ
And no need to mention you're not directing anything towards me. I don't post my questions because I'm looking for answers to help come to my own conclusion. I'm always pretty set in my opinion before posting these. I'm just always curious how others opinions compare with my own.
Here's the video link that inspired this post:
www.instagram.com/.../?igsh=ZmFsM3M2cjNucDlx
Brilliant reply Potts!!
Dress how you wish people to view you. If you want to dress as a slut, people will look at you as a slut and you don't get to complain.
Men will always stare, women will too. Dress how you want, but don't complain.
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disagree, why should men be penalized for admiring an attractive woman when its perfectly alright for a woman to stare at a sexy man? if women don't like it then they should not do it because they are no better than the men they're complaining about. If a girl is dressed to impress doesn't she get mad if men don't notice her, else why is she dressed that way, if not to get attention? Don't women wear make-up to improve their appearance to get men to notice them? If you truly don't want a mans attention then you can dress down, forgo the make-up and cover yourself so nothing is showing that could entice a man to notice you. Just don't get mad and slam men when they ignore you and/or walk past if you like your invisible, especially if you need help with something. Isn't that after all what you wanted? When I was working out at a gym, women stared at me all the time but I expected that, Its just the way the world works. I was happy that my effort to improve my image was working. If I didn't want the attention then I would've stayed home and ate popcorn while sipping on a malt. Be careful of what you wish for, it may not turn out as you expect it to.
What would those who think that staring shouldn't be allowed do about it? Arrest people for staring?
Next they will be arresting people for thinking about things that others don't approve of.
Men staring at women is a powerful natural instinct. In order for the species to survive men have to be visually stimulated. It's part of the reproductive process. We should be thankful for it because it's one of the reasons we are here today to talk about it.
But regardless, where your eyes gaze is your business and no one else's no matter how offensive others may find it.
Well said đđŒ
âAllowedâ? Eyeballs are eyeballs. Unless youâre planning to blind everyone just to wear something inappropriate the looking wonât stop. Itâs the catcalling and corresponding harassment that should be addressed â though if you consider all or some of this to be unwanted attention you should also take responsibility for what youâre wearing.
How about you shut the hell up.
It's a shame you yourself as a woman you are making this statements.
Ridiculous!
@Pinkkandgirly What about what she said was incorrect?
Hawk WOMAN MUST FEEL EMPOWER AMD FREE DRESS HOW THEY WANT!
@Pinkandgirly I'm not saying anything against dressing how you want.
But let me give you an example:
If you go nude, you expect no one should look at you?
@HawkPerception, âstupid is as stupid doesâ so if @Pinkandgirly wants to be a troll thatâs her prerogative, though it doesnât mean I have to tolerate it. Donât feed the trollsâŠ.
@Pinkandgirly you're lucky that your spitting sh*t behind your screen against this respectful woman @DishLady , if i was there and you said this to her in front of me, you'd be slapped on your face to make your mouth swell before disrespecting someone who was just trying to give their peaceful opinion!
You're really lucky!
Women stare at guys all the time, like âhey that ones cute, you thinking of asking him out?â(in private with a gal pal saying it very quietly)
We can talk about appropriate ways to stare, approach, and ask out a girl however to flat out pretend that humans regardless of sex/gender/orientation donât get attracted and fall in love / find people sexy is dumb. Normalize good behavior and non abusive, to flat out remove from equation isnât going to help anybody. Iâve met a lot of young girls in my MS / HS days who would harass, peak, and never take no for an answer when it came to guys. There needs to be lessons on appropriate behavior, turning that attraction into a positive reaction, not a negative where you make the person feel uncomfortable/threatened/creeped the F out. Just my opinion.
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How do you define "stare," how do you measure it to know when a man is staring, and what is the penalty for a man staring at a woman? And does the same law apply to a woman staring at a man? Does it apply to a man staring at a woman who is a cheerleader on the sidelines at a football game? A model walking down a runway?
Staring in general is a bit much but there's nothing wrong with the opposite sex checking eachother out. Catcalling is when it starts going overboard but thats never bothered me. Im flattered
@DizzyDesii making note that catcalling flatters youâŠ.. would that be Siamese or Persian? lol.
@nawtee_me we are siamese if you please
Can we please stop criminalizing the male libido. Women, sorry we find you attractive and like looking at you, even when you don't find us attractive. This is not to say you should tolerate assault or inappropriate comments, but for Goddess sake, "Donât even look at me!"
The only thing girls hate that being objectified is not being objectified.

People are gonna stare if you wear something revealing, whether you like it or not. If you don't want them seeing you as a slut, then don't dress like a slut. If you do dress like one and they treat you like one, then you have no right to complain.
i love to wear a minidress and dont mind guys looking but your not a slut if you wear one
Looking is just looking; if a woman is actually harmed by that, exposure to anything that's genuinely harmful would probably kill her, and she needs to toughen up.
Well said
How do you propose to stop that? People like to look at what they like to look at! Looking doesn't hurt anything! The best you can possibly hope for is that, when people have kids, they teach them not to do that sort of stuff.
Okay. And?
What about lesbian women that stare?
I liked your opinion. That should tell you enough. I just linked the video to share the inspiration for the question. So far, we only have one crazy in the opinions.
In that video, that girl's very pretty and she's got great tits that bounce around a lot when she TALKS! I can't speak for other guys but, for me, it's great fun to watch them bounce around like that. We don't know why, we just love to see that! But, for me, after I've seen it for a while, I just don't look, anymore. It's like someone telling you a VERY funny joke over and over again. You'll laugh your ass off at it the first 2 or 3 times but then, the more you hear it, the less funny it is. although, unlike that joke, I DO need booster shots every so often.
Also, for me, I'm not staring for sexual reasons, for the most part. I'm staring because of how beautiful they are. I really wouldn't mind having a pair of my own!! Call it tit envy, if you like.
Still, no matter WHAT you do or say, in the first place, it's been said millions of times before by millions of women over millions of years but guy ARE gonna stare!! It's NATURE!! If a stick with tits walked into the room, we'd stare!! We don't know why! It's probably the same as how girls go nuts over muscleheads. You never hear any guys complaining about that, do you?
I'm 6' 9"! People stare at me all the time! It doesn't bother me in the slightest! Maybe if you'd just think of having tits as a kind of bodily normality. (I had a much better word for it `til it came time to type it). I'm this tall and there's not a damn thing I can do about it so, I just live my life as a tall guy. If people stare, they stare! So what? You've got tits and, other than hiding, binding or cutting them off, there's not a damned thing YOU can do about them! They just grew that way because of the chemicals in YOUR body and you just have to live with it. It's no different than you being a blonde, a midget being a midget or a blind person being blind. You think THEY don't get stared at, too? You have what attributes you have just live with it and don't worry about how others see it. If people stare, so what?
Another aspect of it I just recalled from psychology class: the eye will automatically go to movement or anything white/bright. It's actually a part of self-preservation.
if i wear a minidress and men don't look id be worried
@nawtee_me good to know that
If I dress sexy or provocatively I want men to notice me😈. If I want to be left alone I will wear something that doesnât Canât really blame a guy for looking. But I like guys looking
If someone, man or woman, sees something nice to look at, they should be allowed to look. Staring with googly eyes might be a bit much, but it shouldn't be illegal.
it's not horrible having a guy look at your legs
As a libertarian, i think everyone should be able to do whatever they want as long as they arenât hurting someone else or taking something away from them.
It doesnât hurt to look. Doesnât even hurt to stare. Even wolf whistling never hurt anyone.
Nobody gets to tell you what you are allowed to do unless it's illegal
Should it ever become illegal?
Staring? Naah that's too much
Also considering how many women falsely brand men at Gyms as creepos for glancing them for a second, lot of women are going to exploit it
Womenâs form is like a work of art. If we cannot gaze at this beautiful art form then life isnât worth living.
Now letâs be real⊠sexy short skirts, makeup, tight blouses are all to catch menâs eye⊠maybe they want a specific man or group of men but sorry⊠all men will look (unless they are gay).
@BadApple69 simp
Iâm guessing you have no idea what that term âsimpâ meansâŠ. Doesnât fit here little girl.
He should try not to Stare maybe , I honestly keep thinking of that and I get to the point where I condemned both men and women for it , sometimes girls doesn't really gives you a choice while walking almost naked and from our side some men too will hunt women with their eyes as long as she smells like a women no clothes specifications needed , lol I get a brother who keeps staring at every single girl he smell , the point he almost convince me he had an X-ray vision ! And I had too a female friend of mine that still doesn't know about bra apparently! I swear when ever I met her winter was it or summer she literally almost naked like 3 pieces of clothes per maximum maybe for if we include shoes
If you are out in "public" people can look at you all they want so long as you aren't locked in some sort of private area like a bathroom stall or dressing room. If you want privacy, the best thing to do is go to "private" property like your house.
Who says what men are "allowed" to do
I'm always surprised at the amount of men who have opinions on behavior that is none of their business. Like so ! such else in re. etiquette something done subtly & with discretion allows a small degree of breeding common courtesy. I suggest not grabbing your crotch at the same time, that is both behind the pale of discretion and subtlety.
I don't know how men are ok with staring because I'm worried about a woman just catching me doing a quick glance lol but men can look at whatever they want. It isn't cool to stare and it's kind of pathetic, but it shouldn't be illegal.
Itâs rude to stare, but they are free to do so. I try not to stare myself, but I often overthink and it becomes much like trying not to think of a blue elephant.
Allowed? It may be considered impolite but it can hardly be made illegal.
You're a man. As long as she isn't underage, look at whatever the hell you want to look at unashamedly. If you have to ASK women if it's okay to look at them, you're already behind the eight ball on this one.
Some women could wear a bikini and no man would stare. Another woman could wear a snow suit and men would line up to watch her walk past. The clothing is almost irrelevant to whether men will stare or not for those women me will stare at.
Women who obviously dress to draw attention to themselves forfeit their right to not get that attention.
Itâs natural for men to look at women. Unless theyâre a creep, thereâs no issue here.
Look don't stare, staring is rude and aggressive staring is threatening.
If I stare at you, will you call the cops?
Yeah
I'm sure they'll care đ
There's no harm in staring. Seen plenty of women do the same thing to a jacked guy at the gym who's shirtless or wearing a tight t-shirt
Nobody should be creepily staring at anyone regardless of clothes
Should it be illegal to stare?
@Nirmroth You don't have to apologize to me. I believe it's anyone's right to look at whatever they want. If someone dresses a certain way that grabs more attention, that's on them.
However, never say never. With the advancements of AI and loss of privacy with all the cameras and video recording everywhere, there may eventually be a ridiculous law that prevents people from even looking at others.
Unless it's in a private setting, we're allowed to use our eyes as we like.
I will say never its just not realistic no one would accept having it tracked then ofc you have the issues that were stuck in biological bodies with human brains. there's enough thirst trap challenges on yt were youtubers use an eye tracker and challenge themselves to not look at cleavages and the like. Its Impossible there's always a glance.
@Apple1996 You're proud of that? Do you realize how psychotic you sound? Anyone is free to look at whatever they want, even if they're creepy and stare. Even catcalling, while not classy is fine.
The only time it gets out of hand is when things get physical or someone tries to lay hands on you. At that point it's harassment.
Definitely proud of protecting my kids from creeps. And nah kids and pregnant women are extremely vulnerable. Prone to being kidnapped and murdered. I would never agree to allowing someone to freely creep on that specific group of vulnerable people.
It's pretty weird you think that should be okay/normalized
@Apple1996 At no point in this conversation or post did I mention or imply that it should be normalized. I don't stare at anyone myself.
All I'm saying is that girls that think they're entitled to tell people to not look at them regardless of what they're wearing are ridiculous, delusional, and likely psychotic.
By the way having your husband beating some kids for looking at you for too long is absolutely psychotic and low IQ bully behaviour. The fact that you're proud of that just shows you're low IQ yourself.
Women are not entitled to do that at all and you're just proving more and more that you're delusional.
And unless he was following you around, and staring at you, he did nothing wrong. He did nothing to jeopardize your "safety" for you to need protection.
www.laharassmentfirm.com/.../
It's literally harassment depending on the type pf staring
I see no problem with telling people their stare makes you uncomfortable. Just the background matters if I am just gazing off with no focus it would be weird if I were to be approached by an angry man or mother.
Likewise I think punishing people for staring would be over the top of an reaction. I myself love to stare at people outside a bus window or Café without any malice thoughts just observing
It's boys being boys (even 70-year-old "boys") so girls, don't bop and bounce about braless-especially you buxom broads- and/or really short/tight cut-offs or skirts if you don't want us lads' looks.
No u canât stop people from looking in public places
Did you just remove Shitinsta Amy said?
I don't need AI on my posts.
That's crazy. Beauty is to be admired in music, art, poetry, why would a woman and her dress be any different?
If you feel uncomfortable being stared at dress differently. Society doesn't have to conform for an individuals feelings.
People need to watch the YouTube videos of body builders shirtless in public. It's definitely a double standard.
Allowed? How can you stop people from looking or staring? A girl can dress however she wants but to say people canât react how they want to it is asinine
let's say you shouldn't expect privacy and nobody looking at you when you're in public.
"Should not be allowed" How? Criminalize looking?
What do you mean by "not allowed" like it's legally enforced?
For real? 🤣🤣
Not allowed to stare! I'll simply answer that i'll look wherever i want!
Staring is not an allow or not sort of thing. Now catcalling should not be allowed.
Disagree. I'll glance as I please 😉🥺
Staring is rude.
So should you call the cops for being stared at? Or can you get over it?
That's Ridiculous
Staring at anybody is rude.
Does it hurt your feelings?
RESPECT WOMAN!
2nd.
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