Men, what makes you want to act like a gentleman around woman?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I’ve been lucky with a lot of men being very chivalrous around me, which I like a lot.

Like this one time recently, I thought this man pulled out a chair for me in the restaurant to sit down and I thanked him and he graced me to sit, only to find out that he was sitting himself but gave me the seat…

Then they approached us, we had a wonderful conversation for 4-5 hours. They were holding umbrellas for us while our friends were taking photos.

They invited us on drinks.

One of them gave me his jacket to sit on it so that my dress wouldn’t get wet in rain.

Then they went to pay for our table, only to figure out, another group of men paid for us, because they were from Georgia and saw us there.

They sang to us and all.

They accompanied us to the car and opened the doors for us.

I wonder now, what’s something I do, that makes men want to do those sweet little gestures?

Because , my friend told me those things don’t happen when they go out alone without me , they happen when I go with them, even though, my friends are by far much much prettier than me.

[DishLady]

Gentlemen are usually raised with good manners -- or actively WANT to be gentlemen and acquire the good manners by asking friends, reading up on etiquette, etc. Additionally, affirmation of good manners by others (particularly women) helps to reinforce the good behavior and motivates the person to continue acting like a gentleman. Lastly, interest in a particular person (either on the surface/visual level or on a deeper/emotional level) prompts a guy to be chivalrous, gentle, tender, etc. which are all linked to gentlemanly behavior.

[Nikki1989]

Real men don't't have to try. They are naturally that way.

[MrOracle]

You probably seem feminine and you don't give off Feminist vibes. When a woman is feminine, it makes men (the ones raised with traditional values) want to act like a gentleman. When women come across as feminist or liberal/leftist, men tend to ignore them if they aren't trying to get sex from them. Feminists screaming at them for opening doors or pulling out chairs or even daring to talk to them are responsible for that.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

Truth, but I'd argue that as men, we lead - we don't follow.

When there are those that demand hatred, we shouldn't return it, we should let them stew in it. Letting our good graces slip because others treat us poorly when we perform these good manners is giving those that hate us control over us. If I were on a date and a woman was insulted by my good manners, then I'd slam the door shut before she could go through, turn around without saying a word (I'm not going to give her the satisfaction of getting a rise out of me), and go home. Let her independence find her own way home; I'm not going to be treated like that for being nice to someone. According to the Golden Rule, the only exchange in that process was my being nice to you affords you the right to be nice to me. If you broke that by being a total @ss, I know I now have been given the right to treat you likewise, but I'll do it passive aggressively. You've said far too much for me to add more on top. I will continue to be nice to all women, and choose the right one who respects me in kind. But make a statement that you're insulted for my walking on the streetside, holding a door, or pulling out a char, or think I'm just trying to get in your pants because I'm doing these things, or accuse me of an act, we're over and done - we've spent too much time in this life together, and I want to immediately exit. Your number is blocked, any app contact is blocked, I've swiped left, and you are a bad story I talk about with my friends.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

As a feminist, myself, I don't hate feminists (I think that term is far misused). I do hate sharing the presence of man-haters; on the internet, phone, in person, etc. Often when I hear the word 'feminazi', it isn't against the true causes - very valid ones - of feminists; it's against the man-hating people hiding behind the shield of feminism. Even feminists are starting to see this for what it is.
As far as the liberal/ leftist comment... correcting that diverts the point of the OP's thread, so I end that political trap before I dare to fall into it.
For the most part, I agree with your comment. I think your paradigm is a bit misguided, but overall, you are stating valid points.

[MrOracle]

Feminism is a female superiority movement. Look up speeches given by the leaders of the Feminist movement - the ones who set policy that is pushed through the government and through corporate HR departments, and that cannot be denied.

If you call yourself a Feminist, that's what you are associating yourself with - the positions taken by the leadership. Make sure you know exactly what they advocate before you claim them.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

I deny that (and you thought it couldn't be denied).

I am associating myself in giving choice to how a woman uses her body and leaving governments (mostly men) out of it.
I am associating myself with closing the wage gap, and making hiring decisions without a regard to sexual profiling.
I am associating myself with not treating women like objects for a man's unrestricted judgement or vocalized lecherous perversions.
I am associating myself with abolishing gender stereotypes, expectations, and establishing the better treatments of our mothers, grandmothers, sisters, aunts, girlfriends, wives, and female friends and cousins.

These are the facts of feminism; spoken by a feminist, not the fallacy of those outside looking in with complete bias and prejudice. I'm both sorry you can't realize that, and that the idea of sexual harassment in the workplace is such a problem for someone with your regard to its intentions.

[MrOracle]

@Wolf_Thunderspirit

"I am associating myself in giving choice to how a woman uses her body and leaving governments (mostly men) out of it."
'
That's great - UNTIL there's another life involved. That's the inconvenient part you left out.

"I am associating myself with closing the wage gap, and making hiring decisions without a regard to sexual profiling."

There's no wage gap. There's only women making different choices from men. The "wage gap" has been thoroughly debunked. Women who do the same (or better) work than men in a given job are paid the same (or better) than men - and there are plenty of examples. But MOST women CHOOSE career paths that don't pay as well. Less than 15% of STEM graduates are women, despite a tremendous effort and free scholarships to get more women into STEM. Most women simply don't want to do the work. Go anywhere that you can find 1000 women in their early 20s and ask them if the pursued a STEM degree in college, and you'll see that very few did. That's why there is a DIFFERENCE in pay, but that's not a "wage gap", it's a choice gap.

[MrOracle]

"I am associating myself with not treating women like objects for a man's unrestricted judgement or vocalized lecherous perversions."

That's been illegal for a long time, and I'm pretty sure EVERYONE supports this.

"I am associating myself with abolishing gender stereotypes, expectations, and establishing the better treatments of our mothers, grandmothers, sisters, aunts, girlfriends, wives, and female friends and cousins."

Gender stereotypes exist because they're based in truth. Men and women are DIFFERENT. That's a GOOD thing. Women absolutely do NOT want EQUAL treatment as men - in fact, the abjectly HATE being treated like a man - except for a relative handful of activists. Go ask 100 women if they want to be treated like a man, and most will say "hell no."

Feminists want the PRIVILEGES that men enjoy, but WITHOUT the RESPONSIBILITIES that come with those privileges - and THAT is what makes Feminism a female superiority movement.

[DJB72]

I was raised that way. I've been accused of being sexist as a teenager for insisting I walk between a girl my age and the traffic on a school trip to Italy.

She changed her mind when a car hopped the curb and hit me instead of her.

It's just good manners to be the protector as far as I'm concerned. Chivalry and respect.

[Anonymous]

I adore most women, but certainly not all of them deserve admiration because they are nasty little shits on the inside. Even so, they get the same basic human respect I give anyone else. But the women who are smart, intelligent and respectful are the ones who turn me on endlessly and i will simp for them all day long. I get pleasure out of giving them pleasure, it's that simple. Maybe that's somehow selfish, but it works for everyone involved.

[AviatorTom]

Chivalry is learned, and not all men learn it. Consider yourself fortunate.

[motownplayer2000]

If she truly wanted to get to know me, she wasn’t from the western woke society. She knew how to treat me from the start.. and it wasn’t about her and always her… then she could get that treatment. Chivalry is dead and women killed it by how they have been acting.

[BarryLiverstone]

My family.. dad and grandfather. They are role models who taught me by example how to act like a gentleman.

[NathanDavis]

I don't pretend...

I just am the way I am, genuine... no acting

[JTinSC1981]

A woman's willingness to go full bore into sexual areas with me. Any woman that pleases me sexually gets treated like an absolute princess. Deny and frustrate me and I'm out.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

Toxic masculinity rearing its penis in a thread on Chivalry. How... quaint. Care for freeing up your other hand and join the rest of us on healthy discourse?

[LiamJHayden]

Just the way I am. I recognize that each person is a unique individual, so even if the person does not recognize his or her own dignity, I will.

[SotiCoto]

Nothing. That isn't me, so I'd never pretend to be like that. Besides, it is pathetic behaviour.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

Someone needs a hug!

[Goahead76]

It isn't hard to be courteous. i wouldn't read more into it than just being nice to another human being.

[stratford]

Modesty and when she shows me the same respect I show her.

[RRR23]

Women don't like gentleman. They think that's corny. They want a guy to treat them like crap. They are attracted to toxic behavioral. They love drama.

[Nikki1989]

Troll.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

@Nikki1989 Agree

[justabuddy]

I treat everyone with the same amount of respect. Weather that respect grows or shrinks is upmto. them.

[Anonymous]

Her behaving like a lady and embracing her femininity.

[Part2603]

Lol, obvious feminist bullshit is obvious.

[Wolf_Thunderspirit]

Awe. Someone hurt you, didn't they? You need a hug.

[OtterMan68]

they way I was raised

[Emmytexrex]

Lol because I am a gentleman

[handsomelad70]

Being out with her.

[Knightwatch27]

If you want a gentleman, act like a lady.

[Dantezam]

Physical attraction, moral values etc