Why is a coworker more friendly to me than usual? Months ago he was smiling and making long eye contact then stopped. Now he seems to be slowly?

[Fumnlethedogg]

getting back to that again. Why

[SueShe]

He was smiling and more friendly towards you because, like most males that interact with females, his ultimate goal is to get into your pants. That is what males do because they are slaves of their testosterone and not in command over them.

Basically, that is how it is but guys will obviously deny it.

Seeing that his clumsy attempt did not fruit, he gave you the hot-cold treatment, meaning that he ignored you to confuse you and given the fact that you ask this question here, leads me to believe that he was successful.

This is simply his 2nd. attempt at getting your attention and hopefully achieve what he could not with the first attempt.

Just don't give him that chance and don't change your behavior. He will eventually stop when he sees that he is not lucky and will probably try to find another victim.

[Fumnlethedogg]

Why do you assume it’s that and not genuine liking me?

[SueShe]

Oh he does like you and when the novelty of having gotten you where he wanted, then he will move to the next victim. Do you want to bet?

[Fumnlethedogg]

But why can’t he actually want to becc by with me for life?

[SueShe]

A person that is serious about another one would not be acting the way he does. Either he has something that he does not tell you or then you don't tell us everything.

[Fumnlethedogg]

I see. As far I can tell he’s just mild flirting if that, based on body language. I figured he’s shy maybe. Known him for years (not same department at work).

[SueShe]

Flirting is always dangerous. The definition of flirting is

"a sexual behavior involving spoken or written communication, as well as body language, by one person to another, to suggest interest in a deeper relationship with the other person".

Now, we all know what is meant under a "deeper relationship", right?

[DishLady]

1. He's fishing to see if you're interested.

2. He was into you... then got distracted with work/life... then returned to being interested in you.

3. He was interested in you... found some other point of interest that didn't work out... and is now looking at you again.

[Fumnlethedogg]

Hope it’s not 3

[DishLady]

🤷🏻‍♀️ 🤷🏻‍♀️ 🤷🏻‍♀️
Those are typically the three standard things.

[Messianic_Monk]

He probably likes you. The eye contact thing is a way of testing whether or not you're interested. If you state back and smile that's his green light.

[Fumnlethedogg]

I think I have done it once before when we were kinda a far distance but I was waking his way. I don't know if maybe he didn’t see it or what but he seemed to be looking when I did it and he was smiling and looking too so I don't know lol.

[Avicenna]

It could have nothing to do with you, or maybe he just finds you attractive and doesn't have any other woman he's interested in at the moment.

[Fumnlethedogg]

So it’s nothing deep? He’s just bored?

[Avicenna]

Probably, yeah. If a guy is really, really interested, he'd approach

[Fumnlethedogg]

Oh wonderful! I love being a time pass

[Avicenna]

LOL... it happens

[Fumnlethedogg]

I’m not sure why I’d be the time pass. I am pretty shy and quiet and don’t seek attention.

[Avicenna]

It's often the lure of the ones that aren't attention seekers that get a guy's attention

[Meisdipa]

Maybe he thinks he missed his shot and is trying to keep himself away

[Fumnlethedogg]

But he is doing it again out of nowhere after month or months of not doing it.