My husband is freaking out about everything help?

[Anonymous]

I can't do anything right. if I am 10 minutes late to get out of the office he accuses me of being a cheat. my house is 5 minutes from my work. i have to come home in my 20minutes lunch break and serve food and get him to eat and do the dishes. i wore my ring on my middle finger because it's tight in the ring finger. he was caressing my hand lovingly and suddenly freaked out and said I wanna show people that I'm unmarried that's why I wore it on that finger. sometimes follows me to work. he's lost him job cos he'd take leaves or leave abruptly to escort me to wherever I was going. I've been an idiot thinking he just cares about me. Is he behaving that way cz he's jobless and going through depression? would it be ok when he gets a job?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

You're actually describing mild paranoid behaviours, in the pure psychological sense of it, lost job is certainly a big hit for him, it is reasonable to assume that clinging on you makes him compensate for the job he lost. Clinging on you could make him feel more "in control" to override the powerlessness he feels.

So, yes, a job could make him regain the control he lost over his life, in his personal perception. Very important point to consider, is this behaviour new? If it is new then it could be caused by the job lost. If it is more rooted in time, that gets more complicated then.

I would try to open up the guy, tickle the vulnerability he's displaying, but, please, do it only if you feel confident and safe enough :)

[Asker]

No it's not new tho. Thinking back. There were behavior like these that I was too in love to notice. I don't know if I'm remembering things wrong

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Then, it really depends on how confident you feel to disarm your guy, emotionally speaking, because from what I see, he's vulnerable and maybe he doesn't even realize. One of the ways to disarm is love and acceptance. But, don't push it, don't go inside this if you don't feel okay with this approach

[hahahmm]

I see a bunch of people telling you to leave the guy. if our ancestors left each other every time they had a bump in the road we wouldn't even have any marriages at all. Funny how when a woman acts 100x worse due to stress guys are expected to be there for her & yet men and women take the same vow to stay loyal in sickness and in health.

Just tell him he's being emotional like a chick and you didn't marry a chick. See what happens. If you jump ship every time there's a bump in the road you will never be able to keep a relationship going. How many marriages do you want? 20?

[Daniela1982]

He is highly possessive of you, and in my opinion, quite obsessed with you because he feels he could never find another woman willing to put up with this shit. If it were me, I would kick him out, or you yourself leave. I don't think anything good will come of it if you stay with him.

[Asker]

I can't imagine having and raising kids with him anymore.

[Daniela1982]

So then you already know the answer to your question.

[Nikki1989]

He is possessive, controlling and probably should be in some kind of therapy. If he is not prepared to change his toxic ways, dump this creep and move on.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

After reading your story all I can say is I’m glad I’m not married & it sucks to be you. If truth be told you are not in a marriage you are in jail & surprise, surprise your husband is the warden. Serve him divorce papers & get out quickly, wtf are you waiting for?

[Summeroflove]

If you’re not doing anything wrong I would be very worried he’s doing something and is projecting that on you. That happens so often that someone could never cheat or hurt the other, but someone starts doing something and they get defensive.

[Asker]

I would never. I didn't need to marry him if I just wanted to hang out with other guys. He had three exes before me and that's absolutely normal but he hid his 4th ex because he didn't even breakup with her, just ignored her. Which I found out later. Technically he's the one who hid things from me

[Summeroflove]

Well yes asker and believe me what you know is the tip of the ice burg

[Summeroflove]

*iceberg

[Summeroflove]

But unfortunately his mind doesn’t think like yours. He could be a dark personality so he cared about getting married to have kids and on the outside live a picture perfect life.

[Finchie40]

You need to get away , he is extreme insecure which is not a good thing , cuz he doesn’t trust you whatsoever. Usually when someone is that insecure they are the ones you shouldn’t trust

[Staximus]

You don't need to come home to cook him lunch. Why are you tolerating this bullshit behavior? Tell that bum to get a job and stop being an insecure bitch boy.

[slatyb]

This is intolerable. Do you have children? No, it won't be ok when he gets a job. Get the hell out.

[Anonymous]

What makes me laugh is you women choose a men like this over a hundred others guy you could of had. Then you want advice from the same men you passed on for this guy.😆😆😆

[DrPepper12]

If you haven't left him by the time you read this you're a fool

[Anonymous]

No, I don't believe your story. If it's true you should leave him. If you are a real woman then try to help him change into a nice guy, help him get a job. Running away from a relationship is immaturity.

[Anonymous]

I'd say divorce him but he could flip out and kill you so get in first, eliminate him for the betterment of society and to ensure your safety

[noohair]

You married a control freak. Did you not know this before saying Yes?

[scott04sa22]

Get the fuck out