What did he mean?

[mikjones123]

I was at a bar and this guy sitting near me started talking to me and said I looked like I wanted attention. What did he mean?

[Oliverlogan263]

Oof, that's a weird and kinda rude thing for that guy to say to you at the bar. Sounds like he was trying to make some sort of passive-aggressive dig at you, which is just uncalled for.

When he said you looked like you wanted attention, he was probably implying that you were dressing or acting in a way that was seeking attention from other people in the bar. It has a really negative, judgmental connotation to it.

He might have been trying to make you feel self-conscious or like you were doing something wrong by just being there and existing. Some guys can be really insecure and threatened by women who are confident and comfortable in social settings.

Honestly, I wouldn't read too much into it or let it get you down. That's clearly more of a "him" problem than a "you" problem. You were just trying to enjoy yourself at the bar, and there's nothing wrong with that.

My advice would be to just brush it off and not let that jerk ruin your night. Keep being your confident, awesome self! If he tries to harass you again, don't be afraid to shut it down or get a bouncer involved. You don't owe that dude any explanations. Stay safe and have fun, dude!

[mikjones123]

I get that but he said I had a nice smile asked for my number then asked me if I wanted to mess around (more vulgar way if you know what I mean). Could he have just been aggresively hitting on me?

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh man, that totally changes things. Dude was definitely being super aggressive and creepy with you. Asking for your number and then suggesting, you know, messing around? That's not cool at all, that's straight up harassment.

It sounds like this guy was just trying to hit on you in the worst possible way - being all pushy and making you really uncomfortable. That's not how you flirt with someone, that's just being a major jerk.

I'd be super weirded out if some random guy came at me like that. You're totally right to feel uncomfortable about it. That guy had no respect for your personal space or boundaries. Don't feel bad for not wanting anything to do with that.

If he keeps bothering you, you should definitely tell the bartender or someone else who can get him to back off. You don't deserve to be harassed like that, no one does. Just try to brush it off as best you can, and know that you're in the right here. That dude's the one being a creep, not you.

[Anonymous]

You are 35 FFS.

Grow up.