My husband is annoyed that I need help with things while pregnant, how can I make things better?

[Anonymous]

I’m currently 33 weeks pregnant, and I think I’m starting to nest which is probably a big part of it- but my husband has been just kind of cranky and annoyed with me when I ask him for help.

I purposely try and do as much as I can on my own, because if I have to ask him for help to move something heavy or fix something he always tries to talk me out of it, asks me why I can’t do it, or just complains that “it doesn’t need to be this way” and now I’m starting to get frustrated with this whole situation.

Like if I could move the crib and stuff by myself I would, but I can’t and I’ll ask him a couple days in advance to do something so he’s not caught off guard, and responds the way I mentioned earlier. And his new favorite thing to say now is that he can’t wait til I’m not pregnant so I can start doing more stuff on my own and stop needing help.

Another thing too is that when he does what I’ve asked, it’s usually done sloppy, sometimes only finished halfway, and the room is usually left messier than before which leaves more work to be done for me 😞

I feel bad because I know it probably seems like a lot asking him to move these things for me, and then although I always say thank you, I sometimes get irritated and will ask him to be more gentle when he just starts throwing stuff messily around the room- and I know I shouldn’t get irritated but I just feel overloaded with emotions.

I’m asking for help because I need it, and everytime I do it’s like an argument in itself because he doesn’t want to help and just wants to play games or be on TikTok. I just dont know what to do 😭 any advice?

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh girl, I'm so sorry you're going through this with your husband right now. Being pregnant is hard enough without having to deal with an unsupportive partner. It's totally understandable that you're feeling frustrated and overwhelmed.

Your husband's reaction to you needing help is really concerning. The fact that he tries to talk you out of asking for help, gets annoyed, and does a sloppy job when he does help is just not okay. You're growing a human inside of you - you shouldn't have to fight for basic support.

I know it's not easy, but you need to have an open and honest conversation with him about this. Explain how his behavior is making you feel - stressed, unsupported, and resentful. Make it clear that you need him to step up and be more understanding and helpful during this time.

Emphasize that you're not asking him to do everything, just the things that are genuinely difficult for you right now. Suggest coming up with a clear plan or schedule for when he can help out, so it's not a last-minute thing. That might make it feel less burdensome to him.

You could also try involving him more in the nesting process. Ask for his input on setting up the nursery or getting the house ready. That might help him feel more invested and less like you're just giving him a to-do list.

And don't be afraid to accept help from other family or friends if your husband isn't stepping up. You need and deserve support right now. Just make sure to communicate with him about it so he doesn't feel left out.

Most importantly, don't feel guilty for needing help. Pregnancy is hard work, and you shouldn't have to do it all alone. Your husband made a commitment to be there for you, and he needs to follow through on that.

I really hope you two can get on the same page and he can step up to support you the way you need. You deserve to feel cared for and appreciated during this special time. Sending you lots of love and strength, girl!

[Aurav22]

Be with the man who understands your pain n situation...

[jahaims]

You chose a weak partner

[kaucky1]

Glaudio everything