Why do women get anxious and start avoiding me me as soon as I make an advance?

[navi0020]

I am asking this because this is recurrent in my life, it just keeps happening and I don't know why.

Before anything, I'd just like to say I've had women showing signs of interest in me before or even outright approach me, so it can't be that I'm just hideous or scary looking person.

I usually get interested in the kind of the hard working, intelligent, seemingly not too many past relationships woman.

It's all good and dandy with friendly conversation for weeks or months, until the moment I make the slightest advance.

I'm talking here about really simple stuff, like complimenting her hair "your hair looks bright and well take care of", or compliment her work ethic "that's why your boss has you in such high regard".

Usually, at the moment they apparently correspond with heart emojis or replies like "that's so sweet of you" or blushing if in person and even complimenting me back , but THEN... right after that, they just start distancing themselves, cutting off communication, leaving on read...

If we meet again in person, they look visibly PANICKED and anxious and in a rush to leave and avoid further personal interaction, if in a group they stand on the other side and not close by... Clearly avoiding me.

I mean, if the problem is that they are not interested or have someone else in the picture, can't they just say so? Why get into this panic and flight mode and make things a 1000x weirder than they need to be?

I don't double text or chase back, because they just seem to dread any interaction with me, I just leave it be, give them all the distance and space they needed, but they be gone forever... No contact does not work for me lol.

That's really weird... why do they react like this? Not only do they avoid me, they become anxious. What am I doing wrong? I don't harass them, I don't say or do anything inappropriate.

[_Maya_]

It has go be something you are saying or how you are saying it. It probably is how it comes off to them. You say everything is good up until you make an advance. Well that is the problem then. That's where things go wrong so it is obviously the way you make an advance that is the problem. You gave the example "your hair looks bright and well take care of". That we could come off wrong. Just reading that makes me cringe a little. It's so matter of fact in my opinion. It is way different than "your hair looks so nice" which comes off way more simple and genuine. No matter... the issue is obvious. It is the way you make the advance, what you say or how you say it. Given that's where things fall apart is a good indication of what you're doing wrong.

[Abbycado]

"as soon as I make an advance" problem identified.

[MagnusSandstorm]

Man in this case, from my personal experience, it's best not to approach women you already know, try to meet new women in such a setting where both the sides are aware right from the start that in case they approve of each other after the first few meetings, a relationship is what they will try to get into... sounds like since you already know these people beforehand, perhaps they see you as a friend very quickly. It is awkward to lose friends in the manner in which you described, very common though...

[BiHubbyFlor]

Agree cause women behave differently when your online as a date instead of hey let's be friends and I like you...
Also sounds like it might be something your doing or how you dress?

[In_Trance]

Must be something you're saying or doing

[navi0020]

Well, I really can't figure out what it is, otherwise I wouldn't be asking here other people about it..