Guys, What would you do for a girl you liked?

[DishLady]

Guys, what lengths would you go to for a girl you liked? Would you rather cycle through several acts of kindness rather than to just openly declare your feelings? How would you show/tell her that you like her?

[OlderAndWiser]

I never read "The Idiot's Guide To Girls" and I don't follow the usual playbook. I am very straightforward in expressing my thoughts and feelings. If we had a great first date, I tell her that I had a great time and I hope I can call her again soon to ask for a second date. I engage in all the chivalrous behaviors a lady should expect from a gentleman. I hold her hand. I maintain eye contact. I ask her what she wants to do on a date and I offer several suggestions. Initially, I might call her once midweek but soon I would be calling twice during the week. I pay attention to what she likes and what she dislikes. I send her flowers. After three or four months, I would suggest her meeting my family. When she tells me her birthday, I put it on my calendar so I don't forget it. When she starts spending nights at my home, I offer her some space in my drawers and closet, and I buy a silky robe for her to use when she is at my home. When we travel together, I buy a coffee mug that shows the place we visited, and that becomes her cup to use when she is with me. The idea is to make her feel that she is at home with me, that she is an essential part of my life, and that she is appreciated and valued. When I finally say "I love you," she knows that I really mean it sincerely.

[DishLady]

O&W, I love you. That's precisely what I was raised to expect from a gentleman. But nowadays even a guy who does 90-100% of that might still be messing with the gal. Everything is trivialized to make it seem like it's "just no big deal"... that the gal is expendable in their lives. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[OlderAndWiser]

People are taught that it is a weakness to ever display any vulnerability, but the willingness to expose our vulnerability is what leads to someone else trusting us.

[DishLady]

I know. I teach and preach that all day long. Some listen, some don’t. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[HawkPerception]

@OlderAndWiser Beautifully said as usual. Sadly times have changed (which entails a lot, but I won't go into that).

You're a classy man.

[OlderAndWiser]

@HawkPerception I appreciate your kind words!

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

I would say it depends on the person, what I think they expect out of me, and what I expect out of them.

Usually I am pretty measured, but I did use to go overboard a couple of times when I was younger.

As of now I am usually direct, in a polite way, but I am also flexible enough to match the energy I sense from her.

[DishLady]

Nice. ☺️

[DishLady]

Do you wait for her to take the lead or do you try to get her attention first and see her energy/response?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

It really depends on the person honestly.
With more assertive women, I generally take their lead. But recently, while frequenting a meeker girl, I started setting the pace myself - of course without making her uncomfortable or feeling forced.
There's a thin line between being assertive, and being overbearing.

For me it's also about picking up the small cues. We live near a big lake, and a couple of times on our dates on the lakeside she mentioned how she'd never been on the other side of the lake and was curious about it.

So the next time I took her for a day-long trip, showed her all the most picturesque spots.

[ryanrhino]

Depending on how much I liked her, it would vary from a small gift at lunch if in school or a large Valentine's day surprise. Neither worked for me in my youth.

As I aged, I just made my attraction known up front, especially when online dating.

[DryGermanGuy]

https://youtu.be/tbNlMtqrYS0?si=1mh6-fVd09KC1zh6

[DishLady]

Lol.

[exitseven]

I would do some grand gestures to demonstrate my feelings for her. If that did not work, the nuclear option would be to tell her how I felt.

[DishLady]

What would qualify as a grand gesture?

[Tarifa]

+1

But she usually knows by the time I consider the nuclear option. I'm very transparent.

[exitseven]

I would visit her in the hospital and take care of her afterwards.

[Anonymous]

I apparently will do more than I should. I would openly declare my feelings. My words and actions would get my feelings know.

[Friendlybro79]

Acts of kindness first, followed by actually telling her and asking her out on a date.

[spartan55]

I'd call her AT LEAST once a week.

[Anonymous]

Whatever she wants me to do.

[DishLady]

Really? What if what she's asking is unreasonable?

[Opinion Owner]

Well, if I love her, I would probably obey her.

[DishLady]

Wow... ok then...

[Opinion Owner]

Of course, I would try to reason with her first, but I do like dominant girls ;)

[DishLady]

The couple next door to me is like that. The guy is very tough and productive but when his girl is around he gets all gooey from the inside out and just does whatever she likes. It's amazing and surprising all at once.

[Opinion Owner]

I know the feeling :P

[Panthero80]

This is something I am still working on.

[Anonymous]

I will do my best for my love.