Should I tell him he no longer has the right to speak to me on his terms and it’s better not to speak?

[Anonymous]

Am I a loser or something because my coworker doesn’t want to connect with me even after we found out we have a lot in common? But he seems open with other coworkers and female coworkers.. am I just not good enough where even though we are next door he treats me hot and cold? Tomorrow I was going to tell him “ please don’t feel obligated to speak to me “ or should I say something colder

[Anonymous]

Don't do that. If you are interested in him, make a direct move. If your sure he doesn't like you, move on.

[Asker]

Why not? He doesn’t care about how I feel when he’s hot and cold

[Opinion Owner]

You'll look poorly to your other coworkers. It's not worth risking your own reputation for someone who doesn't seem to care for you.

[Asker]

What did I do wrong?

[beenherebefore]

Don't say absolutely anything. Keep it nice at short. At work you should keep things strictly professional and not take things personally.

[WhitneySnow]

Don’t bother with all the drama. Just be casual and civil and polite but not too friendly.

[WhitneySnow]

Sorry girl. This guy is just not into you. Don’t be like a jerky guy and be mean to him because he’s not interested.

[Asker]

Well he’s not all that great to me and I didn’t do anything

[WhitneySnow]

Just be civil

[Asker]

No why should I. I’ll let him know that he’s not obligated to talk to me

[WhitneySnow]

Do what you want. But your colleagues will think you’re a bitch.

[Asker]

But he’s not a jerk

[WhitneySnow]

I’m glad he’s not a jerk. I don’t think he feels obligated to talk to you. He’s just being nice.

[Asker]

He doesn’t have to be nice nor does he have to speak to me

[WhitneySnow]

No but he does. Just be polite and civil toward him. You guys have to work together, plus like you said he’s not a bad guy. He’s just not into you like that.

[Asker]

He’s warmer with my other coworker female… she looks like shrek

[WhitneySnow]

Maybe he’s into her. Even Shreks need love.

I do find it odd that’s he’s cold to you. Most people are at least decently polite to their coworkers.

Gtg for now. Have a great night.

[Asker]

He’s hot and cold to me

[WhitneySnow]

Again, that is really odd. Most people don’t treat their coworkers that way. Best to ignore it and be polite but not too friendly.

Night!

[Pohjolan]

I feel like there is missing context.

Anyway don't act like a Karen.

Do your work, get paid, go home.

[Anonymous]

They are shy