How do I know if a much older man is into me?

[Anonymous]

Im a 25F and I'm into older men. I've had a hard time telling the difference between attraction and just being friendly. The men I frequent around at my job are around 50 and pussyfoot around with mixed signals. I dont want to misread it. What are some subtle signs they are attracted to me or how can I open that door a little without scaring them off?

[abc3643]

The subtle sign that they are attracted to you is that you are 25. That's it.
HOWEVER, older men keep their shit together. They may recognize that the age difference is likely to be a problem in some way. For instance, you wanting kids and he not wanting any since his kids are already grown and he needs to focus on retirement. Or, he may have ED and not want to disappoint you in bed and then leave him for a younger man.

In short, young women are generally attractive to us, but we understand the realities and complexities of such relationships and that gives many men pause before proceeding with such a relationship.

[abc3643]

If you DO want to pursue this path, you need to somehow get the word out that you are available. And, more, consider "seeking advice" from an older man. That is really a ploy for him to get to know you better and he might be interested and act on it. The "Damsel In Distress" motif is an excellent way for a woman to date a man without yet dating him. Believe it or not, I didn't realize it at the time, but I used that ploy myself back in 1990 and it worked. I can elaborate on this if you wish.

[Asker]

Please do.

[abc3643]

Well, I did have a real need, but this was also a useful way to get acquainted with a beautiful girl who would become my girlfriend...

In the summer of 1990, I needed to learn the C programming language. This girl was a friend of my friend; I had met her casually at our sausage party college when she was talking to him. He introduced me. She was beautiful and so I assumed she was already taken, etc., given all the horny dicks on campus.

One day, 10 AUG 1990, I was sitting in our student union. No one else was around. She came in a saw me, recognized me, and decided to sit with me. I was transformed by her and became smitten for the first time in 19 years since 1971. After about an hour, she had to leave...

So, over the next week, I realized I needed to spend more time with her. Again, I needed to learn C and I realized that she could help me. Thus, I came up with an idea: I'd ask her to help me learn C and, in return, I'd take her out to dinner anywhere she wanted.

Now, getting to that point where I make that proposition is a fun story itself. Suffice it to say, she didn't teach me C, but we did become a couple.

She dumped me on her mother's 50th birthday 17 months later in January 1992. I've been heartbroken ever since. I moved on, but, in a way, I wish I never did because I've been miserable since.

[egan3141]

Welcome to the delicate balance of human interaction. There is no way to truly know without communication. No matter what sign is chosen, it isn't universal. Both kind people and romantically interested people will use it. And this goes both ways (men doing it, and women doing it).

[itsannalee]

If he likes you, you’ll feel that.
Men are simple, if they like and have interests they’ll show it.

[DryGermanGuy]

Watch the movie The House Bunny. Lots of practical tips there! :-D

[bowenw]

The most obvious thing is hanging around you to talk including flirting.

[Anonymous]

How to know whether an older man is into you: He is an older man and you are a young girl.

[In_Trance]

ask him

[zombiewoof]

Just ask