Guys, Why he acts shy/nervous/avoidant?

[Anonymous]

A guy I've gotten to know over the last few months is showing signs he likes me/attracted to me such as always running his hand through his hair while looking at me, staring at me from across the room, etc. When his female friends talk and make jokes about their bodies or body parts (like boobs) he laughs, but when I do it, he gets quiet and starts avoid me. Why is this? Are some guys really that shy? Or is he just uncomfortable? I'm not sure if he is just shy or uncomfortable.

[Anonymous]

I acted similarly around my one crush. I was both very shy and uncomfortable when I was within an earshot of her. I wanted to do something, but I would get too anxious.

[Asker]

Good to know, makes it hard to tell if it's rejection or just nerves haha.

[Asker]

We talked about a hockey team we both like, next day he wore a hat with the team name on it. He also tends to wear matching outfits with me for example we both wore quicksilver hoodies, then when he noticed I was wearing black hoodie, he wore a black jacket next day and he always has these little quiet chuckles when I talk, he also observes me when I am talking to others, and always quick to help me, but then when I went to apologize to him about some things he said "you're good" but then walks away as if he is uncomfortable and then I feel bad (feels like he is upset/annoyed or something) but then he said good morning to me next day. My ex boyfriend would literally walk away fast when I went to kiss him for first time when we first started dating and later he said he was just shy. That even possible for guys to be THAT shy?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah. I'm probably worse than both.

[Asker]

I did not think it was possible for guys ti be that shy/nervous, I don't understand why they are like with me... I'm not a smoking hot or anything, sure im cute but no bomb shell lol. Also, he just acts weird sometimes... for example I had an older gentleman tell me thatbI have a beautiful name and when I told guy about it, he didn't say a word/just looked at me. And then when I've been flirted with he asked me about it and asked what was said, etc. Almost like he's jelous or protective and he also goes out of his way to help me with stuff sometimes. I truly don't understand how a guy could be that awkward/shy around someone like me lol

[Opinion Owner]

Sometimes, a girl can click all the boxes. Next thing tou know, you are obsessed. I'm so shy around women, I'm basically handicapped. I'm very introverted normally, but I have no problems speaking up for myself or communicating with strangers.

[Asker]

I am starting to think he is that shy because when we were sitting in the same room he sat in the chair across from me, but was leaning on the arm rest towards me when he could have easily turned away from me and faced the computer. Also when I asked him why it seems like he is ignoring me and asked if I upset him he said "I'm not trying to" and said "no you're good" then when I asked him "is it that ypu just don't like me?" He said "no its not that" but then we stopped talking because his friend came up and we went our separate ways. So what exactly does this mean? He still looks at me every once in a while, seems like he has an easy time talking to everyone else but me. How is it possible for a guy to be that nervous/scared to talk to me? Especially with it being 5 months of getting to know each other but I mean I get nervous too

[Opinion Owner]

You might be giving him new feelings he isn't used to. I completely fell for a girl, and it took me a while understand that. She made me act and think completely differently than anyone else.

[spartan55]

You need to have more than 'running his hand through his hair' to know if he is interested... come on now.

[bowenw]

Some guys are shy. Try talking to him to break the ice.

[Asker]

I have talked to him a few times, he has talked to me as well, and let me stand with him& his family at hockey game but soon as I cracked a joke talking about my breats (I said boobs/tits) he got all nervous and even though he said all good he acted flustered and kinda started to avoid me a little bit, but still talked to me after so I'm wondering if he got flustered because he is attracted to me? Why would he act this way with me but not his female friends? Its like he just gets so nervous he can't even look at me, tries to change the subject. He acts different with me than he does everyone else, not in a bad way, he's always quick to help me, never wants me to help him or never wants me to buy him things but let's his female friend buy him stuff (but they have known each other for 10 years and age is married).

[bowenw]

At hockey games he may be embarrassed by your jokes about breasts with his family there. Does he act that way when you are alone with him? If he has feelings for you, he may be wanting to impress you by acting like a gentleman, but doesn't do this with other females he doesn't have feeling for.

[Asker]

No I would never joke like that around his family, it's only when I am alone with him that he gets all nervous/flustered if I make a joke about my boobs in a non creepy way, just subtle way, he then changes the subject and when I asked him if I upset him/why he avoiding me he said "no you're good, I am just busy"

[bowenw]

It seems like he is embarrassed for some reason. He may say you're good, when if fact he is uncomfortable.

[spartan55]

@asker he doesn't know you well enough to be joking about your boobs (why you thought that was a good idea I don't know)
Stop hyperfocusing on how he treats you different and get to know each other. K

[Asker]

I admitted I had a crush on him through text, he then bumped my hand "accidently"... I know some guys get very shy with certain things. For example, my ex boyfriend when we first started seeing each other when I went to kiss him on the cheek for the first time, he walked away fast but had a smirk on his face the whole time, when I asked him about it he said he was just nervous, to be fair he only had 1 other relationship before me. It gets confusing as it almost seems like rejection, but some guys are very shy when it comes to that stuff.

[Asker]

@spartan55 you make a good point and you are right, it was kind of a dumb mistake

[bowenw]

I suggest you just continue to be yourself around him and see what happens.

[spartan55]

Indeed they are. Is your age correct? Mid twenties is about the time the shy excuse doesn't really fly anymore.

[Asker]

@spartan55 yes we are both mid twenties, he will be 26 in a couple months

[spartan55]

Hmmm, yeah that's a bit odd, has he dated much?

[Asker]

We talked about a hockey team we both like, next day he wore a hat with the team name on it. He also tends to wear matching outfits with me for example we both wore quicksilver hoodies, then when he noticed I was wearing black hoodie, he wore a black jacket next day and he always has these little quiet chuckles when I talk, he also observes me when I am talking to others, and always quick to help me, but then when I went to apologize to him about some things he said "you're good" but then walks away as if he is uncomfortable and then I feel bad but then he said good morning to me next day. My ex boyfriend would literally walk away fast when I went to kiss him for first time when we first started dating and later he said he was just shy. That even possible for guys to be THAT shy?

[bowenw]

It is possible. Alternatively he may have a mental disorder.

[spartan55]

Is there even one second in the day you aren't watching the guy? 🙄

[Asker]

@spartan55 no, has only had 1 serious relationship and 1 high school girlfriend

[Asker]

@spartan55 no, has only had 1 serious relationship and 1 high school girlfriend

[loveladies1]

Definitely shy and yes. For me I only get shy if I really like someone. It's easy to talk to a girl you only see as a friend, or one you don't really have feelings for (other than lust).

[Redbeardviking]

Definitely shy but I but if you start to date that will go away.