Why do women have a tendency to call socially awkward guys "creepy" and "weird"?

Question

This frustrates me beyond belief. I notice many women have a tendency to group guys who are socially awkward into the group of "creepy", "weird", and odd people who girls think just want to get into their pants.

Yet the guys who actually have issues and really do want to get into their pants, and play games and manipulate, they like and think are sweet. It frustrates me how often this happens. Women might date a guy because he's "smooth" and she thinks he's a sweetheart, while he's a jerk.

I'm sort of a nice guy, but not the stereotype. I'm not a pushover, but make an effort to be nice and kind to everyone. I don't play games and always try to be honest. I'm just a tad socially awkward and don't quite know when to approach, when to leave, and sometimes say the wrong things. I've gotten better though. Many girls group me into the "creepy" group. It really irritates me.

kheserthorpe · Accepted Answer

Being socially awkward is creepy.

Creepy is not the same as 'just wants to get into pants'.

Creepy means 'unsettling'.

You seem unsettling if you don't seem authentic, if the way you are acting seems faked in some way. In reality, it may simply be that you are very nervous. Humans are very sensitive to someone seeming tense or inauthentic. We are NOT able to easily tell WHY. We simply know 'something isn't right'. These instincts no doubt helped keep us alive for most of our history, when meeting strangers. If the stranger is acting strangely - maybe they want to rob you, maybe they're afraid you're going to rob them and are going to take you out first, maybe ... who knows? But we can't feel comfortable and at ease around people who are not themselves relaxed.

Instead of complaining that its unfair, keep tackling the anxiety, practice relaxation, and try to be as open and real as possible. Some girls will no doubt think you're a pervert (so what?) but some girls will NOT find you creepy. Because creepy is normally about being strangely secretive.

Schyler · Accepted Answer

The thing is that MOST of socially awkward guys really really ARE weird and creepy!

It doesn't mean that ALL are, but as I said - most of them, just take a look around!

If you're way too nervous when talking to a girl, if you have terrible sense of clothing style, if you too early start to speak about sex, perversions, politics or religion then excuse it is creepy!

No girl really wants you to be super smooth PUA, they even like if you're a LITTLE nervous - note the difference between " a little" and "way too much"

Maybe you don't really see this or maybe the girls around your area are stupid, but when they are approached by super-smooth super-nice guy, they just KNOW what's his game! But as I said.. as long as they ain't stupid!

And the last thing - if you REALLY are a nice, good guy who is not creepy or not weird as you said you shouldn't care too much about the stereotypes!

The truth is still truth even if millions of people believe in lies!

pr3ttybr0wn · Accepted Answer

because socially awkward people read as creepy and weird to others. if it makes you feel any better, they call socially awkward girls that too and outcast them as well. socially awkward people just make others uncomfortable

good for you for getting better though, the best way to break out of awkardness is to be more accostomed to social situations.

and I'm a little sick of the weird guy who thinks he's a nice guy vs. player argument. if socially awkward guys were attractive to women, and one day woke up with gorgeous girls on their jock like that, then most of you would be doing exactly what the jerk/players are doing. so stop judging and moralizing, its not gonna make girls switch to guys they find strange and unsettling

Mysterious1 · Accepted Answer

I consider a guy creepy based on how they act towards me. Socially awkward is not the issue, unless it directly affects what is being said to me. I've had guys comment on how they bet I was in bed, say weird random things about my size, even get over controlling and paranoid about the friends I was hanging out with and say I was probably sleeping with any of them that had the right parts, AND WE WERENT EVEN DATING! As long as a socially awkward guy thinks before he speaks I believe he can be successful.

ShootingStar5 · Accepted Answer

creepy: adj. 1. Of or producing a sensation of uneasiness or fear Basically socially awkward guys have a tendency of making girls uncomfortable/uneasy, which makes them creepy.

Olivia9 · Accepted Answer

Well personal space barriers being broken I think is the key to someone being a creep, so to speak.

Anonymous · Answer

Socially awkward people *are* creepy and weird.

The average person goes about his or her business every day, looking at things which catch their conscious interest. But the sub-conscious is looking at everything, constantly on alert for things that might be prove dangerous or interesting.

When we run into someone who is, as you say, socially awkward, it doesn't take long for our subconscious to realize that the person is not acting "normally". Lots of little social cues are missing or mis-timed. Or out of sequence.

We are usually not even consciously aware of this. But our subconscious is screaming at us. "This guy is weird! Possibly DANGEROUS! Get away from him now!"

It triggers something in us, like warning us of a predator who is mimicking humans (badly) just to get into the group and kill us in our sleep.

20Questions · Answer

Yeah...you just have to work on it man. My little brother is the way you described. When girls show interest in him he struggles. Good thing he's only 20. At the end of the day you know that girls generally prefer guys who can at least act like extroverts. If you haven't learnt the social skills yet, what are you waiting for? This is an imperfect, broken world, we're all flawed, but don't stay where you're at, better yourself, think more confidently and soon you'll become (more of) it.

Aurelius420 · Answer

Dude just be a confident boss. Go buy the book or download it for free off a torrent. "Double your dating by Chris Calo" Trust me, I flirt with every girl I can at work even the super fine girls now find me attractive. Girls want someone confident in themselves, unpredictable, fun, outgoing. Honestly think about the girls that don't attract you..the ones that are super shy..not very outgoing..not good at holding conversation..just always seem depressed. Women want to be with someone that is going to make them FEEL happy. Everything a woman does is based on how you make her FEEL. /thread

AllDay · Answer

Dude I'm the same way

and I am weird!

I'm a good weird not the creepy weird lol

Would you rather be different? or like everyone else?

The best thing I can say is think before you speak and think if it actually makes sense and make sure to surround yourself with good people and as long as you're doing the right thing keep doin' what you're doin!

And if you think you aren't doing the right thing anymore then change it.

Anonymous · Answer

Remember the 3 second rule, it goes a long way to make yourself seem more spontaneous and less calculated.  And always add a time constraint so she knows you'll soon be leaving.

Anonymous · Answer

I do not. I don't group guys into the creepy group unless he says something really off to me.

Eiffelgirl21 · Answer

they are ignorant. that is all.

socalgamehater2006 · Answer

girls have higher standards

ihatetakingcharge · Answer

because girls are paranoid like that

Anonymous · Answer

because they are creepy.

Anonymous · Answer

The truth hurts.

Why do women have a tendency to call socially awkward guys "creepy" and "weird"?

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Why do women have a tendency to call socially awkward guys "creepy" and "weird"?

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