How true is this statement: "Men want to be heroes to women"

[Anonymous]

I have a close friend who went to a workshop about dealing with me in relationships both romantic and day to day. One of the most important things she learned was that men want to be viewed as heroes to women. They want to make women happy and feel appreciated in return.

How true do you think this is? And what about men in the work environment...how does that work?

[sa230e]

Sort of but I don't know if I can really agree with the word "hero". Certainly I want to be respected and loved but the concept of "hero" commends itself, in my mind, almost to worship and I think that goes a little too far. I want to feel valuable to women but I don't want them to kiss my ass.

I think treating someone with such deference serves more to feed their ego than warm their heart. Maybe, I'm just a weirdo but it feels kind of sexist to me. If I'm the hero that makes her the helpless "damsel in distress" and I don't think that's a very good dynamic for a relationship. I don't need to feel power over a woman to affirm my masculinity. If she's with me, that's all I need. I want a girl to love me, as I am, flaws and all, not an image.

There are some guys who like that, though. Maybe the presenter was right and I'm just... different.

[steve1122]

I want to be my woman's hero.. and I would feel very uncomfortable if I found out some other guy was. Some people see this as a negative thing- that it represents some kind of control or power thing over the woman. To me, being her hero means being willing to help her, to bear her up when she is down, and to sacrifice whatever I have to in order to do those things. There is nothing about owning or controlling her.

I am not super strong or bullet proof. I can't fly or leap tall buildings. But I can do everything in my power to make her see me as the best example of a good and decent man in her life, and to make her understand that she can trust me with anything and I will never hurt her.

[toulouse]

who doesn't want to make the person they love happy.. and be appreciated in return? to say that men want that, I think just means they want sex.

btw, what did the workshop say women want? 9 out of 10 its not what I want.. I'm a woman. I don't think a work shop can tell you what men want. men are not one person. there are billions f men in the world.. one workshop can only tell you what the person giving the workshop thinks f men. or interprets men as wanting.