Are violent men attractive?

Question

Not men who hit girls, but short-tempered men who would knock out other men at the drop of a hat.Is this attractive, or would you prefer a calmer assertive man?

6Paul11 · Accepted Answer

I will tell you from personal experience, that women are more scared of violence than attracted by it.

I used to be more of a hot head, and got into it with a guy in front of a girl that I was dating. He got in my face and I whupped the snot out of him. The girl was more terrified of me than turned on. She didn't even want to touch me, I guess she was scared of what I could do. Needless to say, it was a quiet ride home. I apologized to her later, and I've never let it happen again. She understood. We broke it off a bit later, but not because of this incident.

At the end of the day, I think a woman is more turned on by knowing that the guy could throw down if needed. They just don't want to be around when it happens.

OpenClose · Accepted Answer

There was/is a big deal going on about this in the south London estates:

link

Many guys probably feel pressured into this sort of behavior because of how confidence is portrayed, and because of how homophobic male culture seems to be. That is, we have to be as non-gay or non-feminine as possible.

Calm and assertive will always win out. It says "I'm not a fighter. But if it became absolutely necessary, I would to whatever it takes to stand my ground.", it merits respect and shows emotional control. Honor and stability are the parts women are attracted to.

Violence doesn't show this unless the scenario is dangerous enough, like the ghetto. Anywhere else, it screams mental problems.

lala-193 · Accepted Answer

angry men aren't attractive, but strong men are. I think I'd like a guy who was a good fighter, but didn't start fights. I used to think my answer was no to this question, but then I realized I was lying to myself, I mean I absolutely love the show that sons of anarchy and am very attracted to several of the characters who are all portrayed as being tremendously violent. I wouldn't want a guy who was angry all the time though, angry people just ruin my good mood and general aren't fun. and loosing your temper only shows a lack of self restraint.

CrystalMinds · Accepted Answer

I don't like them and it's a major turn off for me. A friend of mine was in a relationship with such a guy and it ended badly...real bad. I'm a bit short tempered myself and I don't need a guy who would freak out and get all worked up with me but who could calm me down. I once almost dated a guy who was short tempered and to be honest, I was afraid he would start hitting me. He got pissed off once and started throwing bottles, tables (yes, tables), ... so no.

txcos20 · Accepted Answer

when protecting me yes that's attractive, but as someone else stated previously I would be too afraid he would hit me. however I have a short temper myself and I don't mind arguing with him every so often, but I would need someone who would help calm me down. if a guy hot me tho, I'm not OK with that at all and I would hit him back. :-)

RosaliaVanderbilt · Answer

I won't lie on a very primal level violent men are attractive.  It's a biological regression to times when the violent man was necessary for survival.  But in this day and age, violence is rarely necessary.  I have watched a guy friend completely destroy another guy (outside of a bar, after some heated words), and while I was unwittingly impressed (violence is strongly linked to testosterone and masculinity), I was also kind of scared.  I never really looked at him the same way again -- it was kind of like, don't annoy this one too much!

Hal2002 · Answer

Unfortunately to many women are attracted to this type of guy, you ever notice this type of guys always has the hot girlfriend. Women will say that they are not attracted to them when sitting alone or in a group, but when in the presents of one of these guys it is a different story.

I know women that are educated, have high power jobs and in control of their lives. Than go out meet this kind of guys, and start acting like brainless bimbos.

We may think we are civilised, but nature has programmed women over thousands of years to be attracted to the alpha male and unfortunately the violent aggressive ass hole is an alpha male.

mlrock · Answer

I can't speak for all women, but I can speak from my personal observations.  I had a roommate who was incredibly short-tempered and not above inflicting physical harm on other people when they angered him, and he had an incredible sex life and was later in a relationship with an incredibly attractive girl.  On the other hand, I'm a pretty pacifistic, non-confrontational guy, and my love/sex life is virtually non-existent.  I have yet to get past a third date, and I can't seem to go on dates with women that I find physically attractive.  So from my experience, yes!

DumbandStuff · Answer

If you are that person you seriously need to check yourself before you get wrecked. If you are going around doing that basically looking to get into physical altercations realize what you're doing. Along with anytime someone gets knocked out they are physically never the same and it literally does take a little out of them. I'm sure the girl will find it really attractive as well when you try do it again and that guy knocks you on your silly little ass, and then you have to hope they stop once you are unconscious, or you might never wake up again.

Usemyname · Answer

Calmer assertive men for sure. I dated a guy who swore he would never dream of hitting me, but when he got upset he had no problem taking it out on a wall or a door. It just always scared me that he would hurt somebody. Also being a child of abuse, I have some pretty deep-seeded issues about violence towards anybody.

confused4now · Answer

I really don't have a temper.  Hell, when I vent I often make people laugh, which I don't really mind.  That's what makes me so intimidating.  When I flip the switch and get serious, there is such a change in my demeanor that the person I'm mad at is scared $#*+le$$

CrazyCherryBlossom · Answer

Well, considering I'm a die heart Rapheal fan (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I don't, I'm so lame XD), I would say it is a bit attractive. But remember, Rapheal was working on his anger and trying to stop himself from lashing out so often. So yes, it can be a wee bit attractive, but if you can, work on it. Tell the girl who your seeing, if you are, that'll your working on it. And actually DO IT.

Anonymous · Answer

Look I have spoken to women about this subject before and many do feel attracted to a "bad boy" or "gangster" type of guy. Obviously this does not account for all women, but believe me although women do want to be treated with respect by a Prince Charming, the attraction to a Mr Nasty is electric for a lot of women.

Chassana · Answer

Mm...well. I'd allude this to a stereotypical tantrum. If guys throw violent tantrums, girls throw emotional tantrums.

The occasional emotional fit is acceptable, but how would you like it if a girl started drama at the drop of a hat?

If I were you, I'd be very afraid :P

Freetobe007 · Answer

Not necessarily violent men, but it is attractive when a guy can physically defend himself. It's not attractive when you feel like you have to protect the guy because he can't fight or you feel like you have to worry about him.

I'd prefer a combination of the two.

journeyman1126 · Answer

Yes, sometimes.

But the calmer, self assured and assertive man can always take her away.

Violent men get arrest records. Calm men get degrees and other accomplishments.

Which is more powerful of an attractant? And to what type of girl are you trying to be attractive? Those are the questions.

jason69 · Answer

Its really a subjective choice. Everybody has different priorities. Personally, the females I have and had in my life, are of the opinion that my agressiveness as a turn on.

By agressiveness, I don't mean that I will fight at every chance I get. I will try my best to avoid fight even if I am a black belt.

I guess a guy should have enough courage and aggression to protect his girl. And protection doesn't have to be violent every time.

Anonymous · Answer

"men who would knock out other men at the drop of a hat" sounds more like men with anger management problems. If these men who would knock out other men at the drop of a hat""can do that, what is to stop them from losing it and knocking out his girlfriend, partner or just another girl ?

Anonymous · Answer

calmer and assertive man definitely. I'm sorry but I can't stand short-tempered people -.- its so annoying how they're all dramatic about the silliest things. I dated a guy who got really pissed just by talking to someone who disagrees with him about football. in my opinion... they're being silly.

ThatBritishLad · Answer

I tried that once at the Old Surrey Hounds, when this biggun tried to pick a fight with a young lady... Two seconds later I found out it was her mother, and after an additional Seven seconds she was half way through inserting the pub bands guitar in me D: (She'd had a much better chance if she used the neck-end ^^;)

madmisskelly · Answer

Not at all.

Its one thing if he defended us on an occasion or two where there was a reason to fight.

However, a man who fights at the drop of a hat is a loose cannon, and not the kind of guy I would date.

sweet_18 · Answer

Not really. I think it's sexy if a man knows how to fight, but fighting "at the drop of hat" is immature and a turnoff

JustChris · Answer

I think most women would agree that they find a calm assertive man attractive and a violent man not attractive. So I conclude that they would prefer a calm assertive man rather than a violent man.

xxxmegan · Answer

I think anyone who flips out over nothing is ridiculous. It's not a matter of being calmer or more assertive. It's all about self control. Who wants a crazy person?

ac3ybraina · Answer

Calm and assertive most definitely is more attractive to me. If a guy can express that something another man says or does offends him without becoming violent, it shows his level of maturity. However, being able to knock another guy out if he takes it too far is always a bonus. :)

Prof_Don · Answer

Females like knowing the guy they're with can physically protect them from other men when need be...but being a "loose cannon" is, to most females, too much of a good thing.

kmhco · Answer

Not at all. I prefer a calmer more zen like approach to life. A man like that would not be conducive to that particular lifestyle.

may04 · Answer

No I do not. It shows that they have anger management problems and need to learn how to deal with them as a real adult.

selfishstars · Answer

No, violence and short-tempers aren't attractive to me. I would prefer a calmer, assertive man.

kdizzleforizzle91 · Answer

That would turn me off completely. I prefer the calmer, yet assertive type that you mentioned.

bunnyfrancis · Answer

idk about short tempered, but I like a guy that can take of himself and me if it was needed.

Yeahhbro · Answer

It is for girls that didn't get enough daddy attention when they were small...say what?

mcrfanawesomeband · Answer

I like a man who can get jealous or who can get angry over something and get in a fight, but I don't want that as a daily occurrence. A guy with a hot head over everything is not attractive, but at the right times...oh yeah, that turns me on.

youllthinkofme · Answer

I'm pretty go with the flow so I'd like to be with someone like that too,

Anonymous · Answer

Women don't like guys that have tantrums but they like strong capable men

Anonymous · Answer

i would believe they are to a lot of them, but not all

Zander · Answer

Um lol at this question.

Anonymous · Answer

Hot head is not attractive.

JessC03 · Answer

calm assertive man all the way.

Anonymous · Answer

calm and assertive, definitely.

ihatetakingcharge · Answer

i'm sure to many they are

Lj236 · Answer

i would guess they find it not attractive

SandraSlip · Answer

Not to me, no.

MomentoMori · Answer

nope. not at all.

Agent_Mouse · Answer

I hope not.

Anonymous · Answer

No I don't like them

merrygoround · Answer

NO NOT AT ALL

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