My boyfriend lied about his age by 16years. I'm in love with him - what to do?

[Anonymous]

omg so this guy that I've been dating for the pass 6 months who I thought was 27 is actually 43! I'm 19. I know yall are thinking this is fake and that there is no way that I could not have known his real age but he actually looks younger than 27! ask anyone that knows or met him. I found his id and asked him he told me the truth about it. its been his life for the past 10 years, he was tired of explaining to people that he was born and 65 so he went by the age people said he looked. anyways he said he was going to tell me when he was going to ask me to marry him, he fessed up to his lie. we have a few cries together (on the phone, he has been in WA for the pass 2 weeks visiting his mom. will be back in a few hours) I'm going to pick him up from the airport. should I continue seeing him or not. all opinions appreciated. he's my first love and real relationship.

[regular-guy]

My sister-in-law was caught in a very similar situation and it turned out very badly. A 40 something man who would lie to pick up a 19 or 20 something girl is probably not the pick of the litter. The lying is actually a big deal and should not be ignored. It sets the stage right away that he is comfortable with deception to get his way. Also, if he is 43 going after a 19 year old the odds are that he is probably either immature, very superficial and youth/beauty focused, or too insecure to attract women of his own age and is utilizing the age/experience differential in his favor.

My sister-in-laws boyfriend did turn out to be immature, unstable, controlling, and abusive...but he seemed so charming at first.

[Gorce]

Its possible I guess. I am 41 and everyone thinks I am 32. If I lost wieght and shaved my mustache I could probably pass for a 28 year old.

[spottedwolf]

Girl I am sorry but this man is a lost cause. A relationship is built on trust and if it started with a lie think about how it might end. What in the hell does a 43 year old man want woth a 19 year old. You need to kick him to the curb and find someone your age. True my father was 19 years older than my mother and was actually 1 year older than my grandmother, but he did not lie about it, she new without haveing to snoop. and by the way that is a 23 year difference, hell he might have daugher older than you.

[Shlei3]

Kiss this guy goodbye. That's is a huge age difference that will be especially apparent down the road when you want to go out and have fun and he is more of a homebody because he's physically too tired to do things. I can't see how people with 16 years in between them can have things in common unless he is very immature and you are somehow really mature.

[Anonymous]

My honest opinion is that you should not continue to see this guy. That's a huge thing to lie. A person who says that he started going by the age that people said he looks like has some major issues. Who knows what else he could be lying about? He was going to tell you when he plans to propose? Is he serious? That's ridiculous.

[jacquesvol]

A gross lie thus... link

What's next? That he forgot to tell about his wife and three kids?

Keep seeing him to discover all the truth?

[Anonymous]

Wow, from the little information in the post, he seems super manipulative. He was going to tell you when he proposed? Say wahhh? Normal, decent people come clean BEFORE asking for such a huge commitment from someone they love. Did he have a ring? My guess is not. Sorry, but he only said that because it's flattering to hear. He used it so you wouldn't be mad at him. Run fast. Find a guy that respects you enough to tell the truth.

[spyderman]

Haha.. a man lies... what else is new?

[JustDance]

A guy and a girl tried to elope from Afghanistan because their parents didn't approve but they were caught and then killed in front of a mosque by Talebans. Also, its snowing in April.

[jacquesvol]

Yeah, and the snow falls up this year. It rises out of the ground to reach the clouds. And Elvis lives.