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Believe a Positive Attitude is a Choice
This step is hard to take at first. It's easy to think that people were either positive or negative. It's easy to blame your negativity on all kinds of outside forces like fate, experiences, parents, relationships, etc, without really stopping to think that you can choose to be positive.
Teaching yourself that positivity is a choice has been one of the greatest things you can ever do for yourself.
When you find myself in a bad situation, know that it’s up to you to find the good, to be positive regardless of what’s happening around you. Stop pointing fingers and placing blame. Realise that everything happens how it happens, and it’s up to you to choose how I want to feel about it. You are in control of your attitude, and no one can take that away from you.
Look For the Positive in Life
In every person, in every situation, there is something good. Usually it’s not obvious. Sometimes we have to look pretty hard to find it. Unfortunately it's easy to just sit back and just glance around and go with the negative feeling if you see it. Take it as a challenge to find one good thing the happiness everyday.
When you're faced with a difficult or challenging situation, think to yourself, “What is good about this?” No matter how terrible the situation might seem, you can always find something good if you take the time to think about it.
Everything, good and bad, is a learning experience so, at the very least, you can learn from bad experiences. However, there’s usually even more to it than that. If you really take the time to look, you will usually find something good, something genuinely positive, about every person or situation.
Don’t Make A Mountain Out Of A Molehill
It’s very easy to lose perspective, especially if you are stressed and you are going too fast. And so a molehill can become a big and terrifying mountain in your mind. To prevent creating a mountain out of a molehill:
a. Say stop. In your mind, shout “STOP!” or “NOPE, we are not going down that path again!” as soon as thoughts of this kind starts to spin in your head.
b. Breathe. After you have disrupted the thoughts by shouting stop sit down and just be still. Breathe with your belly and focus on just your in-breaths and out-breaths for a minute or two to calm your mind and body down.
c. Refocus. Question your mountain building thoughts by talking to someone close to you and getting a more grounded perspective on the situation by getting their input. Or simply ask yourself "Will this matter in 5 years? Or even 5 weeks?" to widen your perspective and to chill out.
Exercise Regularly, Eat Well And Get Enough Sleep
This is very obvious of course.
There's a big impact a good night’s sleep or good workout can have when your thoughts are pessimistic and have lots of tensions on the inside.
It's also much simpler to think clearly and optimistically when my belly is not empty.
So it's best to be careful about these basic habits that may sound boring. Because they do have a huge effect on you depending on how you manage them.
Go Slowly
When we go too fast, when we try to think, talk, eat and move around in our world really quickly then things don’t go too well.
Stress builds up. Negative thoughts about just about anything start to well up and we feel like our own personal power decreases.
But if we slow down just for a few minutes (even if we have to force it by walking, talking and eating slower) then our mind and body calms down too. It becomes easier to think things through clearly again and easier to find the optimistic and constructive perspective.
Reinforce Positivity in Yourself
The best and easiest way to do this is to be positive when it comes to who you are. Tell yourself you’re amazing. Tell yourself you look pretty/hansom. Tell yourself you did a great job at work/school or raising your kids or whatever it is you do.
Be honest with yourself, but do your best to look for the good. And, whatever you do, focus on the positive. It’s okay to not like everything about yourself, but focus on what you like. We all have positive attributes, and it’s up to you to remind yourself of them every day.
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