I'm really depressed and I don't know what to do?

[Anonymous]

I'm a 10th grade girl who moved to a new town. It's been a year and it's been the lonliest year of my life. I've had depression and bad insecurities since middle school. I used to get into fights but now I'm really shy and introverted. I tried joining clubs but I can't find myself talking to people easily. I've barely made any friends and it's embarrassing. My mom and I get into fights and we're having financial issues right now. I don't want to be known as the loner at school but I find myself being really distant from people and not knowing or running out of things to talk about. It's just really uncomfortable. I'm sick and tired of being sad and having anxiety and I just want to end it all. There have been times I've really thought of committing suicide. And I haven't because of how much pain my family would go through. But I was so lonely and depressed this whole year, it's tiring.

[Anonymous]

First off, I have been in your shoes. I had acne and braces and glasses, and I was the girl in middle school who people would put as the "ugly" girl in that game "mash" where you draw the spiral and then count through lists of things to see what and who you'll end up with. I never had a boyfriend until I was 18 in college, so I always felt ugly, and I was always smart, so I was called a geek and an overachiever. I never had any friends, only acquaintances who tolerated me and honestly used me a lot for help. All of my life through 12th grade was painful. I'd cry a lot. And I considered suicide too. I didn't even bother with clubs bc I knew they were a waste of time for me. But what can help is having hobbies and things outside of school, not related to school at all, that you enjoy. Take walks outside. Find a foreign language you're into and start learning that. Get to know yourself and who you are so that when you enter college, you can be confident and start looking for a guy. (No guy is relationship material in high school, trust me.) Also know that everyone in high school is hating it. Try not to care about what everyone else is doing. Because the perfect, popular lives they portray are often just a coping mechanism for a lot of shit going on at home. And they are really underneath sad and unhappy too. Focus on your future & your grades and surviving, because that's what matters. College is 10x better than high school, I promise. You are capable and deserving of life and happiness and it all starts from within.

[Anonymous]

Hey, your question jumped out to me because I went through the exact same thing in grade 9/10.

I moved to a new town and was popular at my school before but this time around was different. I didn't know anyone and actually started to get bullied a little bit. I started piercing my face and shaving my head just making myself look crazy and people left me alone. I started coming to school drunk (drink my aunts liquor cabinet booze) and pop tabs of e in the bathroom. People were actually scared of me at that point and eventually I created my own group of "bad asses" people who idolized me and wanted to be like me because I didn't give a fuck what people though. This didn't really help my lonliness though. I still felt empty inside. You have to find peace within your own company. That itch for someone else to be there to fill the void will never fully go away so until you can learn to be patient and enjoy your own company while doing things you love then it's going to be tough. Try to distract yourself as much as possible and please don't do what I did (drinking and drugs) as it actually lead to a lot of unnecessary pain and suffering later on. I actually dropped out. Things will be okay... please never even consider suicide. I used to cut myself punch myself in the face, rip my hair out. You should talk to someone about this because someone might be able to help you. A family member, school counselor. Don't keep it bottled inside.

[SomeGuy37]

Ok, I'm not biting on the 'suicide thing' because you have so many opportunities, and that's just last decade's call for help! You are better than that!! I was raised with rather 'Tough Love' from my dad, but I think you need something different!
Do you have an internet connection? If so, MEET FRIENDS THERE!!! I have ladies I flirt with in Australia and New Zealand, and England, Poland and Russia!!
Just get online and Google your interest!!
Are you a Star Trek Nerd? MILLIONS out there, to talk to!!! Do you like something simple, like quilting? Tens of thousands, also interested!
I doesn't matter where you are, if you can connect to the internet!! Anything you LOVE has HUNDREDS, maybe THOUSANDS, or MILLIONS, loving it too!!!
Find them, online, and talk with them.
Then find yourself a soft stuffed cuddly animal friend, for when you sleep I haven't seen any Serious Studies, but I know A LOT of people, men and women, single, that have a soft, cuddly sleeping friend!! You are NEVER too old for a teddy bear, or other soft cuddly friend!

[Song4TheBroken]

I'm sorry you've felt like this for so long. I know what it feels like to be lonely with no friends. Do you have any hobbies?

[Asker]

Yeah, I guess that can help

[Song4TheBroken]

i strongly recommend you learn to play an instrument if you don't already play one ^.^

[Cthulhu]

Talk to people, people you sit next to, who are across the room, doesn't matter. Anxiety sucks and is so hard to get over sometimes, but the best thing is to just reach out. Just say hi to someone, make conversation, even if its just so painfully awkward. I mean what are they gonna do? Call the cops? destroy the world? They could feel weird but who cares, their opinion of you doesn't mean anything unless you want it to. Maybe you'll find someone just as shy, or anxious, or lonely as you are. You'd be surprised how many are out there.
Don't ever give up, there are a lot of people out there you can annoy the shit out of, and some of them will end up just loving you for it.

[Checkers82]

Do you want to pm me? I've been through and am kind of still going through a lot of depression and anxiety so if you need to chat I'm here for you.

[Asker]

Thank you :)

[alaysatlorp]

Just focus on studies and no anything else. It is most important! Don't think about suicide there's always a better way out.

[Mario21]

Hey hey hey I know just how u feel :( we can talk if u want :)