Is it really unhealthy for me to suppress my anger and frustration all the time?

[Anonymous]

Just wondering. I used to have a bad temper during my early teen years. Now I control it better. However, it's still not pretty when either someone actually tries to piss me off or when I'm very frustrated with something. I suppress those feelings because I don't want to give people problems or give myself any more problems then I've already had with my life. When I suppress my anger somewhere very isolated and private, I might end up throwing one punch at wall to help let some of my anger go without causing trouble. I'm not a violent person if that's what you're thinking (I only resort to violence if someone tries to hurt me or hurt the people I care for or if they constantly threaten and harass me nonstop without letting me go).

Every time I suppress my deep angry, I end up feeling soreness and irritation in some parts of my internal organs (my intestines, etc.) and a bit of a headache.

Yes

No

Other suggestions

[Honest-Matt]

I'm going to get all psychiatric here. Have you ever considered that the idea of stress as something tangible and able to build up or hold back is a manufactured behaviour? If we believe that our stress can be held back but is only going to come back and burst out later. Then we will project that behavioural symptom. When people say, 'just let it go', does it just go away. When we sleep off our anger and we wake up fresh and feeling fine, where did it go?

The mindset that we believe our stress will bottle up and we can or have to release it is a concept we accepted to be true; but it can be entirely a self-driven perception and behaviour.

In actuality it's more likely that our built up stress is our past trauma coming back as we recall it in our thoughts; usually in stressful situations, adding to stress. What that means is that outbursts and relieving stress are not the solution; and contemplating your past stress and coming to terms with it to put it behind you is the best solution to living with less stress.

Deal with what's bothering you, stress itself has physical symptoms. I've had my jaw go numb for instance. Talk yourself through what's angering you, be fair to yourself and be realistic. Reason why you need to let it bother you. We have no reason to let anger or stress bother us beyond the event that caused it. You won't be successful at diffusing your stress right away. Like everything else in life, it takes practice.

[Truthatanycost]

There is no need to suppress anything, just channel it into a workout and use that energy to build mass, strength and health. Punching a wall is channeling excess energy in a negative and damaging way.

[Idonthaveausername]

Anger is stressful and suppressing it is even more stressful. Obviously stress is detrimental to your health. I used to have these kinds of anger problems and they physically caused insomnia, ulcers, headaches, general stress and tension. Coupled with whiplash, I have permanent scar tissue in my neck from being so tense as a child and teen. Suppressing your anger will eat you alive. Stress can also cause diarrhea, heart attacks, strokes, and many other harmful side effects.

[Idonthaveausername]

Thanks for making me MHO.

When you have anger issues, people and shrinks aren't going to help you. The best thing to do is find an outlet for it.

I use art as my main outlet for the built up stuff and also snuggling with my pets to calm myself down. I use stress balls and flexing my hands and breathing exercises if I'm in a stressful/angering situation like a bad day at work. Some people exercise, dance, cook, write, draw, paint, work on demolition sites for renovations, martial arts, meditation, get into a regular sleep routine, eat healthier, and do many more things to reduce stress and anger.

The best way I can tell if I'm angry or not is to bite my tongue hard. If it hurts, then I'm not too angry and it shocks me out of it. If it doesn't hurt, then I know I need to separate myself from the situation and take a breather

[BellePepper]

In most situations it is better to avoid getting angry. But you also need to find productive way to deal with your emotions or they will make you sick.

And no. Punching a wall or destroying property does not count as productive. Go work out, play music, do something about the situation, write about it, or do something else.

[AskNaz]

Opposite of express is depress.
So let some of the emotions go.
Just do it somewhere private and not an action that may upset someone.
For example, screaming into a pillow or punching it may help and won't upset anyone

[RainbowFanGirl]

Yes because all of that bottled up tension can lead to you snapping and exploding on someone. Let your answer out through other means such as punching a pillow, talking to someone, etc. It's not good to feel like that.

[Tanairy328]

if you don't let it out, eventually you're going to explode. Maybe you should get a punching bag, something to help release your anger.

[rjroy3]

Only if you don't have an outlet of some kind. That energy needs to go somewhere and it can damage you if you don't.

[Anonymous]

You should let it out sometimes because we don't need anymore school shooters