Why is he copying me?

[Anonymous]

this guy that broke up w me because he “had to get his life together” immediately got a new girlfriend after leaving me but is copying me loudly …. like he is on my social media page copying my hobbies… he’s blocked but still watches my social media to copy me …. like literally he goes to the same locations i do and recreate my photos as if it’s his idea… he even takes my other hobbies and recommends them to other men as if he is so passionate about it …… why is he copying me? it’s been years …. 3 to be exact … and he is performing… me… like a weird cosplay

[Anonymous]

Some people don't have a strong sense of who they are. They shop for a personality by adopting the traits, hobbies, and tastes of people they admire or envy. By copying you, he is trying to absorb the qualities he liked in you.

Even though he's blocked, copying you is a way to stay tethered to your life. It is a form of hoovering or keeping tabs; by living your life, he ensures he is always thinking about you and, ideally, that you are always thinking about him.

Stay protected.

[Asker]

wow !! this is so creepy …. so he doesn’t want a reaction? i thought this was like mind games to scare me , but he is lost? should i delete my hobbies from my account?

[Opinion Owner]

It is definitely creepy, and your instinct that it feels like mind games isn't wrong it’s just that the game is more about validating himself than it is about scaring you.

Instead of deleting what you love, consider making your accounts completely private for a few months. If he has no blueprint to follow, he will eventually have to find someone else to mimic because he can't innovate on his own.

[Asker]

ok i will !!! thank you!!!

[Asker]

if you don’t mind me asking , referring to when you said, envy or admiration. if he thinks I’m admirable, he would’ve stayed with me? But it grew into envy. Is that why he broke up with me? if you could just guess I guess

[Opinion Owner]

I think he didn't stay because you were a mirror reflecting back his own insecurities. Now that he’s gone, he’s trying to become the mirror himself.

[strateguy632]

Because he thinks you do the coolest things.