Male coworker liked me and now avoids me?

[Lottemarine123]

Over the past 10 months I have intermittently had contact with a male coworker. It initiated after he set up a meeting about a project I was due to work on and then it was dropped as a priority, still he still wanted to meet me. After that I didn’t really see for a few months and then recently he did a presentation at our team meeting and our eyes were locked. He stared at me constantly and it felt like we were the only people in the room. Since then I’ve found we lock eye contact regularly and gaze deeply into each others eyes, sometimes not talking and sometimes we do.

I have also noticed him checking me out from a distance, when he did this he looked down immediately, as if a bit embarrassed he got caught.

fast forward, we work together intermittently and he is always super helpful. I send him a teams message and he usually responds super quick. Not that it means anything but lately he had tended to heart emoji my messages. Fast forward to last Friday the Christmas work party and we talked a lot, it did seem a bit reserved, I’m not sure if he is shy. He seems to chat easily to other girls in the team, but slightly awkward with me.

That night he also found out I have a boyfriend, I know I’m not proud of it, but I can’t help but have feelings for this guy, though I have never acted on it.

Since then at work he has been avoidant and seems to be direct on messager without the friendliness etc.

what is happening? I like him a lot and miss him. Although it sounds awful, I would be willing to quit my current relationship for him, but he seems gone.

[Purpleronnie]

Number 1 , this is at work
Number 2 , this is at work
Number 3 , this is at work
Number 4 , you’re in a relationship.
Number 5 , you’re in a relationship.
Number 6, you’re in a relationship.


Sorry if you think my reply is childish but so are your actions in my opinion.


How is the guy to act in this scenario? Risk being pulled aside or fired for inappropriate behaviors or sexual harassment. You seem to blame him for not being receptive to you but from the data you gave , all of it is inferred with nothing coming from him directly via his lips or yours. You like the guy so much but can’t bring yourself to speak to him? 😂 is this middle school?


You’re in a relationship , presumably a physical one but who knows ! .. yet you secretly harbor feelings for another. You’re not going to win girlfriend of the year are you? . And what if your man finds out? What then … deny it? Would make work really awkward for you both right? Maybe one or both of you has to find a new job ? … still worth it?


I would avoid you , I would run a mile in the opposite direction. What hope would he have for a strong relationship with you when you’re thinking this way having a b/f at home?


At the very least end this real relationship you have and go talk to the work guy. Neither deserve this emotional neglect or torture.

[Drumlin2001]

You need to do your boyfriend a favour and end relationship.

[SueShe]

Simply put, he realized that you are emotionally cheating on your boyfriend and he is a decent guy, not wanting to be the cause of a breakup with you and your boyfriend.

You are obviously not really very faithful to your boyfriend and for you, that word has not really a meaning since you are willing to jeopardize your current relationship with him.

This co-worker has a sense of dignity and did not want to be the cause of frictions or even a break up, something that you are willing to consider, accept and even promote.

He is right to avoid you because it would make thinks only odd.

[katiesmuff]

Seems to me you were the one playing a very dangerous game here. If you were unhappy with your boyfriend where you were in a monogamous relationship it is pretty easy to see how your work relationship with that guy from work would change.
You should now confess to your boyfriend that you tried being a tramp but once the mark found out he backed away from you. Then your boyfriend could tell you to Fuck Off and leave you.

[EmmaMary]

For fuck's sake just go up to this guy and ask/beg him to give you a damn good fucking... Simples!

Then perhaps you can start Growing Up and acting your age. smh

[In_Trance]

This is retarded.
Get back to work before you get written up

[Anonymous]

Talk to him