My wife wants to give me a one year anniversary gift that is a little unsettling to me... please help?

[Anonymous]

So my wife brought up the other day that as a one year anniversary gift she would like to get some professional photos taken of her in a risqué baseball theme photo shoot for me, because she thinks I would find it very sexy as I am a former high level baseball player. I honestly would find it sexy and I love the fact that she wants to do this for me and have them blown up and put up on the walls of my man cave. I am just having a little trouble with this. I am not ok with someone else (especially another man, gay or straight) seeing my wife partially or half nude and the idea of it makes me sick to my stomach. The other unsettling part of this is that I am afraid of these pictures being part of a photographer's future portfolio or just the idea that our copies may not be the only ones. I would be so upset if they made their way onto the Internet because a photographer had no professionalism.

Am I wrong to feel this way? I did not tell her no yet, but I did tell her it makes me feel a little uncomfortable and my concerns as well. Is this something that women think about doing for their husbands? I have never heard of women asking their husbands if they would like something like this. I am just worried about her safety and her integrity as a women, my wife, and a human being. Please, husbands and wives let me know what you think about this and please include your experiences if you have any.

[gray_sailor]

I agree with the idea of securing the services of a female photographer.

As far as display goes, here is something from my past experience. When I was in the US Navy, my first ship was the USS California. In the chief's mess (eating / lounging area for senior enlisted), there was an oil painting of the Playboy Playmate centerfold from month when the ship's keel was laid. It was on display most of the time, except during inspections, or when we had visitors. Then, a curtain was drawn in front of it to conceal it from view. The curtain was well chosen so it did not seem to even be there. It just blended into the surrounding wall.

TLDR
It's possible to be clever using concealing displays.

[Red_Arrow]

It is actually quite common. And many of the photographers are women for the reasons you are worried about. Just Google boudoir photography and you will see what I mean.

[Engageme]

It is very common and I would do it. I haven't due to finances but it's a great gift idea to me
I understand your concern, but she can find a female photographer if that would help. Also, you usually sign papers related to privacy and they are legally binding so that person could lose their practice and go to jail. Find one together and ask for references.

[Anonymous]

Would it make you feel better if your wife went to a female photographer? You could also probably ask for full-rights to the photos in the contract, so they wouldn't be allowed to use those images without your express permission. If you had that clause, and the pictures were somehow reproduced that would be a no-brainer lawsuit.

[Cookies_AndMilk]

Well I've haven't been married but if it is something that is concerning you why don't you suggest the idea of you being the one taking the pictures. I'm not sure if there's some professional equipment you could rent but maybe that would be a fun activity for the two of you to do together, plus it's sort of bonding time.

[DodgersGM]

I think you can assuage most of these fears by telling her to hire the best, most professional person she can find.

Also, cherish your wife, man. That's an awesome gift!

[ginnyweasley]

if you are uncomfortable get a girl photographer or (this idea is very popular on pinterest) look up poses on pinterest and do the poses yourself

[complicated_soul]

You are not wrong.

Share your concerns with her.

I find them reasonable.

[NotMyUsername15]

I disagree with the idea. Photographers are still men and if your wife is attractive, I can almost guarantee you they'll keep a copy of a picture for them.

[Sara413]

Totally understand where you're coming from and I bet your wife will too. Is there perhaps a gooe friend she could go to tgat you guys trust?

[JennieF]

I had some taken for my husband, and he loved them.

He's a former baseball player too, by the way.

[Anonymous]

take them yourself as that would be more fun and safer.

[ShaeNielson]

You're worried for her safety and integrity for getting half nude pictures of herself taken, by a professional photographer? Please be kidding..-.-'

[Asker]

Nope, I am not kidding. Sorry.

[RebeccaSJ]

Hubby loves mine.