Firstly, we don't really know much of the guy in particular so we can only judge from our own view or steroetypes. So take comments with scoops of salt.
Here are my thoughts:
- Generally, men are more practical thinking. So it could be that for him the wedding is not so exciting in itself as it has more to do with status and gestures.
For him it might be that the wedding is just a symbol that cements a commitment (to you, himself and maybe also to a God) and that the cermony itself is just an excuse to have a grand party.
- Depending on what culture you live in and how you relationship is set up it might also be an economic expense that he is supposed to handle, in such a case he might not be thinking much of how he want the wedding to be grand and unique but more on how much he will have to put out (he's being practical). So in a sense he might not want to interfere in your excitment as he might be stuck in a serious mood.
- Maybe he's simply not the type to have a lot of ideas around imagining how the wedding should be. He might not be into that type of designing. He leaves it to you to get your way.
- He might be nervous just thinking about it. Being on stage like that, the attention, the expectations.
- Then there might also be some cold feet. It's only natural to wonder and worry.
He sounds like he has my mind on this. I let my wife do whatever she wanted. I couldn’t care less if there’s flowers or not. Where the cake is placed. Who sits where. What the food will be. That type of stuff is agonizing to me to figure out and plan out. I also get no joy out of any of it. So, whatever made her happy with wedding stuff made me happy. Frankly I got no aptitude in this area. I got no business being involved at all. I know that. I can’t match napkins to table cloths or pick out appropriate floral print. This is one thing I feel women generally excel over men at. So I know my role in this. Dish out the cash. Let her make it how she wants. Let her have her fun. My fun comes when the wedding is over and the ceremony stuff is done, which I hate and it’s time to enjoy cocktails and socialize and dance and party a little. You let me plan something like that and I’m all: “dinner…. idk……pizza delivery? No? How about water buffalo steaks? Plus I think you gals love planning that type of thing. So if he’s like me he’s content to let you have your fun.
To me a wearing suit and her in a respectable dress with the minister in the backyard is ample. I don’t care about pomp and pageantry. I hate being in formal ceremonies. I was excited to get married. I don’t care about the rest. All I cared is no mom/groom dance. I wasn’t dancing with my mom period. It’s weird.
My guy tells me he doesn't know what's sadder, weddings or funerals. lol
Your guy will love being married to you, but that doesn't mean he will like the ceremonial process. He will be just thinking about the buffalo wings and beer at the reception, and of course, your honeymoon.
I would hope when I do eventually meet a guy and a few years after we've been together we decide to get married that he would be excited and eager. Personally, if my future husband is not ecstatic and excited with me then he isn't the one lol.
Opinion
44Opinion
The reasons men often aren't excited for marriage are these:
1. He is taking a huge risk unless she signs a prenuptial agreement first, though she will likely get angry with him if he suggests it so if she wants to treat him well she should offer it up front.
2. He often is the one paying for it so it just means he will have to work that much harder for more years to pay off a one day event.
3. He is expected to get her a ridiculously expensive ring which is a huge waste of money. (For example, one of my friends had to get his wife a $6,000 ring when he got married and she got him an $80 ring)
4. Nobody usually cares what the man wants for the wedding (location, which guests are invited, decorations, etc.) and if they ask his opinion they go with something else instead.
Wedding Day is for the bride. The groom is just part of the festivities. He's being very smart to leave it up tp you, the bride.
I think also there's a difference between how men and women view weddings. Women view a wedding as a big event to celebrate the end of her being single, while men view it as a beginning of a long-term relationship, which is more important than the wedding itself.
Weddings are stressful. I honestly couldnt wait till it was over. The people, families, schedules, photographer times, food, wife wanting eveything to be magical and perfect... hell its a reason not to get divorced cuz i would not wanna do it again...
Both of you MUST…PLEASE… read together Ephesians 5. Don’t cheat as you both need to feel the pressures of Marriage in real time together. DO IT TOGETHER AT SAME TIME.
It will make your life more difficult initially in that it should heighten stress levels. LONGTERM that chapter and 1 Peter saves marriages. Marriage and Couple Psychology/Counseling emerged from Ephesians 5.
I've never been married, but if I were engaged I would be more than excited to get married. That being said, I'm in the camp that it is her big day. Guys don't dream about their marriage and how it goes down. That's all you. We want you to plan out that big day you've been dreaming about. We're just happy to tie the knot.
I imagine it would be exciting right up until the planning phase because the woman's going to get really excited and I bet that's when it's going to sink in that you're stuck with this chick for the rest of your life.
Probably start seeing everything a little differently. I'm sure it's a little jarring.
No. It’s not fun, it’s all stress and costs a lot of money. You’ve been planning this since you were 5…. We just decided we can handle it yesterday.
Men have ran from commitment our whole life, while you’ve been looking for it. The wedding party is fun… all the other customs aren’t.
The wedding is for the bride, he’s doing it to make you happy, he’s asked you to marry him because you’re the only person that’s ever made it not terrifying and actually make sense.
Don’t try to project your excitement. If you want him to have an opinion narrow what you want down to 2 options and ask his opinion of this or that.
Of course they get excited but he’s a guy naturally he’s not too interested with the wedding planning and wants to make you happy. It’s more of a girly thing.
They often are excited, but not to the same extents as a woman. The whole world is abiding to woman's dreams about marriage, all the way from they was a girl. Men never had that, so of course they won't get the same amount of excitement from it.
The average man hell no. Biggest mistake of his life, he knows it and for some reason he's doing it anyways. Typically he's not had sex with you yet and he's excited to marry his virgin bride. But none of you women do that these days and instead you only get weak simps you can shame into marriage who are not excited about it for husbands.
Weddings aren’t about the men. It’s always been shot the women. It’s a protection for women after all. Which is why I’m never getting married
the action is exciting, but the planning and ballache of that generally isn't.
I've never been married, but I can say that it's probably WAY more exciting for women because it's generally ALL about them, even though you're a couple lol. The entire focus is on the bride. The groom just has to be there lol.
I'd say they are more nervous about not making a fool of themselves in front of the extended family >.<
Generally no
I have to be slightly rarer because a little piece of me actually planned enough to give a shit despite it looking increasing unlikely to ever happen at all
We don't give a shit tbh, it's really your deal. Doesn't mean we aren't happy about it, just not our thing.
Most of us would be fine in the courthouse honestly.. Weddings are about you.
On top of that getting married is a huge risk and very stressful. I think I'd have a similar response
Honestly no. He certainly loves you and is looking forward to living his life for you.
But this wedding is a chore that we have to go through for you chicks. So you can’t force us to go and ask us to be excited about it.
I was pretty excited about going on the honeymoon. It was amazing. I still think about it.
hell yeah, it’s their biggest moment in their lives besides the birth of their kids
