Engaged/married men, did you get an engagement ring? Engaged/married women, did you get your fiance/husband an engagement ring?

Question

On my latest Mytake a user said any engaged couple he's seen they were both wearing engagement rings. I've only even seen men wearing wedding bands.. Made me curious how many guys have gotten engagement rings.

Should men also get promise rings or engagement rings? Or should we just do away with engagement rings all together?

Lliam · Accepted Answer

It's usually the man who "pops the question". At that point, he offers the woman a ring to seal the deal if she accepts. The ring is a sign that he is serious, and it is visual proof of his commitment. It's not a bribe or a dowry.

The classic tradition is cliche but charming. You know, the guy gets down on one knee, offers a ring, and asks her to marry him. The guy would prepare ahead of time by shopping for a (surprise) ring and psyching himself up. He'd plan when and where he would propose. He'd rehearse how he was going to do it and what he was going to say. He'd be all nervous when he proposed. After all, it's the biggest commitment he will ever make in his life. It's a once in a lifetime moment and one to be remembered and cherished. She is giddy when he surprises her and asks for her hand in marriage.

How would a woman be prepared to "exchange" rings if she wasn't sure if or when he was going to pop the question? Again, it's usually a surprise.

The thing is, though, an engagement ring 'was' usually just simple gold band that would not compete with the eventual wedding ring. Or the engagement and wedding rings could compliment each other as a set. The woman's wedding ring usually had a diamond in a prong setting. It didn't cost as much as a car.

In my opinion, an engagement ring should absolutely NOT be a display of wealth or status. As long as it's high quality (real gold), the cost of the ring is not an indication of how much he loves her. It merely means that he wants to share the rest of his life with her. Women who want a status symbol to show off are crass and mercenary. I wouldn't trust a woman like that.

I didn't get an engagement ring. I can't think of any men who do. The thought never crossed my mind. How would that work? After she accepted his proposal, would she rush out any buy a ring of equal value for the guy to pay him back?

Are there guys these days, you know, the kind of weak-ass bitches who whine about feminism and won't buy dinner for a date for fear of being taken advantage of, who would want an engagement ring just to make sure that they were benefiting equally? ("Mommy. She got a present and I didn't!" 😭) To them, everything is transactional. "If I pay for her burger and fries, she at least owes me a BJ." Those kind of guys are damaged. They're not men at all.

Wedding rings are more expensive. Usually the man and woman shop for them together. My wife found a design on-line that she loved. It was finely wrought 18 carat gold but it had no stone. We had a jeweler add a couple of small, inset diamonds just to make it sparkly. It's feminine and elegant. I designed my own wedding ring and had it made. It's a manly ring. Even though it only has 5 small, different colored stones of equal size (our birth stones - red garnet and peridot, an emerald for Ireland, and a citrine to balance the colors, with a diamond in the center), it was more expensive because it's larger and contains more gold. I paid for her engagement and wedding rings and for my own. She paid for her wedding dress and made the wedding arrangements in which family and friends provided the lovely venue, did the decorating, and supplied the food and drink. We wanted it to be special, but we didn't waste money on ostentation. We spent money on our wonderful honeymoon and to building our future together.

Static_In_The_Attic · Accepted Answer

Oh Hell NO! The only rings I like are onion rings & when it comes to the weather marriage isn’t in the forecast.  I’ll Pass On The THREE RINGS. Engagement ring, wedding ring & suffering.

meetkitty123 · Accepted Answer

I don't understand the whole engagement ring thing. It seems like too much money to get an engagement ring then a wedding ring and a wedding band. My engagement ring was/ is my wedding ring. We just added the wedding bands.
Now as far as my husband I didn't buy him an "engagement" ring I skipped that and custom made his wedding band and then gifted it to him as a sign of our engagement. On our wedding we set our rings on the ring bearers pillow and while saying our vows we put them back on. Simple one set of rings needed.
Now prior to this relationship I had been engaged before. I was given an engagement ring. As far as I knew we had no plans on replacing it with a wedding ring. So it two was to be just one ring and a band. In the meantime I set off and put a ring on layaway which was to stand as an engagement ring and a wedding ring.
Another interesting story I just wrote about on another question as far as mens engagement rings. I bought a ring yellow and a touch of white gold 14k mens wedding band with a row of diamonds and my lover at the time turned it down. It was too flashy for him. He said he wanted something in a simpler inexpensive metal and in a different color. Well another blow to my little pride 🤷. But what was I to do if he didn't like the style of the ring? Nothing really because I bought it on a final Sale and it wasn't refundable.
Also I once purposed. I did so on Valentine's The ring was to be an engagement ring and the wedding ring. Anyhow I got turned down or he never actually said yes he beat around the bush making excuses. Oh well 🤷 I'm proof that women get turned down too.

shaysh87 · Accepted Answer

Personally i am not a traditionalist so i won't get him an engagement ring. I will just get a wedding ring for him and he will do the same for me. Its a waste of money to buy 2 rings

Its best to ask her to marry you without a ring first because once you buy the wrong size ring, you will have a very rough time returning it for another size at the store.

JustinTheGreat · Answer

I have an engagement ring but that’s because I’m married to a man so of course at least one of us was going to have one 😅
Now that I have my wedding band, I don’t wear it anymore though because they don’t really look good together. But I should just put it on a different finger I guess

Massageman · Answer

I got my wife a ruby-star-sapphire ring until we could pick out an engagement ring and wedding band set for her and a wedding band for me. I had several diamonds that had been in my family for several generations (gemologists note: even had some old "mine cuts"), so we picked the stones for our rings, then divided remainder equally for our two daughters so they could each have their rings made up with them. (I never had an "engagement ring".) In fact, for day-to-day wear since I am using my hands a lot for almost everything I do, I have a stainless steel "everyday band" I wear. If that gets lost or shmushed, I'm only out (the cost of ) a pound or two bacon! I'll wear my "real" ring to church, events such as weddings/ funerals, etc.

humanearth · Answer

We never did rings. Neither one of us wanted rings. But this time when we renew our wedding vows. We are getting a special engraved ring set.  She wants rings this time

EmmaMary · Answer

Both my boyfriend (now husband) and I got each other engagement rings, however since getting married he now only wears his wedding ring and keeps his engagement ring in it's box in the safe.

Slartybartfast · Answer

I paid for both. I spent $16,000 on the wedding/engagement ring (using a perfect half carrot blue diamond and six 1/4 carrot near flawless diamonds for the wedding ring ) and $1900 on a band for myself.

She kept the ring after the divorce, I wore mine for another ten years.

AviatorTom · Answer

For my marriage, I bought my fiancée an engagement ring. We went ring shopping together, and at the same place, I bought her engagement and wedding rings, and she bought my wedding ring. She did not buy me an engagement ring.

matchrestore · Answer

My wife gave me an engagement ring. It wasn't anything fancy or expensive since it would be shortly replaced by a wedding ring.

BCRanger10 · Answer

Yes, I did. But I didn't buy them. My mom gave me my dear departed grandmother's rings to give to my wife.

bolverk · Answer

Men rarely if ever receive Engagement Rings they are by tradition the giver.

The ‘Engagement Ring’ only became a thing when De Beers a company whose profits depend on diamond sales invented the Diamond Engagement Ring which went along with the slogan “A Diamond Is Forever.” in the 1940's. Before this an engagement ring was any ring at all of any substance in any style.

19magic · Answer

Tbh I'd probably get him something symbolic but not an engagement ring maybe a chain or bracelet of some kind (but if I'm not sure I would let him know he can exchange it for something more to his tastes).

Jaximus-Lion · Answer

No! I did not get an engagement ring. I don't wear any jewelry so i don't care really.

Whatever2929292 · Answer

I think that it depends. I don't think love should be measured in only material value

KatherineJ · Answer

I guess I never thought to buy him one. Was I supposed to? I mean our 10th anniversary is coming up, so should I?

exitseven · Answer

My wife and I were saving up to buy a hose and we thought an engagement ring was an unnecessary expense. A few years later I bought her a gold ring that had a few inlaid diamonds in it. She said she liked it but hardly ever wears it.

jahaims · Answer

I got my wife the engagement ring and we picked out our wedding bands together. I didn't bwear an engagement ring.

RavVid · Answer

I can't see guys getting away with not buying engagement rings any time soon. Here not that many guys wear wedding bands even. They are dangerous if you are in a physical job.

Sparkie460 · Answer

No I didn't get an engagement ring. I bought my wife one though.

Baylayy · Answer

The user who commented is mostly from South Asia cause they have arranged engagement where both partners share ring on a preplanned date

SaartjieJane · Answer

If I were engaged I’d want both myself and my partner to have an engagement ring. I like that

annabananna · Answer

My husband and I shopped together for wedding and engagement rings. He paid for them. I have an engagement and wedding band and he has a wedding band.

cth96190 · Answer

Hell no! I cannot wear rings anyway. My skin goes crazy and within 24 hours ulcers form beneath a ring.

TrueConfection · Answer

My husband gave me an engagement ring, but I did not give him one. It seems like the timing would have to be pretty good for both people to have an engagement ring readily available (simultaneously).

FilmGuy93 · Answer

I've always been told that the man doesn't get an engagement ring. But I guess that would only be true if the man proposes to the woman.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I think only Women should recieve engagement rings its more of a feminine thing

Surely · Answer

The type of jobs that I did and do now. Wearing any ring could cause a loss of my finger. To answer the question, No!

lucas262 · Answer

I dont understand 2 rings, the ring is pointless I only commit once why would I buy 2 rings that sounds like a rich person's problem.

Prettygurl12 · Answer

I did not buy my husband an engagement ring.

RuthlessAggression · Answer

A lot of couples will. But a lot of couples won't. There is no "requirement"

KrakenAttackin · Answer

A man wearing a wedding ring started during WW I, when wives wanted men to remember they were married instead of chasing whores... of course, there were very few whores in the trenches.

krin_m · Answer

I did not get one. I did give one though. Long time ago.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Only women wear engagement rings

CubaPirate · Answer

Absolutely I'm a traditionalists

woman_2004 · Answer

i never stoop that low

SiberFox · Answer

You're expecting too much out of women

jimmy2 · Answer

Yes we do

Anonymous · Answer

guys don't girls do

Engaged/married men, did you get an engagement ring? Engaged/married women, did you get your fiance/husband an engagement ring?

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Engaged/married men, did you get an engagement ring? Engaged/married women, did you get your fiance/husband an engagement ring?

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