Meaning that, women who are fundamentally "wife material" are found young and early by good men. So a woman who is 30+ and not married is, by definition, not "wife material".
Wow @KrakenAttackin what a f'ing good question. I often struggle with this one as well. I got married at 20 years old, and stayed married for 22 years. Divorced and 42 and have struggled with dating for last 4 years.
16 women, 2 serious relationships and honestly... it does seem to me that all the good women are taken by the age of 40. All the women I dated were over 40, I date women with kids, I dated women with pets, I dated divorced woman, never married women, women that never had kids, women that were widowed... and all the 30 somethings that are still single look at me like I am a creepy old fart... but hell, they are ones that are 30 something without kids and never married or divorced dad completely out of the picture. So, who do they honestly think they are? Why do they have this belief that they can act how they act, say what they say, and it should be okay? But if you do it then you are not deserving of them?
I hate to agree with this because it's so cynical. Honestly, I am 46 and I am single so what's that say about me?
But I had been in a 22-year marriage. So even though I divorced it was still a very successful relationship. My ex-wife and I accomplished so much together in 22 years. I worked so hard in that relationship, and I am still willing to do it again. I make 6 figures, I drive a nice car, I own my own place, I have zero debt no bills. No mental health issues, attractive and in outstanding physical shape and good health.
They don't care, honestly, they treat those things like it doesn't matter, so I have to ask myself... are all the good ones gone by 40?
I think they are.
113 Reply- +1 y
@DaveJord Dave, as you are finding out, there are no good women. You could move to Southeast Asia and find one there, but if you do, do NOT bring her back here as our culture and our women will corrupt her. Or - you could patronize prostitutes. This is cheaper and safer than dating. Or you could just become celibate.
All bad choices, but that is all there is - and it is better than dating landmines and hoping the one you ultimately choose is a dud. - +1 y
Good comment. I think the metrics are different for men as there are so many good men who are invisible to most women. Women in their 20's can almost pick a man, whereas men don't have that option.
- +1 y
- +1 y
- +1 y
- +1 y
By 40 most women are badly damaged by having been over-fucked, kids with no father figure, many badly failed relationships, and serious mental health issues. Men do much better alone than women. Being alone slowly drives women crazy.
- +1 y
We all want to find that special person, so I have not given up on that. But so far since divorce, in last four years, all that you have said has been my experience. Due to their experiences, they don't know how to treat a good man right... and when they find one, they instantly miss trust him... because how could this guy be for real, or how could they live up to him.
I have literally been told this by woman, that they honestly believe that I am the real deal... but they been hurt so bad that they don't want to date me.
Most Helpful Opinions
high quality wives yes. low quality wives try to baby trap their husband with a kid that may or may not be his
10 Reply
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
15Opinion
No.
First, the assumption that they are found by "good" men is a crack up. Who is to say that all those guys are good.
People, both men and women, who get married young are usually only motivated to have babies. But they don't have the life experience or wisdom to choose their partners carefully or to understand the hardship and responsibility that goes with raising a family. They are full of hormones and fairy tale fantasies. The fall in love over looks, lovey dovey romance and sex.
The problem with getting married young is, they miss out on a lot by locking themselves down with the responsibilities that come with it. That's one reason why a lot of people who get married at a young age wind up divorced.
Few guys are willing to take responsibility for divorce. They naturally blame women. Some blame all women or feminism or anything but themselves. And naturally, they are bitter because they have to share the assets that they and their wives accumulated while they were married with their exes. They blame women for being mercenary even though they, themselves are selfish. These are low quality guys. They never were high quality.
I'm not saying that men are the cause of all divorces. Far from it. But when I hear guys on GAG who constantly put women down, I know they are the kind that women should run from. They also tend to be the ones who brand non-virgins as sluts and used goods. And they think that women over 25 are over the hill. Those guys are immature, vane and shallow. They are low quality in everything that really matters.
I had girlfriends from the time I was 16. THOSE were "normal" girls with healthy values, hopes and dreams. Oh gasp, they weren't virgins!
I didn't even start thinking about finding a life partner and settling down until I was in my early 30s. Up to then I had been free to see and do at lot, have off fun, and I had a good job and assets. At that point, I was husband material.
I met the most amazing girlfriend I ever had when I was 36. She was 30. Her looks were my image of the feminine ideal. It turned out that she was hypersexual and orgasmic but had issues from being sexually abused for years by her step father from a very young age. Nevertheless, she was the first woman I ever loved with my heart and soul. She loved me, too. We lived together for over a year. We went on vacations and did lots of fun things together. But I realized that we couldn't make it as life-long partners because, even though she had a career, was hard working, super smart and determined to succeed, she had low self esteem and trust issues due to the abuse she had suffered.
We wound up separating for reasons that are too complicated to explain, but didn't have anything to do with cheating or anything mean. We were equally at fault.
Being away from her was the greatest pain I have ever experienced. It took me a year to pull myself together and pursue life once more.
At that point, I joined a pre-internet dating service. We went on dates with lots of beautiful women in their late 20s and early 30s but either they didn't click with me or I didn't click with them.
Then I met my future wife when I was 40. She is 2.5 years younger. We clicked immediately. Neither of us had ever been married. We had both lived full lives. We dated exclusively for 2 years before we were both sure that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together.
We've been happily married now for almost 26 years. We've built a great life and had lots of fun together.10 Reply
+1 yNope
Young people don't care to jump into marriages now a days they're not ready to do so either they're much too busy usually with school and getting settled things are delayed nowadays they're not like they used to be and you were growing up 30's is the new 20's what people were doing during your time in their twenties is what people are now getting to do in their 30s nowadays somewhere between 20 and 25 some of those young folks have the mindset of your generations 16 to 19.
Sure today's people grow up faster when it comes to sexuality but as far as maturity and the sense of responsibility having the financial means to be independent finish school those things have been drastically changed and delayed.
I suppose you can try to argue that people now a days pushing 40 and never married or not yet engaged may be seen as a questionable match...
But honestly I don't think so either Not entirely it depends...
however I would say that someone pushing 40 never married not engaged and still living at home with Mom and Dad never rented their own place or had a utility bill in their own name... NOW That's A MAJOR RED FLAG
11 Reply- +1 y
In other words people looking towards 20-year-olds as wife material are looking in the wrong direction
And I seriously question older folks looking towards younger girls of that age. I wouldn't trust their motives anyone looking for someone in that age it's just looking for someone gullible and easy to control or mode. An older person looking for some young flesh I would probably consider manipulator.
20 year olds are not ready for marriage yet they have much to live and much to learn it is better to have someone who's practicing had had her heart broken and has learned what she wants that's immature woman and that usually takes a couple years to several. A woman pushing 30 is far more better wife material than a child pushing 20.
Anonymous(45 Plus)+1 yFor the most part yes. I've said repeatedly that if a guy is not married by 25 he should take his time from then on. Because the top tier wife material women are gone at that point. Now that is not to so that the women left are trash (don't get me wrong, some are). But there's a reason the good women get snatched up quick. First off the guys generally know what they have. And the women who marry young typically want to be married. They make genuine effort to that end. This is the recipe for a healthy marriage. However the women who are left don't understand this yet. The woman who's left might just still be too selfish and need to learn it's called a "partnership" for a reason. Some will eventually make this realization and will eventually get snapped up as well. But I'm sorry to say there will always be a segment of women that will never make this jump. It will always be about her. And she'll never get why men don't just fall in line with that. She'll spend her twenties jumping from failed relationship after relationship. Her thirties she'll see the drop in guys interest. And by her 40's if she doesn't hate men altogether yet she'll resign herself to accepting 1 night stands just so she can hold a guys interest for a day. But it's cool because she's in control. Girl power!😆😆😆
20 Reply
+1 yIt's possible but society is also changing and what was valued by both men and women decades ago has changed. When I was in my 20s I thought I was "good wife" material, I was a virgin well into my 20. I wanted to find a man to marry, stay home and be a stay-at-home mom. I guess my problem is got with too many broken men who had been damaged by hook-up culture and causual FWBs relationships. The so-called "good men" didn't want to wait until marriage to have sex so at a certain point, I realized would have have to learn to provide for myself, husband or not.
16 Reply- +1 y
Ok, but let's recognize that women created both fuck buddy's and hookup culture. You may have been a virgin but did you have the other characteristics HQM seek?
- +1 y
Keep in mind that what women consider to be HQM are about 0.05% of the population.
- +1 y
Well, I'm pretty sure none of them would be considered top 0.05 percent of the population. What are the other characterisics though, beyond purity, and wanting to stay home to raise children. I was also a kind person and not superficial. I'm not "hot" though, maybe that's important, I'm more of "girl next door" type.
- +1 y
*Wouldn't be top 0.05*
- +1 y
No, the men have to be top 0.05%, not the women. A virtuous " next girl type" is ideal. Hot women have a greater likelihood of cheating (as per psychology today).
- +1 y
Okay, well what are the other qualities then that I was theoretically missing?
492 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic. This assumes that younger women are too stupid to realize the financial advantages of divorce, or not interested in a diverse sex life and thereby prone to cheating. I think both things are untrue and marring any woman, at least in the US, is an unacceptable risk.
13 Reply- +1 y
I agree, but posted the question to "stimulate thinking".
- +1 y
@KrakenAttackin good idea actually!
For the most part. But there could be exceptions to the rule such as a woman who chooses to live like a nun/single for a long period. or a woman who lives life poorly & then changes her mind and sincerely changes her ways. Yes, this is rare but I've seen cases.
00 ReplyNo. Aside from the obvious physical attraction men have for younger women I think they also gravitate towards us cause we’re easier to manipulate. The younger you are the more likely you are to have less experience with dating and relationships which also means a higher chance of willingness to put up with shitty behaviour cause you don’t know any better from having no frame of reference, that can go for man and women. If you have one partner and you end up dating a second later on you might say to yourself “wow that first person was a real piece of shit. I had no fucking idea there was better out there cause I haven’t experienced it before”. I think what makes a good women and “wife material” is someone who truly knows themselves, but not many young (and old) women do.
08 Reply- +1 y
Incorrect. Men value youth, beauty, femininity, fertility, and purity. Modern women 30+ have largely partied away the above characteristics.
- +1 y
How far has your mindset got you in the past 43 years? My guess would be you’re still unfulfilled in the love department and it will probably stay that way while you’re focused on outside parties and factors instead of looking inward. What I’ve witnessed is men that seek and idealize a very specific image in their head of what a good women is to them are rarely ever at the same level or capable of obtaining the type of women they desire. You attract what you are.
- +1 y
@smashleyy. Ha! The 19 year old female is telling me what men want! Classic. The attributes I described were basics that are beyond most modern women. I will amplify that men also want a modest women (in dress and demeanor). And a woman who is family centered. Makes a young feminist like you crazy, doesn't it?
- +1 y
It’s completely understandable for a man to want those things. Wanting a high value women when you aren’t so high value yourself is the issue. Sorry my opinion offended you, no need to get emotional buttercup. I also wouldn’t necessarily label myself a modern feminist but nice dig i guess?
- +1 y
You didn't read my post. I said high value women get snapped up by high value men. However, as women have an astronomically delusional definition of "high value man", most women miss their best opportunities and curb great guys. Part of being a high -value woman is having a basis in reality and realistic perception of what a relationship entails (i. e give/take, team work, mutual support and united front with outsiders). As these concepts are alien to most modern women, most men find most women to be "not of high quality". Let's use a Navy type acronyms (HQW's and NHQW's). HQW's readily find good men for long term relationships with an eye to marriage and family. NHQW's party away all that HQ MEN value about them. This is HQM tend to settle down with young HQW's. Capiche?
You are young enough to make good use of this information. You won't find your husband in a night club, on Tinder, or in a random toilet stall after smoking meth. - +1 y
We’re past the original topic at hand. I want to know why you a non-high value man feel so comfortable speaking on a subject you aren’t a part of. Like you said high value men and women get snatched up so what does that make you at your grown age? Oh right women are just too delusional to see what I great man they have in front of them? Or are you just not facing the truth of what/who you actually are?
I think I seen a comment from you awhile back talking about something along the lines of using women for sex whom you don’t respect as people, are those actions of a self respecting man? Mmm don’t think so. It’s sad you look down on women in the same category you fall into. Hope you find that genuine self acceptance buttercup. - +1 y
You seem offended by the basic premise of HQW's being identified by HQM, early in life. Why is that?
- +1 y
FYI, having a loud mouth, bad attitude, sense of entitlement, and another man's kids; are not traits of HQW.
- 632 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic.
+1 yNo. By such logic you claim you are 43 on this app and not married does that mean you aren't husband material?
Plenty of young women get married early only to be divorced by 30 for whatever reason.
Every person is a individual and is a case by case situation as to why they haven't been married.
20 Reply
+1 yI think they can be if they want to be, I just don't think most want to be. They don't get picked up, men tell them what they like, then they argue with men and say this isn't what you like. Ok, then, enjoy your cats.
00 Reply858 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic. i never thought of it in those term but I suppose it is true. I dated somebody for 4 years. We had talked about marriage. We really loved each other. She really was not wife material and I broke up with her when I finally figured it out
00 ReplyI would say that as time goes on yes, it's harder to find sane people with a good head on their shoulders.
10 ReplyEven young woman are not wife material. Have you seen the immaturity of these 2k babies oh hell no lol
10 Reply714 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic. No, I don't. Some lovely women (and men) get into bad relationships for various reasons, then get out of them.
00 Reply- 574 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic.
+1 yI’ve always believed that, so it definitely makes sense
10 Reply What about high-quality husbands? They don't seem to be around anymore.
00 ReplyI agree, women who ride the cock are def NOT wife material, but plenty of good women in 30s, many more slags though,,,
00 Reply
+1 ysome women mature slowly, it is suffering that makes maturity
00 Reply
+1 yKinda agree with what your saying
00 Reply
+1 yLOL. No.
11 Reply- +1 y
Says the unmarried 30 year old.
- 592 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic.
+1 y90%, yes.
00 Reply
Anonymous(18-24)+1 yNope
00 Reply
Do you agree with the saying "Happy wife, happy life"?
Learn more
We're glad to see you liked this post.
You can also add your opinion below!
Girl's Behavior
Guy's Behavior
Flirting
Dating
Relationships
Fashion & Beauty
Health & Fitness
Marriage & Weddings
Shopping & Gifts
Technology & Internet
Break Up & Divorce
Education & Career
Entertainment & Arts
Family & Friends
Food & Beverage
Hobbies & Leisure
Other
Religion & Spirituality
Society & Politics
Sports
Travel
Trending & News
Most Helpful Opinions