I have always been curious about how to do marriage in order to keep a fresh feeling all the time?

[Fiona77]

[RavVid]

Good question. I have noticed a lot of couples develop short cuts to fights. Which means there are unresolved issues. We all have an image of a good spouse but your spouse may have a different image of what being a good spouse is and the two don't necessarily 100% correspond. Maybe "what would you have liked me to have done differently" is a good question when there is conflict.

One girlfriend would cook which I appreciated and enjoyed. But in my view she spoiled it by just saying fix yourself as she served herself. If I was cooking I would serve her portion first. A small thing but it niggled. It was a bit outside my conception of a good partner.

I have noticed the happiest couples I know are appreciative and formally polite with each other. Like 'Could you pass the salt please' instead of 'Salt'. They are also proud of each other and never make tik toks ridiculing their partner.

One thing every couple deals with is sex. The deadly enemy is every day life. Every body settles into a routine. With that husbands and wives become boring. It is a good thing in one way - soft easy comfortable sex with orgasms all around but the rampant exciting sex goes with familiarity.

Not sure anyone has solved this. You could install a chandelier in the bedroom but that has limited utility. I think one thing that helps is your partner having a licence for sex and avoiding stress - if one or both you is stressed it tends to kill things off.

I think you can forget to enjoy each others company. Good to have a Friday night ritual.

[OlderAndWiser]

I think you should approach marriage as if it is NOT the final destination for a relationship and certainly not as if it is self-sustaining. It is like a garden that can be very productive but needs constant attention.

[Fiona77]

Yes, thanks for your answer, it gives me better idea to maintain future marriage life,

[OlderAndWiser]

You are quite welcome. I have always liked the garden analogy for marriage.

[dolemite58]

i think each person needs to make having their own personal time to themselves a priority so you don’t get sick of each other too quick, it’s like that saying that familiarity breeds contempt

[Fiona77]

Yes, I agree with your words very much, I have always yearned for married life, but I heard that married life is difficult to keep fresh!

[MementoMori777]

wdym?