Is it ok to buy myself gifts instead of relying on a man to do it?

[Anonymous]

I put a beautiful diamond ring on afterpay because I wanted it and I think that if there’s something I want, I should save up for it and buy it myself, instead of expecting a man to do it. Next, there’s some cashmere cardigans I want.. so I was thinking I save up and buy them myself in 6 months.

[WaterIsland]

Of course. But I’m gonna take a slightly different angle. Buy now pay later companies (like Afterpay) make money by convincing stores that people spend more when they don’t have to pay the full amount right away. Which research has shown happens. It’s a very sneaky way for them to make more money off of you.


If you saved up, and bought it, why not just buy it and pay for it?


There is this feeling when we buy something or hand over cash to someone like a feeling of loss. Which is our way of protecting our money. It’s painful to hand someone cash. Less so with credit cards and debit cards because you don’t see the money leaving your hand. However, with buy now pay later, you don’t have any of that. The money is still in your account, and you got something. It’s completely against standard logic. And that can lead to very dangerous financial situations.


Good for you for saving up your money, prioritizing what you want, and making those decisions. I’d just recommend thinking twice about buy now pay later.


And of course you should not rely on a man to buy you gifts. You shouldn’t rely on anyone to do anything for you. It’s so much better in a relationship to be self sufficient, and use the relationship to add to your life instead of it being your life.

[Guy13]

Yes and it is wise as you are not beholding to him then.

[Bethany22]

Yes, I think everyone in the situation will be happier with that arrangement. Why would you expect men to buy you sweaters? On what occasion?

[FilmGuy93]

Sure... it's your money, spend it how you want.

[Anonymous]

Of course, if you want something then you should be the one to buy it. Why would you expect a man to buy it for you?

[Anonymous]

Yeah as a man who has chose being single Ill buy my stuff be it cigars, scotch or more gold jewellery

[Stevefiveo]

Of course. It's your money.

[In_Trance]

sure

[clampfan101]

It’s your money.