After talks on here and discussions in class and with friends, I figured I ought to ask this question.
I usually thought chivalry was something nice, but not required. Something like "Oh, you're going to pay for MY meal? What a nice thing to do!"
But the impression I'm getting is "Okay, so you bought my meal. Nothing special since that's what guys are SUPPOSED to do..".
In fact, with my first girlfriend on our first date, I said "If you want I'll take care of the tab." Her response: "Uhh...Yeah." I can't describe how put-off I was that she EXPECTED a free meal.
I do nice things for people because I like making people happy. If it doesn't make them happy, then I really have no reason to do it, now, do I? And I think this is why chivalry is dying.
So chivalry, gifts, paying for dates: is it something you expect, or is it something you appreciate?
Most Helpful Girl
It's not something I expect or take advantage of, but yes - I definitely appreciate it.1