Hell Yes
Nah its 2022
see poll ( come open my car door coach )
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Please select your age
It's called having good manners, being polite and respectful, and shouldn't be delegated to just the male gender. I have men gold open the door for me all the time, but I also do the same for anyone entering a place when I am, cuz I was raised to have manners. And I don't act offended when a man holds open the door for me, not do I act entitled to it. I just think they're someone with manners and I thank them or return the favor if we going through more than one set of doors...
Funny the timing of this question, the other day at gas station, two guys held a door open for me and the one joked to the other that I got the double door treatment (OMG that kinda sounds like a bad porn title🤣)
I mean I think everyone likes a chivalrous person, and everyone should.
The issue is in whether or not it's fair to expect or demand such behavior. It should be an added nicety. Especially because different people have different ways of expressing this. In my case, I'm not fond of all the ritual. It feels like putting up a wall.
Also, always go on a date assuming you are paying for yourself. Like an adult. Don't assume you are owed money for your presence. The only reason this exists is because women couldn't make their own money. In the same way you wouldn't expect a child to pay for their own meal. Some call it payment for the extra effort she took for her makeup and expensive outfit. Well don't expect her to wear expensive makeup or an expensive outfit.
Just as bad as assuming, I think it's something else when people are actively insulted by chivalrous gestures. I don't even know what to make of that.
Yes but not all respect then imho. Good quality women will love a chivalrous man. If you're nice to a girl and the first thing she does is treats you like a doormat just get up and walk away plenty of good girls out there that still want a guy to cherish her and in turn cherish him. Just know who you a w being chivalrous for. Open up with basic common courtesy and decency, gauge her, then determine if she's the type of woman to be chivalrous towards. Chivalry is a high level of respect from a guy. He's showing a girl humility, he's willing to protect her, he's willing to go the extra mile to make her happy sometimes. That kind of respect should be earned, not just thrown out there for anyone. But for a good girl, yes it's worth it and even rewarding.
There was a dating coach on YouTube who said a guy might give you rides and pay for your dinner and pull out the seat for you at restaurants but then hit or abuse you after you fall in love with him, so I won’t like a guy just because he is chivalrous, I need to learn that he can be trusted.
I agree trust should be number one. As for the abuse and chivalry connection I think that is bogus. That is just a guy being nice in order to suck you in for the abuse. I wouldn't call that Chivalry because if there is abuse afterwards then it's just a guy being diabolical not chivarlous.
Opinion
44Opinion
I'm a respectful woman and want a man to see me as his other half. Not the weaker, just the other half. The half that wants to be looked after and look after him.
Acts of chivalry isn't offensive, sexist or demeaning they signs of generosity respect, gentleness kindness and love.
Chivalry, a code of conduct on the battlefield and in the presence of the Lord or King, could be the designated entitled path of kindness or ruthlessness depending on the situation. I was taught to be a gentleman, which is probably more in line with what you are asking about than the ways of the warrior, like Chivalry or Bushido.
I think a lady deserves the kindness of a gentleman.
Yes but at the same time, if he isn't... its not the end of the world. I can open my own doors but if he wants to, I'll even remember to say "Thank you" as so many people forget that part.
Most my family, my father and brothers are all this way. My boyfriend is into it so much that he has to clear the snow and ice off the side of his truck so I can get in without slipping.
@Priv9696 It depends, I've done dates where I just meet someone somewhere for the first date, and we both pay for ourselves. I've also done them where he picks me up and pays, cause he asked me out or I drive and pick him up cause I asked him out.
First dates are always the harder ones to know, after a few it gets easier to figure out.
If I do not like him that way, then I'm okay hanging out as friends and always paying for myself.
it just varies to the situation.
Absolutely, and I do consider myself so extremely lucky and fortunate with my husband being one of the very few.
By réflex I usually treat women chivalrously given my upbringing. It doesn’t cost anything to open doors or pull out chairs.
However when it comes to money that’s a different issue. I found that when I consistently pick up tabs many women see that as a sign of weakness and they shamelessly exploit. This is why that on first date I never buy full dinners. I might buy coffee or drinks. But there are so many POS “meal ticket” women out there it’s insane. No excuse for it in 2022 either but sadly many of them still exist.
If she really likes me she won’t care how fancy the first date is. I only do expensive dinners for women who truly appreciate me.
No. Women will tell you they do but in reality most women will just ridicule a chivalrous act.
In reality women want what they want ONLY when THEY want it. Don't waste your time guys. I'm not saying don't do it. But do it only because you're a MAN and you feel it says something about your character. F*** what she thinks.
@yyyuuuiii thanks man!
Hell yes. Treat me like a lady and I'll treat ya like a gentleman. We bring this out in each other. Mutual respect and consideration.
Absolutely, 100% yes. I love that my current SO is a true gentleman. It makes me feel that extra special.
Hi, would you cnsider an older man like me?
@curry_uncle
That is very sweet of you, but I am happily in a relationship with a wonderful man. I will take the compliment that you asked! ❤️
Would you leave him for my chivalry?
@curry_uncle
Likely no as he is quite the gentleman himself. Sorry.
@curry_uncle hmmm getting a bit weird there aren't you?
@PrettyPriya Every girl likes a man who opens the door for her and spanks her ass hard when she passes by! It it not true?
@John_Michaels_2020
Not this girl. So, I will have to say false.
It's more about acting like a civilized human being than an ape.
If she's not civil then she's no lady
You mean nice men? Yes. I also dont believe that men in the past were so gentleman/chivalrous. It is a hollywood myth. Even in james bond movies the "hero" raped/harrassed the villains/antiheros or female characters. Sexual harrassment in the work place was normal in 60s, rape in marriage was legal etc. So modern men are actually chivalrous to me.
You don't understand what chivalry is. It cannot exist in am equal society it is inherently unequal.
I do understand to an extent and i dont believe that majority of men were chivalrous in the past. I did not see any old man who were chivalrous to his wife for example. It is just a myth that is created by hollywood in my opinion
That is why i believe that modern men are thousand times better and more chivalrous than men in the past
Am i chivalrous when i open a door for a man which i often do for everyone? Chivalrous is just another word for being nice. And you should be nice to your partner. Doing some romantic lovely gestures or being chivalrous such as opening the door etc is normal to me. Everyone do unnecasary but clingy/chivalrous things like opening the door for your partner.
It all boils down to personal attractiveness. Some women love receiving flowers from Chads or having the door opened by them, but try to do that to a woman being a sub five to see what happens. I've seen this happening many times happening to me and other friends.
I've experienced this as well. Only from the "Chad" perspective. You know how many times a girl complains about certain behaviors from men, yet I happen to show these behaviors as well. And when I ask them to show me how they look like, they are always unattractive. And when I call them out on it by saying that I did these things as well, but for some reason I'm allowed to, they giggle and say "Yeah, but you're different".
@TruthBringer Yeah dude I've experience the same thing. When it comes to chivalries, jokes and even harassments women can be very hypocrites. The same law applied to "betas" genetics wise do not apply to alphas looks wise. That's why I say men should be careful whenever receiving advices from women, they usually say that being yourself and nice is enough, but when they say that, they're most likely thinking about a dude handsome like Harry Cavil.
Oh I stopped taking women's advice a LONG TIME ago. You should ask the fisherman on how to catch fish, not the fish itself. Often they themselves don't even know what they want. They say they want A, but they often go for B. My knowledge about female nature comes from both experience and other MEN. The last thing I would do is listen to a woman when it comes to this topic. Their values and truths change with their feelings. And we all know their feelings change like the seasons.
Sadly, we are living in a time that chivalry is seen as weakness by women. There is a reason why they get with men who are the complete opposite of being chivalrous. The only time they tolerate it is when they are with a guy they are already very much into. But then again, if he doesn't have any of the 'bad boy' traits, it is often a dead end for him.
the discrepancy between what women want and what men think women want is kind of sad honestly
Why do you think that is?
@Jamie05rhs well from personal experience, I have found that some men tend to think they know more about what I want then I do myself. I am sure there are more reasons and that it's a lot more complex than that, but that is what I have seen.
@Subarugirl What is it that you want?
Well chivalry is defined as courteous behavior, so yes, I would not only want that, I would expect that from any romantic partner.
Oh okay!
@Subarugirl Maybe they act that way with you because you're just immature
@OneManOnly01 well that's calling the kettle black, don't you think.. shouldn't you be in school right now? Maybe brushing up on your sex ed?
@Subarugirl I'm really exhausted of this. Why don't you ever talk to me without taking jabs every time?
@Subarugirl Also, were you still in school when you were 18? I think you took a very long time to finish school
@coachTanthony Fuuuck that! I ain't ordering anyone else's meal. I don't date children.
Actually, as a matter of fact, if I was with a kid (whether my own or a nephew or niece), I would let them order their own food, too!
@Jamie05rhs lot of women don't like this
@Jamie05rhs He's talking about asking them what they want to eat and then ordering that food for them
@OneManOnly01 Yes exactly. It’s sophisticated especially at a five star restaurant. But I digress lol
@Subarugirl there is also a discrepancy between what women “say” they want vs. what they really want.
"well from personal experience, I have found that some men tend to think they know more about what I want then I do myself"
- Maybe because they observe your actions and take that seriously rather than your words. And this may not specifically apply to you, but I hear often women complain that men tend to know what they want better than them. Which in the case of men who actually induldged in learning female nature and manage to be successful with wooing them is indeed true. Women don't always know what they want. They think they do by saying they want A, but often go for B. Actions speak louder than words. Again, this may not apply to you, but may very well be the case. Just because you don't like the idea of someone knowing what you want better than you yourself, doesn't mean they aren't wrong when that person actually observed your actions and see a contradiction with your words.
@coachTanthony 5-star restaurants perpetuate the old order of aristocracy and patriarchy.
@Jamie05rhs You can eat on the side of the road, nobody said you can't. Just try not to get run over by a vehicle
@OneManOnly01 I know. I don't do that shit. She should have her own voice, and not have to have her wishes and desires filtered through me. A woman is a human being equal to a man. You know they can own their own bank accounts these days? They can even vote! 😱. (sarcasm)
@OneManOnly01 Ha Ha. Very funny.
@Jamie05rhs And they can eat the food they want, why does it matter if they order it or the man does as long as she's eating what she wants to eat?
@OnlyManOnly01 I have absolutely nothing against people with disabilities. But I don't date mute women.
@Jamie05rhs So since you want her to do everything by herself, DON'T EVER do anything for a woman! If she's getting crushed by a wrecked car don't save her let her do it herself okay?
@OneManOnly01 If she NEEDS help, I will gladly help her.
@Jamie05rhs You're a stupid clown, what's your preferred pronoun?
@Subarugirl Just curious, what do you think of genderfluids?
@OneManOnly01 that topic is not relevant and I'm over the bigotry towards the LGBTQ community.
@Jamie05rhs LOL it's called being classy.
@coachTanthony I AM classy! But I'm also a feminist. That "traditional" stuff doesn't fly with me. I find it repulsive.
@Jamie05rhs It's biological. Men are born to lead, protect and provide. Women are attracted to these qualities whether they like it or not. Sorry.
@coachTanthony Well said, but both feminists & male feminists will never grasp that reality. Denial is a classic defence mechanism for those who don't possess these qualities.
@Jamie05rhs You're a feminist? Are you also a masochist? And are you a man?
@coachTanthony I'm not attracted to those types of women. Sorry.
@OneManOnly01 Yes, I am a man. Yes, I am a feminist. No, I am not a masochist. Nor am I a sadist.
Yup, but I like being chivalrous to men too. I find it amusing when I hold a door open for a guy and get interesting reactions:
1. The ones who are just genuinely flattered and would thank me
2. The ones who feel their masculinity is in jeopardy and must touch the door to feel like they opened it (even though it was already wide open) with no thanks to me
3. I just get ignored.
Never mind equality, women like to be treated politely. The door being opened for them, or having their chair pulled out so that they can sit down, has not gone out of style.
Today at the Dollar Tree, I opened and held the door for two women, both of whom thanked me.
Being a gentleman will never go out of style.
They love it, and that's precisely why I can't be chivalrous to everyone. It's the only card I have. Nobody want my ugly ass, and I don't have any meaningful talents or skills ☠ If every man started being chivalrous to every woman, it's over for me. I'm committing seppuku.
Girls will claim they like it, but men who have acted this way will tell you from bitter experience, no. No they don't. They revel in taking the opportunity to bust your balls over it.
So fuck 'em twice. First for lying about it, and second for bitching about common decency and politeness. Feminism truly makes the world a lesser place.
In my opinion. You do not start our with girlfriend or wifey privileges.
You start out at the dollar menu and earn better from me. Earn my investment.
If I am chivalrous it's not me saying I think she's better than me and I need to impress her.
It's me showing a public display of her value to me.
That she is irreplaceable to me.
That is how I interpret chivalry.
To do it to place her on a pedestal is to be a simp.
I really enjoy being treated like a lady/old fashioned😊
I do! But I don’t expect the guy to pay for every date we go on.
Good because you shouldn't!