Over the past few months I came to realize that I wasted my time. Lots of stuff has been going on, lots of things have changed and I failed to keep up with my life. I got lucky, I was born with lots of choices and options, but I never used any of them. I spent my time on my computer watching videos or playing games, even working on concepts for edits for hours, while I could have done so many things such as learning for school, teaching myself useful skills or even just working out. I could have learned to play the piano for so long, I could have kept doing Wing Chun, but instead I wasted all of it. I could have spent a year in a different country, learned another language or at least done the things that I had to do but never did. I realized all of this a while ago, but I never got myself up to changing anything, instead I got depressed and crawled into a little cave.
This summer we were on holidays in Agia Galini, Crete. One week of laying in the sun and doing nothing, so I had a lot of time to think. I realized that I needed to change something, I want to go to the university and study psychology or philosophy but for that I need better grades, which is why I need to put more effort into school. I want to learn the piano because I always had a feeling for music, for that I only need a cable to get my keyboard going again. I want to get good at video editing, for that I only need to work harder and stop wasting time watching videos. Everything I want is so easy to reach, I just need to do all those things and get my shit together. It's that easy, that near, and yet it's so hard to make the first step and even harder to keep up the effort.
Now I only need a huge motivation and a reminder that keeps me on the right track, a goal or a person.
I was at a beach bar drinking my fresh orange juice and I saw a beautiful girl (I know, it sounds like the start of a bad movie). She was the daughter of the bar owner, as it later turned out she was only 12 years old, about two and a half years younger than me. She was working hard, even though they have holidays there and she kept going, didn't cry around and helped. She probably never had all of the choices and options that I had and I have everything I need to my avail and I don't use it. I can change my life and the lives of others in every single second, but I don't.
I am writing this in the plane back to Germany. When I arrive at home I will think of her and NOT just go to my computer, watch videos or waste my time in other ways. I will order the cable for my keyboard so I can hopefully make others happy with my music. When school starts I will do my homework, keep my stuff in order and spend more time learning and practicing. In my free time I will NOT watch videos or play games non stop, I will improve my editing skills, work out, think more and become more aware of myself. She will remind me of my goals so that I may become more productive and a better person.
Thank you for reading, I hope I was able to motivate some of you to change something about your lives. Also thank you to the girl at the beach bar.
Sorry for my English.