Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Every year in the US, on the fateful night of October 31, also known as Halloween, hordes of women grace the streets, clubs, bars, and parties dressed as "sexy" (insert costume name). But I have to say that sexy (insert costume) should have limits to what can or should actually be made into something sexy because some things just shouldn't or are just stupid and/or unappealing in any sort of sexy way.

1. Sexy Poop

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Yes, poop. It's bad enough we have to see this emoji being overused by everyone everywhere, but to imply that poop can be sexy...sorry, it's not that kind of website!. Poop is literally human or animal waste that the body is getting rid of and that we dispose of because of. There is nothing sexy about it.

2. Sexy Graduate

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Isn't the goal of getting a higher education to, how shall I say this delicately, um...get away from situations and establishments where outfits such as these would perhaps be a requirement of your employment?

3. ...?

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

I'll give you a few seconds to guess what this woman is supposed to be. Take it all in for a moment, hmm, what is she? If you guessed a body bag, you are either one of the 3 people who bought and wore this costume, or, there is no other or. I would love to read your dissertation about how a body bag is a sexy thing, or the dead body in it...on second thought, you know, never mind, if you'd write such a paper, there is already probably something plenty wrong with you.

4. Sexy Oscar the Grouch

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

There was, nor has their ever been anything sexy about this canned monster who lived in the trash or while we're here, because they exist, the other sets of Sesame Street characters. Why are there so many people in such a rush to pervert all manner of childhood cartoons and movies? These characters are not only beloved for their innocence, and the lessons they taught us as young children, but they are meant FOR young children. To sexify it is just cringe.

5. Sexy Ebola Nurse

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Like really? This is a real thing? I was going to google and put up an image of what those ravaged by Ebola look like, but I'll spare you. Trust me tho, if this is what you think you should wear to fight Ebola, you're going to get it and die because you're apparently stupid.

6. Sexy Skunk

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Who's fantasy was...is...this? What is sexy about an animal who's funk you have to bathe off in tub full of tomatoes?

7. Sexy Nun

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

I'm not even a religious person, but I can respect that you believe in what you believe in as long as the feeling is mutual and you're not hurting others or yourself being a part of it, but this type stuff...taking someone's religion and perverting it into a sexy caricature...makes even me uncomfortable because I do view it as being disrespectful of someone's religion in the worst way.

8. Sexy Oompah Loompah

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Didn't these guys basically murder young children who "got in the way" of their candy making? Anyway, no human looks good with orange skin, white lips, and green hair, not even our president. Not sexy.

9. Mushrooms (Super Mario Brothers)

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

But why tho? The video game world is literally filled with hyper-sexualized women at every turn, so making an innocent life giving mushroom "sexy," just seems like ridiculous overkill.

10. Honorable mention goes to the Sexy Avengers

Stupid Sexy Halloween Costumes

Yes, because it looks dumb on men too...


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What Guys Said 36

  • I recommend inflatable costumes. This is mine:
    www.auraglow.co.uk/.../2250.jpg

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  • There's always Taarna, or the Mail Order bride.

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  • They wouldn't keep making them if people weren't buying them though.

    One year an ex girlfriend of mine went as a "slutty bumblebee." Definitely strange but also funny in a way

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  • When I was in college, at one Halloween party a couple came wearing only body paint. It was a coolish night, so it wasn't very flattering for the guy.

    There were also a couple girls wearing clear plastic bags. Only.

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  • Those are pretty weird; except the sexy graduate. Don't see anything stupid about that. What are your thoughts on sexy teacher, doctor, and police woman?

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    • This is probably way too deep for Halloween of all things, but from a psychological point of view, people fantasize about those three things often times because they are omnipresent in ones life and they are figures of authority and power that have some form of control on our lives. How many people, for example, had crushes on a teacher they once had (some even acting on it). To see a sexy version of these things is titillating to some people. It allows the brain to "go there" where it may already be going thinking of people in these real life jobs anyway. Now contrast that with a children's character who lives in a garbage can... poop... skunks... people in body bags, etc

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What Girls Said 27

  • You can make the Poop one funny if you have someone stick a piece of paper to your back saying "Hot shit".

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  • Hate me all you want but Im doing the sexy nun one this year with red eyes and probably a bit of blood by corner of the mouth I don't know. Reason being cause I keep seeing them in so many horror movies.

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  • i wondered the same thing especially when it's a scary costume and they label it sexy like then it isn't sexy anymore? i think it's just for the attention maybe for eyes to be on them but then maybe they just want to have fun but it isn't sexy nor scary at all just draws more attention on them

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  • The sexy Ebola nurse is ridiculous, but could be funny in an ironic sort of way. If one of my friends wore it, it would be hilarious. If a different friend of mine wore it, it’s just plain wrong. Sorry, sweetie, I love you but you’re just a little too dumb to understand and wear anything ironically.

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  • u forgot "sexy fidget spinner"

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