My boyfriend wants to get me pregnant? too early to have a baby?

[ldrccarter]

Im 19, he's 21. What he wants in the whole world is to have a family. He wants to get me pregnant. I keep saying no im not ready. I want to dinish school, have a career, move out, and other girls i know who have kids at 19 start life wayyyy too soon. Im not ready. I know im not. He says *ur never ready until after you have one* well im not ready to give up my young life. we want to move intogether and everytime he sees a baby, or a family, in person or on tv, he says *pleaseeeee let me get you pregnant* *pleaseeeeeeeeeeee* and begs and begS. I want a kid, but a kid will ruin my life now. and if i have a kid with him, which i want, i would want to date for a couple of yeara and live together for a while and get married. THENN have a kid. Because what if we have a kid, and realize we arnt workig out? Ill be stuck as a single mother. dont want that.

So does anyone agree with me? Too early to get pregnant?

[Anonymous]

whatistheexcel.com/.../...%20paul_heyman%20wwe.gif

I am proud of you! I am dead serious. I am 24... and all I see these days are single moms 18-25!!! It trips me out. I know some 25 year olds with kids who are already 5-7 years old! Why the fuck would anyone want to have a kid that early? Just so they can potentially be 40 year old grandparents?

The best time to have kid, which I have been saying for years (but single moms always yell at me), is to wait until your in you're in a LONG relationship, have a stable job, financial stability, a college education at the very least and you have talked it over with your significant other.

These days, I see so many single mothers... and I don't want to date a single mom. A man shouldn't have to raise another man's kid. That's just my opinion.

I think you should wait, just like you said. Get that education, get that job, become financially strapped, make sure you are in a great relationship and then have kid. Don't be like these other 18-25 year olds who decide to have a kid early. It's poor planning, and how can you provide for your kid if you're a single parent, working 2-3 jobs, etc?

[Opinion Owner]

Rambling on here... I apologize. It's just refreshing to see a woman who doesn't want to be a single mom :). Anyway... if your boyfriend keeps pressuring you, leave his ass! I am not trying to be mister downer here... but young love doesn't always last forever. I know a lot of people who thought they were in love, had a kid and then broke up. So... hold onto your principles and become successful first.

[ldrccarter]

Thank you a lot :)

[ldrccarter]

And babies are cute at first. I tell him seeing other peoples babies and babysitting is fun, because eventually the kid leaves. Having my own kid... its hard

[ButtHoleSandwich]

I'm a single mom and I have friends who are also single parents. Both are getting their master's degree and had kids at 15 and 17. I had a baby at 23. I work 1 job and do well for myself (own my home, car). It's not a life sentence. I mean if you had a child you wouldn't want a woman not to date you because you had a child. It takes a real man and woman to raise a child that isn't biologically theirs.. not many can handle that. I do recommend waiting but do it when you are ready. Even if it's before 24. Best of luck!

[ldrccarter]

Awww thanks :) i dated a 25 year old who had an 18 month daughter. I never met her, but i was willing to love her as my child

[ldrccarter]

@buttholesandwich
wow you and your fruends seeM to be doing good. I also would want to be a si gle mother, nto look into my childs face to see my ex every time i look at them. It would be kimda deoressing. Thats also why i want a promising relationshi

[ldrccarter]

I also woulnt*
not would

[ButtHoleSandwich]

Yes one is a nurse and the other a speech pathologist. Finishing up my biology degree then off to medical school. Baby in tow haha

[Opinion Owner]

My mom has her first kid at age 15 with her first boyfriend. Then she had a kid at 17 with her 2nd boyfriend. 2 kids with 2 different men. My mom, through the support system of her family, did a little bit of college (but didn't graduate). She worked 2 jobs, put my half brother and half sister through school and had her own apartment. 10 years later, she met my dad. At age 33, after getting married, my dad had me and years later my younger brother.

My dad never got along with my half brother and half sister. My half sister resented my dad for it and hates him. My half brother (who is now almost 40) started to get along well with my dad after he moved out and lived on his own. My half brother and half sister also hate their real dads because they were never around.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

I'm sorry you had a bad experience. My daughter's father was previously engaged and his ex had 3 children by 2 different men. He became dad to all of them and even his ex girlfriend. He is a dad to our child. My grandma was married to my grandpa for 74 years. They had 14 kids together and although married she was a "single" parent

[fenixx0083]

Waaaaaay too early. Tell him to relaxed and get a job and a house first

[SoldiersWoman]

If he doesn't put a ring on your hand first you can tell him where to put his baby maker. That's my opinion. He has no say in getting you pregnant until you're married and even then he can't FORCE you if you aren't ready! I totally agree with you! If my boyfriend did that I would give him a piece of my mind! I'm 21 he's 23 and we both have jobs and an apartment together! If he can't accept that you aren't ready and all he can think about is a kid then he needs to step back and think about the possible mother of that child and what that means to her (you).

[ldrccarter]

Hey we are lookig for a place. Where do u live? Like country and if ur in america, what state?

[SoldiersWoman]

Alberta Canada

[ldrccarter]

Oh. Nevermind

[NewNaughtiness]

Too early for you, you're not ready personally regardless of anything less and that's what is important! You need to be in a place where your financially and mentally capable of having a child! Don't have one just because he wants one and resent it for being the reason you missed out on all the dreams you have, put yourself first!

[RationalLioness]

"*ur never ready until after you have one*"

Bullshit. Some people are NEVER ready to take care of a child. It is purely selfish to bring in a child when they will not be well taken care of.

I agree with you. Much too early to get pregnant. You have a great head on your shoulders.

[ButtHoleSandwich]

Don't do it!!! I wasn't ready and never wanted kids. I said that in August 2013 and the next month I got pregnant. I recommend doing everything you desire BEFORE having kids. Trust me I wish I did. I love my daughter and wouldn't change it but life is definitely different.. I wouldn't say difficult just different lol

[lumos]

Duh, it's too early to get pregnant. And the fact that he's literally BEGGING you even though you've said no also shows how immature he is. He needs to learn that no means no, that it's your body and that pressuring you to get pregnant is stupid as fuck. Honestly I would break up with him if he continues, what a selfish and inconsiderate prick.

[ldrccarter]

Yeah and two times i paid for dinner and drinks, he forced on my stuffed crust peparonni pizza. I dont eat peparonni and stuffed crust was nasty. Then i told him to get me something sweet (beer) he got his favorite beer which i dont like. With my money. I didn't eat anything. 1 i could of at least gotten cheese pizza with stuffed crust. So i can just eat the pizza. Or i could of gotten peraronni with regular crust. So i would at least have SOMETHING to eat. Then he baugt a 6 pack of his nasty beer with my money! After i told him what i wanted! didn't get me a single can. He got himself a fucking six pack when he coukd of gotten 3 cans of my drink and 3 cans of his. I was so upset. I still am. didn't confront him. He nas no job

[Lyndsielee666]

i think when the times right its right, and obviously right now isn't right for you. Are you on birth control or anything? a baby will change your relationship whether you've dated and lived together or not. i had my daughter early and i'm so glad i did because she saved me from my self destructive life. every one is different.

[linkywinky]

Definitely too early if you're not ready. Wanting kids and being ready for kids are two totally different things. If he can't respect that, then maybe you already know your answer to whether or not you guys are going to work out.

[jessiie06]

Yes it's wayyy too early. a lot of people want kids because they are cute & don't realize how hard it is to raise a child & to wake up every 2 hours with them. You should wait

[Hannah591]

It is too early to get pregnant and you have to wonder why he's being so hasty with it. I see this as more of a red flag if anything. Please do not get pregnant with this guy.

[ldrccarter]

i think its because he got a girl pregnant but she had a miscarriage and he us still traumatized about it

[Hannah591]

I think he's trying to trap you tbh.

[ldrccarter]

Maybe. Ill see

[idkwtftoputhere]

Yeah dude that's too early, your boyfriend sounds nuts.

[lime_rampljuset]

You don't want to get pregnant. Stick to that idea! Don't let his desires to ruin your life.

[Anonymous]

tell him to marry you before, 19 it's not too early if he had a stable job

[CourtJester]

Definitely dinish school first.

[doodlecake]

Wait till your married.

[Anonymous]

Way too early. Good on you for holding off.

[zombiebabe]

kinda too early..

[emerald77]

WAY too early!!