Is my mom trashy?

[Anonymous]

I’m just kinda curious because she wears denim shorts and sports bra during the summer and it seems like a bit too revealing and she is 36 and really fit.

[nightdrot]

It sounds less a question of being trashy than of having a questionable fashion sense. Even then, context matters.

If your mother is dressed that way in church, that is one thing. If she is dressed that way in the backyard or at the beach or, in certain contexts, even on the street, that is quite another.

Think of it. If you are in your underwear around the house, that hardly suggests a lack of character. You are home and comfortable and it pretty much begins and ends there. Ditto if you are running or walking shirtless on the street.

Move that into a department store, you have a different problem.

Suffice to say it is arguable that there are better ways to dress that may be more attractive. Certainly people will draw what conclusions they will.

Still, such conclusions, absent other more incriminating information, are scarcely little more than stereotypes. Such stereotypes may even have some merit at a general level, but not necessarily in any specific case.

So cut mom some slack. To be sure, she could be a better dresser, but unless you have reason to believe that she is having random sex with any guy she meets she is probably not "trashy" as that term is typically understood.

[Asker]

We don’t go to church but she wears that when we are at the store to buy food or on a jog. She wears a bikini at the beach.

[nightdrot]

Well, again, without knowing your mother there is no real way to tell. You are making a supposition based on what she wears - and while she is certainly relaxed, her fashion sense could be described as much casual.

You know your mom better than anyone. If her greatest sin is that she underdresses, that could be as much about her sense of comfort as it is an effort to attract attention to herself.

You might, very gently, say something to her. Be polite and understanding - and not accusatory - but express your concern that she is giving other people a wrong impression that she may not be aware of.

In any case, she may not care. Fashion standards are declining. When I was growing up, my mother would not go downtown to shop without wearing a hat and gloves. Now that would be more appropriate only at a formal dinner.

Once upon a time, my dad would not go out - unless it was Saturday - without a tie on. Now I go to the store in the summer in a tank-top t-shirt. Usually that I throw on just before I go into the store, otherwise I might be shirtless. (By the way, dressing as she does to jog is not a big deal. Do you ever run shirtless?)

So don't jump to any conclusions. Judge your mother on the totality of the person - and if you can do so politely - express your concerns. Telling her that you are raising the issue because you love her and don't want people to think badly of her.

That is about all you can do.

[Asker]

Yeah I don’t think it’s a problem I’m just concerned if others think that. I do walk around shirtless and go to the store shirtless during the simmer so yeah it’s not like I’m any better.

[nightdrot]

Well, as I say - and even I don't go INTO the store shirtless - express your concerns to your mom if you can politely and calmly. Say that you love her and that you don't want anyone thinking poorly of her.

As likely as not she will say that she is not worried about what other people - and UP TO A POINT, that is a good thing. Overall, though - and this is just a guess on my part - any mom that raised a son who is that concerned about her as you seem to be is herself likely to be a good person.

[ivbnlknfru]

It all depends when and where she is doing this... for the most part she is proud of how she looks and wants to show it off, but if she is doing it to attract other men... not so good if she is still married

[Asker]

She is married but I don't know if it’s attract men

[ivbnlknfru]

Well like I said where is she when she is dressed that way? How does her husband or your father feel about this?

[Asker]

Just chilling out on the streets and jogging and stuff. I don't know how my stepdad feels about it.

[ivbnlknfru]

It seems you have more of a problem about it then your step dad. I understand that nobody wants to see there mom as a sex object, being your mom is remarried she probably want to show off her sexuality that she has a new man that sees her that way. If she is not dressing that way for social events or going to public stores or any other place that would perceive her as being trashy. I think she feels confident and comfortable with her looks. Maybe you should talk to her about it like an adult and let her know how your feeling.

[CapricornHoney]

Not at all. Shorts and sports bra are normal to wear during the warm summer months - especially if she has the body to match.

[Asker]

She does have the body to match but other women her age don’t usually dress like her

[CapricornHoney]

So? What she’s wearing is totally appropriate. Doesn’t matter what the other women are wearing, the probably just don’t have the body to match.

[Asker]

You’re right

[Screenwriter]

Your mom is young and showing off her fit body. Why are you so put off by this?

[Asker]

Because it’s kinda weird

[_Verse_]

If you got it, flaunt it - sorry that it's your mum

[Asker]

Huh?

[_Verse_]

Err, nevermind.. how old are you?

[Asker]

I’m 16

[Screenwriter]

Dude if you're mom's happy and your dad or stepdad isn't complaining, don't worry about it. You can have a talk with her that you feel uncomfortable that she is SO comfortable cause maybe some of your friends said something? You thinks she's too sexual? Tell her your issues if you have a good relationship and can talk about it.

[oncpl]

She is more than mature. You have no right to object to her dress, even she prefers to stay naked. Don't infringe upon her right and preference.

[Asker]

I’m sorry man I’m just concerned if people think that she is a hooker or smth

[oncpl]

She knows well what others may think of her. She seems to be an independent, courageous and confident lady.

[Asker]

Ok dude

[oncpl]

Please don't think of it seriously. Let her live her own preferred life.

[Shiver]

She's an adult, if she wants to show off her sex appeal, let her.

[Anonymous]

Hard to tell from the description, whats her phone number?

[Asker]

What does that have to do wiyh anything?

[Anonymous]

No, I don't think so. But if she starts stealing your weed and hooking up with your friends... then you might need to have an intervention

[Billneidrich77]

So, she is an adult and can dress the other way she wants.

[Anonymous]

Nope, you're just a teenaged prude

[Screenwriter]

Of course he is. Bet you'd feel the same if your hot mom dressed like that. Come on. Cut him some slack.

[hellacray]

So... Tell me more about this mother of yours.

[Asker]

What do I tell?

[hellacray]

Yeah

[Asker]

She is really hot and has a great booty

[hellacray]

And?

[Asker]

5’3 and blonde. I don’t know what else to tell.

[Liam_Hayden]

It's only seems this way because it's your mother.

[bangyourhead]

I'd need pics to let you know.

[Anonymous]

Your mom is probably also a hooker

[Asker]

Fuck you man