I hate having my girlfriend's dog sleep with us in bed. What can I do?

Question

Told my girlfriend, I hate having the dog sleep with us. She has had her dog for over 7years so naturally, they are attached to one another. I love her dog but there isn't much room in the bed and I dont believe animals belong in bed with u. She told me how girlfriends in the past have said something and she would get up and sleep on the couch with the dog. Last night while in bed, I put what I feel like is my security blanket over her and she said it smells of the dog. That's when I mentioned that well, I wash the sheets and blankets but if we keep letting the dog in the bed itll smell. I also mentioned how I dont really like the dog in bed, even when we are intimate, she is ok with the dog being there. She seemed understanding but then said, "just dont be surprised if I sometimes get up and lay wherever the dog is." I replied that it would make me upset bc a significant other belongs in bed with one another, not choosing to sleep with the dog over me. Mind you, the dog snores, isn't small, and She (my girlfriend) has severeeeeee sleep disorders.. talks in her sleep, shakes, wakes up often, has scratched me, pulled my hair, loud outburst... you name it. I can deal with a human having issues bc she can't help it however, I'm starting to feel like the dog situation is going to rip us apart. Last night she sent the dog on the couch, I know she will be resentful about it... but I dont even let my DAUGHTER sleep with me. Also even the dog sleeping on the couch is an issue for me. Not to sound snobby but I've worked hard for my things and they are expensive. I dont want a dog on them. I never thought an animal could tear two people apart but it saddens me to think I'm making her sad bc of me not welcoming her dog. I know people with animals view their pets as children and it would bother me if someone wasn't excepting to my daughter. Personally I dont put animals on the same level as people but their are some who do.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I can understand why this is difficult and I’m like your girlfriend. I personally don’t mind my dogs on my bed or furniture, but I like my dog laying with me due to depression and anxiety. Plus, I heavily keep up with their grooming and hygiene along with cleaning, so odor, dirt and scratches are things I don’t deal with. I understand both sides of the spectrum, but it’s difficult when both spouses don’t agree because there’s no right way. It simply comes down to preference and I don’t think not allowing dogs on furniture/beds doesn’t mean you don’t love them. I’m going to try to help as much as I can.

Does the dog have beds? By the sound of it, that’s not the case. I think it’s good for dogs to have something they can call theirs. I think having elevated dog beds are great. It’s good to have them in the living room and bedroom. I use a cot, an orthopedic bed and a pup rug or plush blanket. Dogs LOVE this and my dog sometimes prefers it over my bed. A dogs bed should be an investment, just like ours. If you want them to like it and use it long term, it has to be comfortable and they’ll be less tempted to jump on your things. If the pup rug is too expensive I like this blanket on top of a dog bed.
https://www.amazon.com/Chanasya-Longfur-Blanket-Lightweight-Microfiber/dp/B071VBV18X

It unfortunately sounds like you both have to compromise and make a decision. For example, having the dog have its own spot on the bed and keeping a shag blanket on the area to prevent fur and odor, or investing in a good beds along with teaching the dog “off”. Having a barrier between the bed and furniture helps. I will let you know, it’s difficult to train a dog out of sleeping on furniture/beds, if that’s all they’ve known. However, dogs in the room during intimacy would be a big no no for me. It won’t be easy and the dog will be stubborn, but I think training the dog to come off and on is a good first step. Plus, if the dog smells like “dog”, it means the owner is not keeping up with the dog’s hygiene. I’m a firm believer in dog paw wipes, dog cologne sprays, grooming quality bathing two times a month, biweekly nail trims, etc.

I would have a hard time compromising, I’ll admit that but that’s why I’d voice that if I’m in a relationship first. Not everyone is a dog person or wants them on furniture and that’s okay, but this should be communicated.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

I hope you haven't invested too much time with this woman. It's clear the dog is more important to her than you are. The dog is there when you are INTIMATE? She leaves your bed to sleep with the dog on the couch? SHE complains that the blanket smells of dog? The DOG snores, passes gas and is large... The DOG, the dog, the dog. It is clearly YOU or the dog. The problem is you let the dog in your relationship and the dog is NOT going to leave. I suggest you do, as sad as that realization is. She's NOT giving up the dog. She has also made it CLEAR that this issue has come up with former lovers, and they've all left. Now you know why. Plan your exit.

devilman666 · Accepted Answer

Sounds to me like you just don't like animals. I understand wanting the dog off the bed during sexy times, but you don't even let it on the couch? So you just want it to lay on the floor all day everyday? Or would you prefer having it chained up outside 24/7?

Whatever, you should probably break up, clearly she loves the dog a lot and you can't stand being anywhere near it. Don't date someone who has a pet if you hate animals, clearly it won't work, they won't get rid of their pet for you and it's selfish as hell for you to ask. If a girlfriend asked me to get rid of my cat, or told me she couldn't deal with my cat sleeping on the bed the relationship would end immediately.

Twalli · Accepted Answer

My dog sleeps in my room and sometimes on my bed. It isn't a huge issue when my girlfriend is over because she will just leave the bed if she doesn't get enough room. She also snores on occasion, but she's a big dog (labradoodle) so the size situation may be different.

pervertedjester · Answer

Putting a small amount of cyan pepper around the bed will keep the dog away and leave your partner none the wiser. (at first)

Anonymous · Answer

I found one good thing, that my last girlfriend was allergic to dogs and cats...

I have dog now and it has its own warm bed near radiator in other room and I wash it as soon as I smell that stench coming.

No I hate dog in my bed too, as all of them, that I had snored and just had to scratch and move all night. I'm very light sleeper I wake up even when something makes noise in other side of house, that is why I have to have radio on all night...

Don't worry dogs do not live long past 7 y. o., yes it is not best wish to have, but such is life.

Even try to pretend that you have allergy to dogs somehow developed later and no you do not want pills for that.

noxius · Answer

A significant other should always be prioritized over the animals in my opinion. It strikes me as weird and offensive not to do so. I could understand if it was just the start of the relationship and the dog has more meaning when the relationship is uncertain, but if your staying together the other person should get more attention than the dog which is allowed to sleep in between them.
If it were me I would just blame it on my fur allergies ^^

GOOSEBOY78 · Answer

you have answered your own question: if its her or the dog she won't pick you. as you have said she had 7 years to bond with the dog. its clear its not a small cute cuddly puppy anymore but thats what she sees the dog as. yes the dog is one big annoying snoring lump.

here is the thing, you can't just move the dog out of the bed: because he has been taught the couch and bed are his domain.

Angelo75 · Answer

I enjoyed reading this post.
My wife also had a cat.
When we moved in, the talk was rather simple.
Cat is not sleeping i bed with us, cuz I find it yucky.
So the cat stayed in its basket to sleep etc...

Later on the cat decided to start scratching around.
I vividly remember how I just bought this $1300 L-shaped couch and the animal started scratching in it, while having two scratching posts in the house.

Next week the cat was transfered to my brother-in-law. >:-|

jspl90 · Answer

Well the dog sleeping in the same bed is nothing (well my family has had a big pack of dogs since i was a kid so more weird for me if there is not a dog around) BUT having the dog in the same room during sex is weird as fuck🤔

jss123 · Answer

I understand it being in the room but in the bed is a step too far. Your girlfriend needs therapy if she's so dependent on a dog.. Just remember you can't fix damaged people. If you try they'll damage you as well. Its happened to me a few times. I ended up needing therapy.
That kind of sleep disorder points to lots of underlying issues though. My ex was raped and she had those kinds of dreams every night.

Usernamesrdumb · Answer

Lol good luck. My girlfriend dog sleeps between us. Its a cock blocker.

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

Dude get the dog a bitch if it's male and vice versa and build a kennel both of you will be happy Then both of you can enjoy your privacy😏

TravelerNikki00 · Answer

Try sleeping in another bed maybe that send a message my ex did that I had break up with her she didn’t respect my feelings.

jimmy2 · Answer

Man that like saying our baby not going to be kick out of our bed. Accept it dude

Beta_Wolf · Answer

Just kick the dog out of bed

wewpet · Answer

I want to hug my dog fast asleep

I hate having my girlfriend's dog sleep with us in bed. What can I do?

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