Niece has a crush on my husband?

[Anonymous]

She started saying that he should call her the pet names he gave me. Like baby girl, brat etc it’s really weird lol mind you this is a 13 year old kid. She has started wearing little skirts around that show her butt cheeks. I told her sorry you can’t dress like that around my house. She also thought it Was ok to walk around in her training bra and underwear. She went as far to say why would my husband like me? What in the world is going on? I’m embarrassed and hurt a little bit. Also me and her mother don’t have a good relationship. She doesn’t really like me, but I didn’t know her daughter would be acting this way. What should I do? I caught her coping down my husband phone number. Now me and my husband is changing our numbers. I’m so confused.

[btbc92]

There is no confusion with this. She is a young woman. And her age has zip to do with it. Society got this wrong assuming kid are kids. At puberty your either a woman or a man. That's it. And she is becoming a woman who is not respecting herself and wants to act all "grown-up". Even so, she is hyper-sexualizing herself because she sexually desires your husband and is bitter with you. Because she wants him. And she wants her first experience with your husband. Nothing confusing about that.

It's possible her mom may be putting her up to it, but it's clear she is doing this herself. She will try even if it's not your husband, she may start sex early if given the chance. It could be demons, and it sounds like spirits influencing her. She may be into porn and this sadly is something you need to address with her mother. You and your husband both.

If she doesn't learn to stop and understand this is not appropriate what she is doing let alone how she is behavior for a woman, then that girl should NOT be in your house. PERIOD. She thinks having skimpy outfits gets a man, she is being taught wrong. It's whorish. She wants to know why your husband wants you, let your husband tell her what he needs to tell her in love. That she is not doing what she is doing. Because if you were that kind of woman, he wouldn't have married you. I am sure your husband loves you, but this mess is crossing the line. It is best to sit her down and tell her she is doing something that is wrong, and she will attract the wrong kind of attention and it will lead to trouble. Her trying to pin on your husband is wrong and disrespectful. You are going to have to find out where she is getting this behavior from, sit her down, and try to curve this behavior for her sake, the sake of the marriage and what is going on between you and her mother. If she won't listen to you, then your husband has to be the one to do it. What is your husband's reactions and what he is doing about this? I am a bit concern that it sounds like your taking the lead more than he is. That sounds like a red flag.

[Asker]

I love her so much, but I think your right. I’m going to have to put up boundaries. My husband said keep her out of our household because he knows how her parents feel about me. He said exactly what you said about the mother putting her up to it.

[btbc92]

All the more reason why you need to listen to your husband because this is a big no-no. I understand and know you love her. But that girl needs help. She is starting to shape her sexuality into perversions and it shouldn't be. Not only is it not right for any woman to do it, but she is too young. She is being influenced by something she shouldn't. If somebody is telling her and influencing her to behave like that, that is child abuse and it needs to be reported.

[btbc92]

Thank God for your husband. Because if she is going to be in your presence there is going to need to be some serious ground rules.

[Asker]

She looked at my text messages to him and there was nude pictures of me and him in there

[btbc92]

And should that not tell you two to not have those kinds of things on your phone or something either of you should be doing? It's not my personal business, but how can anybody judge this girl when you two are doing these things and you're married? What do you think you're teaching her? That this is permissiable.