Have you ever stolen anything?

[bigpauly]

[MCheetah]

Lots of things. Mostly batteries. I was an expert thief in my youth (that's what happens when you grow up poor and they want seven f*cking dollars for some Duracells). But I haven't stolen anything in a long time. Other than women's hearts!

... Okay, that was obviously a lie.

[ShadezMcgee]

When I was a kid I stole candy from a store. Stopped doing it shortly after the first time. I think I did it out of curiosity moreso to see if I could get away with it. Which I did.

[bigpauly]

More of a science experiment

[Emiliamazing]

Noooooooo!

Borrowed, for sure. Borrowed without asking, yes. I've never stolen anything.

[bigpauly]

Borrowed without asking and never gave back?

(I’m surprised you didn’t throw a Borrowers jab in there)

[Emiliamazing]

Oh no. I always return what I borrow. Just an instance in college when I borrowed a cute dress from my roommate.

[bigpauly]

I was just messing with you. I know you’re an honest egg

[AsaKyo]

Yeah, I used to steal fancy mechanical pencils a lot in school

[Emiliamazing]

@bigpauly I've never even stolen candy from a baby!

[bigpauly]

Hmm I don't know if I can trust that…

[Emiliamazing]

Babies are really good at sharing

[Emiliamazing]

There, I stole the napkin you use as a comforter.

[SaoirseS]

No, never. You know my passionate dislike of thieves.

[bigpauly]

And pity the fool who steals from you

[SaoirseS]

Or even tries to.

[SaoirseS]

Some of the staff here thought I was going to end up on an episode of "Snapped" over toilet paper, tampon, and pad theft during the height of the pandemic.

[bigpauly]

😂😂😂

[Apple1996]

Yeah but mostly on accident

[FunkyMonkee]

They jumped into your pocket without you knowing it?

[Apple1996]

@FunkyMonkee more like tiny items fall under the carseat or stroller when I have my kids. Just the other day I walked out of Walmart without paying for avocados cuz they were under the carseat. So it is truly a accident

[FunkyMonkee]

Oh, yes. I've almost done that a time or two, too.
2 months ago, I got free 32GB jump drive in a fairly similar way. I bought a set of speakers at a Staples a year ago and, before they were even a year old, the sub woofer died on me.
2 months ago, a friend of mine took me to different Staples to get himself a jump drive so I could load Woodstock and a bunch of Beatles and psych music onto it for him and, they were on sale so, I picked one up for myself. When I went to pay for it, I was asking the cashier about how to return or exchange the speaker as he was ringing me up. The drive was just over $9 so, I gave him a sawbuck but, when he gave me the change, I got 2 $5's plus the handful of coins! We finished our talk and I left the store with Ralph. and we got in his car and drove away. Several miles away, it hit me that I had more money now than when I went to Staples and that he GAVE me money to walk out of the store with the drive!! I think what happened was that, when I pulled out my cash to pay him, he saw the $20 I had and, when I gave him the $10, because he was distracted by the discussion, he thought I gave him a $20 so, he gave me change for the $20! The strange thing is, why did he give me 2 5's instead of the 10 I just gave him? UNLESS, he didn't have ANY 10's and stuck mine into the 20's slot in his drawer (or under the drawer, sometimes they're told to put anything $20 and up under it.) and then gave me the 2 5's. Either way, I got a free jump drive AND almost a dollar in change!! Ralph wasn't about to drive all that way back to sort it out!

[LavLavLuv]

nope.. for sure

everybody knows i'm a good girl officer👼

[bigpauly]

I’m having a hard time buying this 🧐

[LavLavLuv]

no i wouldn't do a thing like that🥺

[bigpauly]

I’ll let you off with a warning this time..

[LavLavLuv]

ok thanks

[call_me_scar]

Yeah I stole the school IDs of bullies back in Jr high

[bigpauly]

Lol we’re they not able to get in them?

[call_me_scar]

Well I stole them in class so they were still in the school if that's what your asking, but they need the ID for things around the school like getting books if you lost it, it would cost 5 bucks for a new one

[bigpauly]

I see

[sirderpsalot123]

I stole @dustybiker 's heart. She just refuses to admit it.

[sirderpsalot123]

I'm hilarious

[sirderpsalot123]

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[bigpauly]

All you stole was hers and my questions 😒

[sirderpsalot123]

Yeah.. I should have known you were going to say that. I set myself up for this one.

[bigpauly]

Lmao

[dustybiker]

@bigpauly ✋

@sirderpsalot123 🤮🤮🤮

[bigpauly]

@dustybiker lmao

[sirderpsalot123]

@dustybiker Thank you for the dislike 😏🤗

[dustybiker]

@sirderpsalot123 You love me cutie. 😁🤗 (🤣)

[sirderpsalot123]

@dustybiker Not when you call me that 🤢

[dustybiker]

@sirderpsalot123 I actually love the number of laughing faces you added up there 🤣🤣🤣🤣 shows the terror you were feeling for the reply to come. 😈

[sirderpsalot123]

@dustybiker Honestly, I'm kind of disappointed... just a few vomit emojis? Wasn't worth the suspense. 😒

[dustybiker]

@sirderpsalot123 I just woke up. My brain is either rambling or pathetic. Give it a min.

[sirderpsalot123]

@Dustybiker I just saw some aggressive comment from a cranky dusty who "just woke up" ... You could have done better here. Just saying.

[dustybiker]

@sirderpsalot , @OddBeMe always gets it out of my system. Then you are left with residual aggressive me.

[dustybiker]

123…

[sirderpsalot123]

4...5... why are we counting?

[sirderpsalot123]

Nvm. I didn't notice that you messed up my tag... lmao

[sirderpsalot123]

@sirderpsalot You might be a good guy but I'm really starting to not like you.

[dustybiker]

*whistling*

[OddBeMe]

Damn Dusty, you got all us guys after you.
(preparing my dueling pistols)

[dustybiker]

@OddBeMe Fear not. Derp boy has removed himself from my radar.

[sirderpsalot123]

@dustybiker I was on your radar?

[dustybiker]

@sirderpsalot123 No. Your pervy shirt is like the stealth bomber skin.

[OddBeMe]

1) derp
2) stealth bomber skin
Wtf?

[dustybiker]

@OddBeMe Don’t ask. And the second was sarcasm directed at derp.

[OddBeMe]

@dustybiker I'll just call it lezzie talk

[dustybiker]

@OddBeMe Keep the mystery man.

[jennifer_bloom]

A few times and I lost one of the things I stole so I think that was God working. This was in my 20s.

[Chazmatazz269]

Yeah… lots. thanks for the bad memories! Ell oh ell!

[FunkyMonkee]

Yeah, a few times but it was all small stuff that cost less than a dollar.

[FunkyMonkee]

When I was a kid I stole a pack of Fruit Stripe gum. It was only a nickel but, I didn't have one. 8 or 10 years later, I kinda stole a 50 cent pack of incense. I WAS planing to buy some and asked the guy to let me smell a couple, then we started talking about records, or something and, while they were sitting on the counter, I thought I'd try to slip one up my sleeve without him seeing me. It worked, and I fully intended on putting it back or paying for it but, once I lifted it, I figured he'd get pissed at me if he found out so, I just walked out and didn't pay for it. 20 to 25 years later, I found a record distributor that threw out records by the thousands!! So, at least once a week, I'd go raid their dumpster and come home with at least a thousand more records. One night, I went to raid the dumpster and discovered that they left the roll-up garage door open. I stepped inside to investigate in case someone broke in to steal money and I didn't see anyone but, found shitloads of records!! I had a look through some of the stacks and found brand new Beatles singles on coloured vinyl and just couldn't help myself so, I took a few copies of each one. At one point, they actually threw away a full box of them so, I just figured, let me get some before they toss those, too, and someone else grabs them!! Upon leaving, I closed the door for them.
There WAS another time when I was about 8, we were at a what-not store (they sold EVERYTHING!) and, while I was looking at the records, I noticed there were sliding doors under the record shelves and looked to see what was under there. Loads more records, ones I'd never seen or heard of before! I figured they weren't gonna put them up for sale and were gonna toss `em so, I grabbed a big stack of them and went out to the car! My parents discovered the records in the car and asked where I got `em, I told them and they made me take them back inside!!

[jamesgoldman]

No, had some purchases that were so cheap I might as well have stolen them

[Sparkie460]

Absolutely not. If I don't have the money to buy it I won't get it.

[gerald5466]

No, I have not but if I wanted to I could steal anyone's girl. I'm 6'2, athletic, and light skin so i would say I'm attractive

[loveslongnails]

Yes, when I was young, and I'm not proud of that!

[Agape93]

Yeap. Food, hearts, minds and virginities

[bigpauly]

My idol

[Agape93]

Lol.

[Msputiton]

Yes.

[bigpauly]

Give me back my J’s!

[Msputiton]

Lmao. Naw i was 6 and it was a toy from the store

[bigpauly]

Lol ahhhhim tellin!

[Msputiton]

Snitch 😭

[bigpauly]

You need to learn your lesson!

[Msputiton]

Oh i did trust that.
I couldn't even play with it or sleep. I just knew i was going to jail for ever.
I threw it in the trash😭

[bigpauly]

😂 awwwwww

[Msputiton]

Shush😡

[bigpauly]

It’s cute though! I feel bad for little Mia staying up all night worried 🤗

[Msputiton]

I'm not white. It's miah🤣

[bigpauly]

😂😂 oh ok

[Degenerate]

I stole a bottle of pills to OD on

[NathanDavis]

just a few hearts, and souls...

[Havthrills]

Nope. Don't think I ever have

[exitseven]

Yes, I have.

[Anonymous]

Yes.